Rex Parker Does the NYT Crossword Puzzle: "The Da Vinci Code" albino

Constructor: David Quarfoot

Relative difficulty: Hard

THEME: Earmuffs!

Word of the Day: SEX TOYS (11D: Stock in an adult store) —

A sex toy is an object or device that is primarily used to facilitate human sexual pleasure. Many popular sex toys are designed to resemble human genitals and may be vibrating or non-vibrating. The term can also include BDSM apparatus and sex furniture such as slings, however it is not applied to items such as birth control, pornography, or condoms.
(Wikipedia)

• • •

Hey, SethG here again, filling in while Rex and the gang are in Brooklyn for the ACPT.

So, how do I write about this puzzle? Cannot...must...resist...the urge to...4th grade boys...PORNSTAR (40D: Actor who might grin and bare it?).

You know how sometimes some of the commenters use words from the puzzle to weave together a story that's really just an attempt to incorporate as many words from the puzzle as possible in a story? You know, something about taking your chicken to the store to buy some licorice and a soccer ball and you stop at the mosh pit to tat some lace with Fabio and Carol Channing or something? Well, I defy those commenters to find anything coherent to say here.

Story elements:

Yoko ONO (61D: Conceptual art pioneer) reading the Marquis DE SADE (49D: "In order to know virtue, we must first acquaint ourselves with vice" speaker).
A LATE DATE (62A: Time near the end of a time range) on the
DOWN LOW (43D: Secrecy, with "the")
with a PORN STAR.
SEX TOYS.
POT SMOKE (1A: High clouds?)
and POPping A PILL (1D: Medicate oneself, say).
Somethings must be SOWED (52A: Spread).
Someone must PRAISE GOD (46A: Hands-in-the-air phrase).
Ang LEE (35A: "Brokeback Mountain" director) will direct.
We'll call it ODE TO MAN (65A: Sophocles tribute that begins "Numberless are the world's wonders ...")
AND...SCENE (41D: Director's cutoff).

But your story won't make any sense. No, no sense at all.
Here's a 1985 video:

David Quarfoot is so good.

Aside from the mental story, this was actually very difficult. Much trickier cluing than yesterday, lots of one-word clues, with some flashy entries and some yuckier stuff (STEROL. ILEA. A few others.) to hold it together.

Bullets:

PPPS is a (23A: Thought after an after-afterthought: Abbr.), while PPPs is more than one PPP. In other words, PPPPPP (46D: Rare dynamic marking seen in Tchaikovsky's Sixth Symphony). Heh. He said, "P".
I don't know anyone who wears ERMINES (8D: Fur sources). I don't know anyone who wears OTTER (6D: Fur source). Gross.
I guess if Fantasia is stuff from fantasy, and Oceania is stuff from the ocean, REALIA might be (47D: Objects from everyday life). And this sentence is blogia.
REBEL YELL was a (30A: War cry of the '60s). The 1860s. I was gonna make a comment about how it's also a reference to Ole Miss and how their basketball team was upset yesterday in the tournament, but that was Missouri. (Also, Duke. And Michigan.)

Here's another 1985 video:
UPA (39A: ___ tree) used to be the Ultimate Players Association, but now it's USA Ultimate. And the original Frisbee was a PIE TIN (64A: It might have a crust). DISCUS (9A: Ancient pentathlon event)!