19th-century German novelist Theodor / SAT 5-23-26 / Jazz drummer DeRosa / Eerie substance faked in 19th-century ghost hoaxes / Canal blocker? / Chess puzzle challenge, maybe / Old black-and-white police autos, to Brits / Standard 1L course, informally / Lizard predator of Africa / A boxer's might knock you out / Tourist nickname for a Southern mecca, to the chagrin of many locals / Sales job that Forbes magazine once dubbed "the original side hustle," informally / Magpie lookalike with black-and-white plumage / Title for some fictional lords / Accessory on a pub counter

Constructor: Kameron Austin Collins

Relative difficulty: Medium-Challenging

[37D: Title for some fictional lords = DARTH]

THEME: none 

Word of the Day: Theodor FONTANE (32D: 19th-century German novelist Theodor) —

Theodor Fontane (German pronunciation: [ˈtʰeːodoɐ̯ fɔnˈtaːnə] ^ⓘ; 30 December 1819 – 20 September 1898) was a German novelist and poet, regarded by many as the most important 19th-century German-language realist author. He published the first of his novels, for which he is best known today, only at age 58 after a career as a journalist. Many of his novels delve into topics that were more or less taboo for discussion in the polite society of Fontane's day, including marital infidelity, class differences, urban vs. rural differences, abandonment of children, and suicide. His novels sold well during his lifetime and several have been adapted for film or audio works.

Fontane's novels are known for their complex, often sceptical view of society in the German empire. He shows different social and political parts of society meeting and sometimes clashing, his main characters range from lower-middle class to Prussian nobility. Fontane is known as a writer of realism, not only because he was conscientious about the factual accuracy of details in fictional scenes, but also because he depicted his characters in terms of what they said or did and refrained from overtly imputing motives to them. Other trademarks of Fontane's work are their strongly drawn female characters (such as Effi Briest and Frau Jenny Treibel), tender irony and vivid conversations between characters. (wikipedia)

• • •

Dear NYTXW, thank you for keeping Saturday holy, i.e. genuinely tough. I wasn't feeling that thankful early on today, when I had virtually nothing in the NW corner on first pass (just GREED, I think) (23A: One of the seven depicted in the 1995 thriller "Se7en"), but once I got going, and was reassured that the puzzle was, in fact, doable, I was able to appreciate the challenge. That NW corner, though, yeesh. It's funny, because once I finally got in there, it seemed to fall pretty easily, but I could Not get in there until late in the game, after I'd built the entire middle of the puzzle. I got that slightly panicky claustrophobic feeling I get in cut-off corners once in a blue moon, where I realize I'm stuck and help is not coming, i.e. going away and coming back isn't going to add much in the way of new information. All the middle of the puzzle could get me was a few letters at the tail end of the long Acrosses in the NW ... but thank god one of those answers was DOG BREATH, which absolutely saved my bacon. DOG BREATH to the rescue. The relief I felt when I got DOG BREATH. Hurray for dogs. Nice to be rescued by a great clue / answer too (16A: A boxer's might knock you out). Really ups the elation factor. Anyway, once DOG BREATH went in, everything fell pretty quickly and didn't even seem very threatening in retrospect. The clues were just vague or misleading. Only thing I didn't really know was RIG VEDA (3D: Ancient collection of Hindu hymns), and I could at least infer the VEDA part. So the NW gave me the sweats, but the rest was just standard-grade Saturday stuff. The SE actually fell pretty fast compared to the rest of the puzzle, so I got a nice whoosh toward the end (ECTOPLASM! HOTLANTA!), balancing out that grueling beginning. Never heard of FONTANE and was not at all sure about CON LAW (36D: Standard 1L course, informally), but BANTER swooped in at the end to confirm those answers and seal the deal (41A: Bit of back-and-forth).

["... a chi-HUA-HUA ..."]

Lots and lots of things I just didn't know today. We've covered FONTANE and RIG VEDA and CON (i.e. Contract … nope, I’m being told Constitutional) LAW. There's also PANDA CARS (which I have heard of before, maybe from crosswords (?) ... but I wanted PROWL CARS) (27A: Old black-and-white police autos, to Brits), and MUDLARK  (10D: Magpie lookalike with black-and-white plumage) and SOAP STARS (lol I only *just* got that the clue is talking about stars on TV, not stars in the sky) (24A: Daytime regulars), and SAND SNAKE (it's a snake *and* a lizard?) (24D: Lizard predator of Africa) (oh, the snakes prey on lizards! Got it), MARLSTONE (heard of MARL, which is how I ended up completing the answer, but not MARLSTONE). I think that's it for wtfs. I had real trouble, though, with the LOUD in LOUD SHIRT (really wanted a *kind* of shirt, like a style: Hawaiian, polo, something like that). Had TOUR SHIRT in there for a few seconds. Like ... the kind you buy at a concert with the band's tour dates on it ... and maybe "Look at Me!" was supposed to denote that the band was on tour and you should/could go look ... at them? (Yeah I see it makes no sense now). Never seen a singular HEADPHONE before, so that was weird (17D: Canal blocker?). Really wanted something to do with earwax there. Got very thrown by the twin epithets, since one of them was using the term more neutrally, to mean simply "name" (def. 1a) (40A: Epithet lead-in = AKA) and the other was using it to mean a disparaging word (def. 1b) (37A: Many an epithet)—the DIRTY part of DIRTY NAME definitely took some hacking to get. I *think* that covers all my trouble spots, but ... we'll see in the Bullets below. Maybe there are more. Despite / because of all the trouble I had, I enjoyed this puzzle. I liked that it wasn't just tough, but had some genuinely delightful answers in it. DOG BREATH, ECTOPLASM, and HOTLANTA were my top three (HOTLANTA because of its clue, which made me sincerely laugh out loud) (47A: Tourist nickname for a Southern mecca, to the chagrin of many locals).

Bullets:

• 1A: They might be settled atop stools (BAR BETS) — first answer: BOTTOMS. So that's how things started for me.
• 20A: Old auto company based in Lansing, Mich. (REO) — had the O and though I know REO well from decades of doing crosswords, for some reason the only answer I could think of was GTO (which is not a "company"—it's a model of Pontiac)

• 22A: Jazz drummer DeRosa (CLEM) — yeah here we go, found another one I didn't know at all. Don't see many CLEMs in the wild. Weird that two of them are drummers! (CLEM Burke was the drummer for Blondie):

• 2D: Sales job that Forbes magazine once dubbed "the original side hustle," informally (AVON REP) — Just stared at "sales job" wondering what it could possibly mean. "Informally" is weird. It's clearly signifying the abbreviation (REP), but the only term I ever heard for this "sales job" was AVON LADY. The catchphrase was "Avon calling!" but the salespeople were definitely known as Avon Ladies. 

• 27D: Swedish American model Porizkova (PAULINA) — being an '80s kid really, really helped here. PAULINA Porizkova was a supermodel married to Ric Ocasek, frontman for The Cars. She's featured in the video for "Drive"

• 45D: Little squirt (TOT) — had the "T" and wanted TOT but because I've done so many damn crosswords in my life, I also knew that TAD fit the clue (def. 2), so I had to leave those last two letters blank.

That's all for today. See you next time.

Signed, Rex Parker, King of CrossWorld

[Follow Rex Parker on BlueSky and Facebook and Letterboxd]
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Infamous chess trap that ends the game in two moves / FRI 5-22-26 / Qualifier to an embarrassing question / Symbol use in summation / "Sticky" birthday treats? / Genre for Blackpink and Twice / Place to get "pawmpered," say / What some streakers are charged with? / Product of manscaping / ___-Saint-Michel (French commune on a tiny island) / When doubled, a fluffy Chinese dog / Young's partner in accounting

Constructor: Gene Louise De Vera

Relative difficulty: Easy 

THEME: none 

Word of the Day: MONT-Saint-Michel (21A: ___-Saint-Michel (French commune on a tiny island)) —

Mont-Saint-Michel (French pronunciation: [lə mɔ̃ sɛ̃ miʃɛl]; Norman: Mont Saint Miché; English: Saint Michael's Mount) is a tidal island and mainland commune in Normandy, France.

The island lies approximately one kilometre (half a nautical mile) off France's north-western coast, at the mouth of the Couesnon River near Avranches and is 7 hectares (17 acres) in area. The mainland part of the commune is 393 hectares (971 acres) in area so that the total surface of the commune is 400 hectares (990 acres). As of 2023, the island has a population of 23.

The commune's position—on an island just a few hundred metres from land—made it accessible at low tide to the many pilgrims to its abbey, and defensible as the incoming tide stranded, drove off, or drowned threats on foot. The island remained unconquered during the Hundred Years' War. A small garrison fended off a full attack by the English in 1433. Louis XI recognised the benefits of its natural defence and turned it into a prison. The abbey was used regularly as a prison during the Ancien Régime.

Mont-Saint-Michel and its surrounding bay were inscribed on the UNESCO list of World Heritage Sites in 1979 for its unique aesthetic and importance as a Catholic site. It is visited by more than three million people each year, and is the most-visited tourist attraction in France outside of Paris. Over 60 buildings within the commune are protected as historical monuments. (wikipedia)

• • •

[40A]

Really torn about that half star. The grid-spanners today are stunning—five winners, not a clunker among them—but then the fill, especially around the margins, oof, not cool. AwFUL, at times. OLA OPA ASO awFUL. "OK, OK!" No, not OK. "OH, COOL." No, you're not listening, the opposite of cool. LOESS than cool. Fill that only MESO-OAFS could love. Fill that could please only KAL, ELIE, ET ALII (meeting ET ALII early on was extremely disheartening). ONED! Never good, no matter how you clue it. So solving this was like going to amazing highs and then plummeting to dizzying lows. Like a roller coaster ride (yay!) that makes you want to barf at times (boo!). If the fill had been clean, this could've been a four-star puzzle, higher maybe. But as is ... I think it probably deserves three stars. But ... and maybe this is because I turned my spring grades in yesterday ... I am feeling generous. The half star above three acknowledges how good the good stuff is. And now, having grumped about the uglier parts of the grid, I can move on to happier topics.

[29A: Val who played Iceman in "Top Gun"]

ASKING FOR A FRIEND went in like whoooooosh, straight across the grid, after I got the "A" and "I" "N" "G" crosses sorted. A great way to zoom into the grid. That one answer made the whole top part of the puzzle easy to take down and then whoosh, off I shot again, down the length of the grid, all the way to the bottom on the back of MOONLIGHT SONATA! I was less lucky with neighboring EARTHLIKE PLANET—I got the EARTH part easily enough, but then ... those "planets" sounded like stars to me, somehow, so I was like "EARTH ... EARTHLESS STAR? No, too short ... I give up." So I just worked from SONATA and the bottom filled itself in pretty easily—no idea about FOOL'S MATE (61A: Infamous chess trap that ends the game in two moves) but crosses were easy, and then yet another whoooosh with ALL BARK AND NO BITE. With the back end now in place, I could see EARTHLIKE PLANET, and so back up I went to the center for whooosh number four, KILL WITH KINDNESS, which took me into the sides of the grid, which is where I finished. Again, really wish those sides (and all the edges of this grid) weren't so crud-laden—tough to end a largely enjoyable solve by stepping in ONED—but that's how things go some days. As I say, the overall experience was a positive one.

Was it too easy again today? Yes, pretty much, but the oversized grid at least gave me a little more to do. The only thing that really held me up in any discernible way today was EARTHLIKE PLANET, and as we've seen, it didn't hold me up much. Very workaroundable. I struggled a little with CAKESICLES (3D: "Sticky" birthday treats?) largely because those are relatively modern inventions—no birthday party I ever went to had them. Just serve cake! I know, forks,  plates, whatever, but if you think the cake-on-a-stick thing is going to be any less messy, then ... you aren't familiar with the party-eating habits of small children. I can't imagine wanting to eat a cakesicle. Also, aren't they called CAKE POPs?? What is the difference? Hmm, looks like CAKE POPs imitate a lollipop and CAKESICLES are more like popsicles. The fact that both forms being imitated have "pop" in their names is not helping. Anyway, the distinction seems to be a matter of shape and stick type. And that's what the clue is trying to pun on, by the way—"sticky" refers to the "stick" through the center of the CAKESICLES, not the fact that CAKESICLES are "sticky" as in "gooey and messy," which may or may not be true.

Bullets:

• 33A: "Neato!" ("OH, COOL"!) — No. "Neato!" = "COOL!" There's nothing really cluing the "OH" part. Dislike. 
• 44A: Place to get "pawmpered," say (PET SPA) — first of all, if crosswords didn't tell me so on a seemingly weekly basis, I'm not sure I'd know PET SPAs (or DOGSPAS or CATSPAWS or FERRETSPAS) existed (I made that last one up ... or did I?) (I did). Second, that's an awful pun. I don't mean "awful" as in "a groaner," I mean it doesn't work. It doesn't sound right. You're going to pawmper your dog? Sounds like you're going to beat it with some kind of miniature sledgehammer. "Come on, Fluffy, time to get pawmpered" [dog hides]. The vowel sound is so different that you lose the pun. I guess it's more of a visual pun? Those ... aren't as good.
• 6D: Symbol use in summation (SIGMA) — very mathy/chessy puzzle (SIGMA, UNSOLVED, FOOLSMATE). Not for me, but possibly for you.
• 65A: What some streakers are charged with? (TASERS) — I guess this is supposed to be funny, but somehow police using truly excessive violence on someone pulling an ultimately harmless prank doesn't make me chuckle. Real grim "joke" clue. 
• 55A: Product of manscaping (NAIR) — really, really hate the "of" here. A product of manscaping is something created by manscaping. Like ... I dunno, what do they call that little hairway path running from your bellybutton ... downward? "Trail of Tears?" No, that's not it. "Glory ... path?" Gah. It has a name! Aha, found it: "happy trail!" LOL, Trail of Tears—I was close! Anyway, NAIR is a product for manscaping. It's a manscaping product. It is not a product "of manscaping." Boo. [Update: I have no idea how, but I misread the clue; my the clue is actually [Product for manscaping] and my printout actually reads [Product for manscaping] but somehow I read "for" as "of" and it stuck so bad that I continued to believe it was "of" even as I wrote about it ... sometimes I worry about myself. Anyway, boo to me, not the clue! And maybe you learned something about abdominal hair along the way!]

Happy trails, FOLKs. See you next time.

Signed, Rex Parker, King of CrossWorld

[Follow Rex Parker on BlueSky and Facebook and Letterboxd]
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