TUESDAY, Feb. 24, 2008 - S. A. Anderson (1989 Bond Girl Bouvier / Professzor Rubik / Steely Dan's stellar seller / Slacker's bane)

Relative difficulty: Easy

THEME: Bird verbs - three theme answers (all phrased "_____ ONE'S _____") begin with verbs that are also bird names


Word of the Day: GORP (35D: Hiker's snack) - A mixture of high-energy foods, such as nuts and dried fruit, eaten as a snack.

Tuesday. More like a Monday. Birds are verbs. Believe I've seen similar theme before. Nothing new under sun, I guess. Theme density is really quite sparse - as sparse as I've seen in a good long while. Another 15 [whoops, 16! This grid is one square wider than your normal M-Sat. grid - not sure this weak theme warrants such shenanigans, but clearly I didn't notice, so maybe it's irrelevant] - starting over: another 16 might have made this more enjoyable. Or it might just have made it theme-ier.

Theme answers:

• 21A: Strain to see over the top (CRANE one's neck)
• 41A: Eat humble pie (SWALLOW one's pride)
• 59A: Be a street peddler (HAWK one's wares)

Another about which there isn't a lot to say. The middle is oddly, delightfully Scrabbly, such that I can excuse the absurd density of abbreviations in there. XBOX goes nicely with GAMERS (27D: Arcade fans). ON KP (39D: Preparing hash for G.I. Joe, say) brings the total of military abbrevs. in this puzzle to three, though the clue makes it sound like the answer should be PLAYING WITH DOLLS - see also SSGTS (44D: U.S.M.C. noncoms) and PFC (65D: Low-rank inits.). I have never seen PEGS defined the way it is today (51A: Hard throws to first base, say). Did you hit the runner? The first basemen? That definition of PEG I know. Maybe you PICKED the runner off? Unclear. The "A" on Hester's chest is "Scarlet." I know this because of the title of the novel in question - "The SCARLET Letter." If it were "The RED Letter," then RED A would be right at 62D: Stigma borne by Hester Prynne. Not sure what to make of X AND O (58D: Tic-tac-toe alternatives); phrased that way, I'd expect to see X OR O. Honestly, I first expected the answer would be games of some sort - HANGMANS? I guess the plural makes it hard for that sense of the clue to be correct.

Best answers of the day - the symmetrical pairing of WIGGLE ROOM (19A: Margin to maneuver) and PAPER TIGER (65A: Toothless enemy). Wonderful, interesting, dynamic answers.

Valiant attempts to make this puzzle more exciting than it is can be found in the aggressive rhyming in clues like 3D: Hummus scooper-upper (pita) and 66D: Steely Dan's stellar seller ("Aja"). One of the hits off of "AJA" - PEG!



Bullets:

• 17A: Ancient region with an architectural style named after it (Ionia) - highly desirable word for its voweliness. Along with AIOLI, one of the few five-letter words that are 80% vowels.
• 28A: G.P.S. offering (map) - clue signals abbrev. Boo. No fair. I had RTE.
• 69A: Norwegian coast feature (fjord) - with the nice OSLO pick-up (73A: Capital on a 69-Across).
• 5D: Land-use regulators (zoners) - ouchy. See also SSS (53A: Sound of bacon frying), which is worse than it might have been given its role in adding "S"s to the ends of three different words. Feels almost like cheating.
• 10D: Haberdashery accessory (tie clasp) - TIE CLIP wouldn't fit. What's the difference between a tie clip and a TIE CLASP. Turns out: nothing.
• 11D: Slacker's bane (work) - don't I know it.
• 14D: 1989 Bond girl Bouvier (Pam) - Mystery Answer of the day. Never heard of her. "Bouvier" is Marge Simpson's maiden name. You may need to know that some day.

Signed, Rex Parker, King of CrossWorld

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WEDNESDAY, Apr. 23, 2008 - Stephen Edward Anderson (LISTING IN HOYLE'S)

Relative difficulty: Medium

THEME: "RIDE 'EM / COWBOY" (30D: With 27-Down, western cry) - four theme answers features phrases whose final words are also the names of famous horses

The horses and their riders:

• SILVER - Lone Ranger
• TOPPER - Hopalong Cassidy
• TRIGGER - Roy Rogers
• SCOUT - Tonto

I have only one problem with this puzzle. Tonto is not a "COWBOY." Other than that, genius. This is an exemplary Wednesday puzzle - themed like a Monday or Tuesday, but executed with originality and panache in ways you don't often see on early-week puzzles. The phrase RIDE 'EM / COWBOY, as well as its placement in the grid, takes this puzzle from good to great. The non-theme fill is fine - occasionally brilliant - but that doesn't matter, because today is all about the theme (which, frankly, I didn't get til after I was done with the puzzle - "QUICK, CHART, HAIR, TALENT ... what do they have in common?").

Theme answers:

• 17A: Mercury (quickSILVER)
• 11D: #1 on the Hot 100 (chart TOPPER)
• 25D: Discoverer of stars? (talent SCOUT)
• 60A: Easily set off, as a temper (hair TRIGGER)

Started off badly in the NW, as I had no idea what 1A: Low pitch symbol (F clef) could be, and 1D: Help page rubric was equally mystifying ... despite the fact that this blog has one: FAQ (Frequently Asked Questions). The easy-to-get QUICKSILVER, however, gave me that precious "Q" and took care of all of my NW problems. Tried to go straight down the West coast but was thwarted when I could not think of a three-letter OIL for 23A: What French fries are fried in. Never would have considered the rare and exotic HOT OIL. Why does the capital "F" in "French" feel wrong to me when it's applied to fries? Anyway, moving on - IN A STIR (29A: All riled up). Ick. This and BOARDS (54A: SATs) were the most irksome answers of the day, the former because I don't know who would say it (certainly not a cowboy) and the latter because I've never ever ever heard the word "BOARDS" applied to that stupid high school test. Medical BOARDS, yes ... are SATs "College BOARDS?" So many much better non-SAT clues available for BOARDS. Be creative!!! Also didn't like the clue for TOADY (57A: Courtier). Way too harsh an answer for a simple descriptive clue like [Courtier], which means simply "an attendant to a monarch or other powerful person". I see that a secondary definition of "Courtier" involves obsequious behavior and insincere flattery. OK. Still don't like it. Boring clue for such a deliciously ugly word.

Where was I? Oh yeah, [All riled up] = IN A STIR. I should say that the first answer I entered there was SPASTIC (shares four consecutive letters with IN A STIR). Answer felt wrong (morally wrong), but it fit and seemed at least ballparkish, meaning-wise. The had me wondering why the word I wanted to be ONUS (24D: Big burden) could only be OPUS, which thus kept me on the fence about whether 33A: Listing in Hoyle's should be RULE (which it is) or GAME (which it isn't). From there, I ventured into the middle of the puzzle, uncovered the fabulous RIDE 'EM / COWBOY with just the RI- in place (couldn't believe my great fortune when my first guess was right - I had my fingers crossed). From there, I just radiated out in all directions, in what particular order I can't remember. Possibly down the tried-and-true ISOBAR (39D: Weather map line) past the fantastically colloquial pair of NO DICE (50D: "I ain't buyin' it!") and OKAY GUY (46D: Nice enough fellow) into yet an another BOARD exam - GRE (62D: M.A. hopeful's test), and then ... it's all fuzzy from there.

Remainder:

• 21A: Where to spend time with moguls? (ski run) - this is a perfectly good phrase, but it seems somehow to hover on the margins of legitimacy, as does HAD A BIT (38A: Ate, but not much), which makes me desperately want to add an "E" to its end.
• 47D: Soap alternative (sitcom) - Nobody makes this choice: "Let's see ... 'As the World Turns'? ... or 'My Two Dads'?" True, with cable, SITCOMs are likely on opposite soaps all the time, but these two genres technically belong to two completely different parts of the TV schedule.
• 28A: Other, in Zaragoza (otro) - here's a case of trying (too hard) to Seuss up the clue for a very ordinary answer. Pet peeve about this word (as far as its puzzleness goes): stupid gender! OTRO or OTRA? Dunno. Gotta wait.
• 34A: Tower-top attraction (view) - weird. Good, but weird. I was trying to imagine part of a tower. TURRET? SPIRE? ARROW LOOPS?
• 36A: Bear, in Bilbao (oso) - Why not [Bear, in Zaragoza]? "Donde esta el OTRO OSO?!" (exclaimed the Spanish zookeeper).
• 40A: "Bill Moyers Journal" airer (PBS) - I should add "airer" to my list of "Only In Crossword Clues" words.
• 45A: Archer who aims for the heart (Eros) - wanted ANNE, as I used to have a minor crush on her. I remember seeing "Fatal Attraction" and thinking "Why would anyone cheat on such a hot wife with such a scary, scary lady?"
• 47A: Part of the Kazakhstan landscape (steppe) - one of my favorite geographical words. I learned it from Mrs. Mc... Mc... dang, what was my 7th grade Geography teacher's name. I had a crush on her daughter when I was in grade school ... Ugh. Memory ... fading. I remember I did a massive project on Tanzania. Mrs. STEVENS! Woo hoo, Memory, back. I thought her name was McSomething because the boy that her daughter liked when I liked her daughter was named McConnell. Freudian!
• 52A: Type measures (ems) - learned this and its counterpart, ENS, from xwords.
• 59A: Barracks boss, for short (NCO) - another common, important xword word.
• 65A: Bygone French coin (sou) - had the "U," but that didn't help, as the answer could just as easily have been ÉCU.
• 2D: Premier _____ (wine designation) (cru) - helped a lot that this was an answer in a recent late-week themeless puzzle.
• 7D: Pinball stoppers (tilts) - like the word, but not in the plural.
• 12D: Prognostication (augury) - so so proud of how quickly I got this - off just the "R," I think.
• 35D: Wave catcher? (ear) - yeah, OK. It catches sound waves.
• 56D: Sister and wife of Hyperion (Thea) - no idea. None. What myth is this from? Ah, I see, they are both Titans, the son and daughter of Gaia and Uranus.
• 58D: Former newspaper publisher _____ Chandler (Otis) - no idea. None. As I have likely said before, there is only one Chandler I care to know:

Signed, Rex Parker, King of CrossWorld

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THURSDAY, Mar. 20, 2008 - Stephen Edward Anderson (South-of-the-border border town portmanteau)

Relative difficulty: Medium-Challenging

THEME: Border town portmanteaus - border towns whose names are hybrids of the states whose borders they lie on



I must finish my grading by class time, so this will have to be very quick. In short, I did not like this puzzle. Found the place names absurd (though a couple were familiar) and the non-theme fill either boring or painfully forced. Had terrible trouble in the far north and the SE, for reasons I'll explain below.


Theme answers:

• 20A: South-of-the-border border town portmanteau (Mexicali, Mexico) - here, I had no idea what was going on - I had the MEXICALI part (or most of it) and thought maybe some totally new word was being invented. MEXICO is not part of the "portmanteau," so it took me Forever to figure out that the state name would be part of the answer.
• 25A: Plains border town portmanteau (Kanorado, Kansas) - stupidest name of them all.
• 42A: Mid-Atlantic border town portmanteau (Delmar, Delaware) - this is weird. Del Mar just means "of the sea" in Spanish. Are people in DELMAR, DE sure they're living in a portmanteau and not just a city with a Spanish name?
• 47A: South-central border town portmanteau (Texarkana, Texas)

And I now officially hate the word "portmanteau" (you can type it only so many times before the hatred starts to well up)

Bullets:

• 5A: Burns and Cowper (bards) - hate hate hate this. Maybe it's because I teach poetry most every day of my damned life, but I hate the word BARD. It's pretentious and dated and rightly should be attached only to Shakespeare and ancient Celtic minstrel poets. Further, Cowper??? On a Thursday? Wow. OK, Let's stay in the north for a sec ...:
• 8D: Run (out of) (drum) - the heart of my trouble up there in the north. Is this supposed to be a phrase meaning to "run" someone "out of" ... town? I have never ever ever heard this word used this way. I do not doubt that there is a valid dictionary definition to back this up, but the phrasing here is just horrible. A Horribly written clue. When you go to parentheses in your clue, you better have damned good reason. DRUM ... ugh.
• 16A: Locale of the highways H1 and H2 (Oahu) - Not sure what to do with this clue. Got this from crosses. Nothing about this clue says Hawaii to me. (Is that what the "H"s stand for?)
• 18A: Animal in the 2005 film "Madagascar" (lemur) - beginning of all my troubles. I had HIPPO. There were many LEMURS, just one HIPPO (one of the main characters), so the singular "animal" led me to HIPPO. This is what happens when you know far more than you should about children's animated fare.
• 23A: "_____ certainly do not!" ("No, I") - another terrible clue. A painful partial. I can't hear someone saying this. When I hear it, there is no "No" at the beginning, and there is a "most" between "I" and "certainly."
• 24A: Te-_____ cigars (amo) - why the hyphen?
• 36A: Each state, symbolically (star) - ????? I have no idea what this means. [thanks to the commenter who pointed out what must have been obvious to most people: stars = states on the U.S. flag]
  
• 45A: Issue pikes and poleaxes, e.g. (arm) - I love the image. If only that's how people "ARMed" themselves these days.
• 55A: Minestrone morsels (orzo) - zing, a "Z." I like this.
• 56A: "The Big Trail" or "The Big Stampede" (oater) - one of my favorite crossword words.
• 57A: Source for an outburst (nova) - why "for" and not "of?" The clue is almost clever, but something about it feels off. Many of today's clues feel like they were tortured in a desperate attempt to make them difficult/clever, resulting only in carnage.
• 58A: The Putumayo River forms part of its norther border (Peru) - news to me.
• 59A: Two bells, in a sailor's middle watch (one a.m.) - I'd like to thank the puzzle for teaching me that this "bells" stuff is sailor-talk for time.
• 63A: Donkey _____ (Kong) - mmmm, that's what I need. Take me back to a simpler time, when a quarter could get me Joan Jett on the jukebox and another quarter could get me countless hours of electronic ape-fighting.
• 3D: Doonesbury's daughter in "Doonesbury" (Alex) - news to me.
• 4D: Takeout alternative (tv dinner) - do they make these anymore? And if they do, do they actually call them TV DINNERs? Seems so ... pre-1980, somehow.
• 5D: 1950s-'70s Chevy (Bel Air) - had no idea. The final piece in my crazy northern puzzle. I thought I had seen every make of car I would ever see in a puzzle. Guess not. These seem to have been discontinued before my time (i.e. before makes of cars became part of my vocabulary).
• 6D: Jump and a twist (axel) - Where is the first indefinite article? Odd. Anyway, I'm grateful for this clue, as it helped me start to undo the north.
• 7D: Do trailers? (re mi) - in the end, I have to give it up for this clue. I Hated it when I was in the middle of solving, because I couldn't make it work. I thought the answer was SEMI for a while (trailers ... tractor trailers ... semis ... ). But once I got it, I had to acknowledge its cleverness.
• 21D: Nighttime scavenger, informally (coon) - [Nighttime scavenger, hillbillily]
• 28D: Doleful air (dirge) - Never did like "air" for "song," though it's obviously perfectly legitimate. I always think of "air" as something, well, AIRy, or light, so DIRGE seems out of place here.
• 29D: Buck _____, first African-American coach in Major League Baseball (O'Neil) - interesting O'NEIL choice. I like it. After a career in the Negro Leagues with the Kansas City Monarchs, O'NEIL was hired as a coach (not The coach) by the Cubs in 1962.
• 37D: Campus digs (dorm room) - I weirdly miss dorm life. An idyllic, privileged existence.
• 40D: Italian sweetie (cara) - I had CARO, which is a syrup (nope, that's KARO).
• 48D: Fitch of Abercrombie & Fitch (Ezra) - Long Island kids love their mall gear. A&F and Hollister and Aeropostale, plastered across their chests like they were team names. Why? Why do otherwise bright and shiny young people insist on wearing what is essentially a uniform that says "I Shop At The Mall."
• 52D: Tic-tac-toe choice (x or o) - not only my least favorite answer of the puzzle, but possibly my least favorite answer of the year. I can't even speak about it.
• 54D: Trolled (sang) - this word is completely out of concert, aesthetically, with its meaning. I just imagine a bunch of really ugly monsters who live under a bridge singing barbershop quartet.

Signed, Rex Parker, King of CrossWorld

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