Ionian Sea vacation isle / WED 3-6-13 / 2000s Vienna state Opera conductor / Caesar of old TV / Rombauer of cookery / Built-in feature of Apple II / yalie's cheer word / Light tennis shots that fall just over net / Fenway nine on scoreboards

Constructor: Richard Chisholm

Relative difficulty: Medium

THEME: tic tac toe — theme answers all have three consecutive Os in them

Theme answers:

• 18A: Lacks pizzazz (HAS NO OOMPH)
• 26A: Overly partisan (TOO ONE-SIDED)
• 47A: Animal on display (ZOO OCCUPANT)
• 61A: Inuit, maybe (IGLOO OWNER) 

Word of the Day: DOS (44D: Built-in feature of the Apple II) —

Apple DOS refers to operating systems for the Apple II series of microcomputers from late 1978 through early 1983. Apple DOS had three major releases: DOS 3.1, DOS 3.2, and DOS 3.3; each one of these three releases was followed by a second, minor "bug-fix" release, but only in the case of Apple DOS 3.2 did that minor release receive its own version number, Apple DOS 3.2.1. The best-known and most-used version was Apple DOS 3.3 in the 1980 and 1983 releases. Prior to the release of Apple DOS 3.1, Apple users had to rely on audio cassette tapes for data storage and retrieval, but that method was notoriously slow, inconvenient and unreliable. (wikipedia)

• • •

Did not like this one at all. Those aren't real phrases. They're totally arbitrary, and I can think of scores off the top of my head that might work just as well. STARTS TO OOZE. BOO ORIOLES. SWITCH TO OOLONG. KANGAROO OMELET. I mean, really, ZOO OCCUPANT? The chimps aren't on a year-to-year lease. Fill is OK on this one, but the absurd theme answers made the whole thing rather unpalatable. I was a little on the slow side today, but not remarkably so. Most of my slowness came from my expecting the theme answers to be real things, and then remembering "oh, right. The theme." I liked BLEW OFF a lot, though it took me a ridiculously long time to come up with it. I may have gone with BLED OFF first, thinking it some kind of Briticism. I'm not familiar with the rank of LT. GEN., though I've likely seen it in puzzles before, so that took some piecing together. I had no idea what DOS had to do with Apple. I think of MS/DOS as an IBM thing. I'd've gone with DOC there and then, to avoid CHAD duplication, changed CHAD to CHAR or CHAN or something. Maybe CHAP and then change DICE to PIKE or PINE. I'd've killed DOS as subpar fill, is what I'm saying. I had MEHTA conducting the 2000s Vienna State Opera at first (it's OZAWA) (27D: 2000s Vienna state Opera conductor). Otherwise, I a pretty normal Wednesday at the office.


Got PAPA DOC early (and loved it) (20A: Former Haitian leader Duvalier), but took Forever to see THREADS (22A: Clothing, slangily). It was a weird day for not seeing fairly obvious stuff (see BLEW OFF, above). Would've taken a while to get CORFU (16A: Ionian Sea vacation isle) if I hadn't had the -FU before ever seeing the clue. Misread 21D: Light tennis shots that fall just over the net (DINKS) as singular, and so couldn't figure it out. But for all these little mistakes there was at least one flat-out gimme. IRMA (11D: Rombauer of cookery) and SFPD (12D: "Bullitt" law enforcement org.) made the NE a cinch. IMUS helped out in the center (23A: Radio host who often wears cowboy hats). Misspelled SID as SYD (24D: Caesar of old TV). I am now just cataloguing ordinary ticky-tack mistakes, so I'll stop. I'm headed to NYC tomorrow, in advance of the ACPT in Brooklyn (which starts on Friday night). There will be subs filling in for me here while I'm gone, though I'm sure I'll pop in now and again. Have a lovely week.

Signed, Rex Parker, King of CrossWorld

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Homer Simpson's favorite meat item / MON 12-19-11 / Amazing magician / Tree-lined way in France

Constructor: Richard Chisholm

Relative difficulty: Easy

THEME: "We" — first words of theme answers are all homophones

Word of the Day: RANDI (48A: "Amazing" magician) —

James Randi (born Randall James Hamilton Zwinge; August 7, 1928) is a Canadian-American stage magician and scientific skeptic best known as a challenger of paranormal claims and pseudoscience. Randi is the founder of the James Randi Educational Foundation (JREF). Randi began his career as a magician named The Amazing Randi, but after retiring at age 60, he began investigating paranormal, occult, and supernatural claims, which he collectively calls "woo-woo." (wikipedia)

• • •

[FOR MY READERS IN SYNDICATION: It's pledge week here at the Rex Parker site (thru Sat.) —read my pitch for donations in the opening paragraphs of Sunday's write-up, here ... and thanks for your faithful readership (and the many kind messages I've received so far)]

• • •

Seen it.

Once, from the back end, here.

And again, earlier (before WII was invented), in the New York Sun (June '06)—theme answers WEE WILLIE WINKIE, OUI MONSIEUR, and WE SHALL OVERCOME. This is the kind of stuff you're supposed to check before embarking on a puzzle.

Blew through this like it wasn't there until the very very end when I lost precious seconds in the southwest. Took me a couple beats to get the front end of -CONSOLE (GAME wouldn't fit, then the theme dawned on me). Then I ran into the WIT / WAG issue (54D: Joker). Correctly went with WAG, but then erased it when I saw [Pond swimmers] would then start with "G." Must be WIT / TOADS, I reasoned. So, yeah, I hate the idea of GEESE as "swimmers" (though, of course, they are). I also hate the definition on CONDONE (40D: Overlook, as something that's illegal), a word that strongly implies approval or endorsement, not mere overlooking. I see that "overlook" is listed as a synonym in places, but I still think it sucks as a definition. Anyway, just that little hiccup there kept me from getting under 3 minutes.




I like "GIVE IT A TRY" (3D: Encouragement after "Go on") and PORK CHOP (39A: Homer Simpson's favorite meat item). You can have the rest of the puzzle back.

Theme answers:

• 18A: Young girls in Glasgow (WEE LASSIES)
• 26A: First words of the Constitution ("WE THE PEOPLE...")
• 43A: Polite assent in Paris (OUI, MONSIEUR)
• 54A: Piece of Nintendo game equipment (WII CONSOLE)

Signed, Rex Parker, King of CrossWorld

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Yiddish writer Sholem / MON 12-6-10 / Funnywoman Boosler / Zoot-suiter's Got it / Rorem who composed opera Our Town / WW II correspondent Pyle

Constructor: Richard Chisholm

Relative difficulty: Easy

THEME: SHH (51D: Library admonition) (x2) — 6 theme answers are two-word phrases where both words start with "SH-"


Word of the Day: NED Rorem (5D: Rorem who composed the opera "Our Town") —

Ned Rorem (born October 23, 1923) is a Pulitzer prize-winning American composer and diarist. He is best known and most praised for his song settings. (wikipedia)

• • •

Pretty thin. Theme density is great, but when the theme's not that interesting, then you've just got dense uninterestingness. I tore through this like it wasn't there, which it almost isn't The theme is bland and the short fill is pretty weak (ESE, SSE, EWES, REA, ANERA, AMA, OTO, etc.). The bright spots are the long Downs (SMART MONEY, "TELL ME MORE...") — wonderful, vivid colloquialisms (11D: Wagers from those in the know + 28D: "Go on ...") — and the weird central Across (PART III), which I should hate but don't (39A: Last installment of "The Godfather"). Simplicity and triteness of the short stuff made this puzzle very easy to tear through — get an Across at the top of a section and just drop the Downs into place, bam bam bam. That's how I started — CAJUN (1A: Native Louisianan) + every one of its Down crosses in rapid succession — and some version of that method worked several other times throughout the grid. Feels like a grid that was made without the aid of software — fill is old-feeling, and there's an over-reliance on Es and Rs and Ss and other common letters. That lone "Z" really stands out against the sea of 1-pt Scrabble tiles. I made my first puzzles without the aid of software, and it was tough, and the fill just wasn't as interesting as it might have been if a computer had helped me see other possibilities. Most constructors now use some version of Crossword Compiler (or, for Macs, Crossfire); software can't give you good ideas, but it can help you make your good ideas into really good puzzles.

Theme answers:

• 18A: In good order (SHIP SHAPE)
  
• 23A: Annie Oakley, for one (SHARP SHOOTER)
  
• 30A: Combat stress (SHELL SHOCK)
  
• 44A: Pull a bed prank (SHORT SHEET)
  
• 49A: Wool gatherer (SHEEP SHEARER) — really wish this answer had been HARRY SHEARER [Voice of Mr. Burns, and many other characters, on "The Simpsons"], but obviously that would have been a theme-breaker.
  

• 61A: Bootblack's service (SHOE SHINE)
  

Bullets:

• 48A: Funnywoman Boosler (ELAYNE) — an oddly common six-letter answer. That weird "Y" placement gets her a lot of action.
  
• 7D: Zoot-suiter's "Got it!" ("I'M HEP") — this raises the question: what's the difference between zoot-suiter slang and beatnik slang?

[*People* magazine!? Version I know has *Playboy* — funnier]

• 43D: One on the Statue o Liberty is almost three feet long (TOE) — man, that is one big TOE.
  
• 53D: W.W. II correspondent Pyle (ERNIE) — really famous war correspondent who died in combat in 1945. His writings appeared in hundreds of newspapers nationwide.
  

Signed, Rex Parker, King of CrossWorld

[Follow Rex Parker on Twitter]

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Group with 1951 hit Tell Me Why / TUE 11-23-10 / Broadway singer/actress Verdon / Upscale London district / Indy quick-change artists

Constructor: Richard Chisholm

Relative difficulty: Medium

THEME: POKER HAND (65A: What the answer to each starred clue is) — POKER HANDs are clued in punny / wacky ways ... actually, no, one is clued that way, the others are clued literally, just not in reference to POKER ...


Word of the Day: MAYFAIR (38D: Upscale London district) —

Mayfair is an area of central London, England, within the City of Westminster. // Mayfair is named after the annual fortnight-long May Fair that took place on the site that is Shepherd Market today (from 1686 until it was banned in that location in 1764). Until 1686, the May Fair was held in Haymarket, and after 1764, it moved to Fair Field in Bow because the well-to-do residents of the area felt the fair 'lowered the tone' of the neighbourhood. [...] The district is now mainly commercial, with many offices in converted houses and new buildings, including major corporate headquarters, a concentration of hedge funds,real estate businesses and many different embassy offices, namely the U.S.'s large office taking up all the west side of of Grosvenor Square. Rents are among the highest in London and the world. There remains a substantial quantity of residential property as well as some exclusive shopping and London's largest concentration of luxury hotels and many restaurants. Buildings in Mayfair include the United States embassy in Grosvenor Square, the Royal Academy of Arts, The Handel House Museum, the Grosvenor House Hotel, Claridge's and The Dorchester. // The renown and prestige of Mayfair has grown in the popular mind due to its designation as the most expensive property on the British Monopoly set. (wikipedia)

• • •

Write-up will be delayed 'til late morning, EST. Feel free to comment on the puzzle now, if you like.

~RP

OK, I'm back from early a.m. appt. No time to write last night, no time to write this a.m., hence the (highly unusual) delay. I didn't really have much (nice) to say about this puzzle anyway, so no real loss (to you, to me, to the world at large). HOW ELSE? (18D: "Do you have a better idea?") bugged me so much that I sort of gave up on the puzzle halfway through. Fill is generally ordinary to trite. Never heard of the FOUR ACES, so that was weird. SMEARY is (as commenters have said) less than desirable. IRED always sucks. I always admire dense themes, esp. with intersecting theme answers, but did Not like the clue on ROYAL FLUSH (*Sound from a palace bathroom?) — they should all be punny or all not be punny. The other clues are simply literal, so ... boo. Best part about the puzzle is bonus theme answer "IT'S A DEAL" (56A: "Agreed!").

Theme answers:

• 17A: *What SRO indicates (FULL HOUSE)
  
• 27A: *The Magi, e.g. (THREE KINGS)
  
• 50A: *Sound from a palace bathroom? (ROYAL FLUSH)
  
• 10D: *Group with the 1951 hit "Tell Me Why," with "The" (FOUR ACES)
  
• 40D: *Makeup of a double date (TWO PAIRS)
  

See you tomorrow,

Signed, Rex Parker, King of CrossWorld

[Follow Rex Parker on Twitter]

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Collins on Op-Ed page / MON 8-30-10 / Video game maker owns Seattle Mariners / Actress/director May / 1960s world chess champion Mikhail *

Constructor: Richard Chisholm

Relative difficulty: Medium

THEME: TWO HANDS (59A: Things a clock has ... or, literally, what 17-, 25-, 35- and 50-Across are) — theme answers are two-word phrases where both words can precede HAND in a familiar phrase or word


Word of the Day: GAIL Collins (39D: Collins on the Op-Ed page) —

Gail Gleason Collins (born November 25, 1945) is an American journalist, op-ed columnist and author, most recognized for her work with the New York Times. Joining the Times in 1995 as a member of the editorial board, from 2001 to 2007 she served as the paper's Editorial Page Editor – the first woman to attain that position. Collins presently authors a semi-weekly op-ed column for the Times, published Thursdays and Saturdays. (wikipedia)

• • •

This one was not terribly exciting. First, TWO HANDS ... is not really a zippy phrase. At all. The best revealers can stand alone — phrases that have been adapted in some surprising way. Today, TWO HANDS—and the clue isn't accurate: "literally?" OFF is not "literally" a HAND. STAGE is not "literally" a HAND. They aren't even *types* of hands. They are *only* words that can *precede* hand in a familiar word/phrase (actually, HAND can come before or after OFF). Bigger problem, though: the theme answers just ... lie there. They are adequate as phrases go, and certainly fulfill their duty, but there is zero wow factor. In cases like this, it is crucial for the overall fill to be smooth, if not brilliant. Today, neither. So much tired short stuff. I mean, we start with two abbrevs. (PJS, SFPD) and end up getting a bunch more, including the dire TREAS. (51D: Club finance officer: Abbr.). Then there's the dreaded E-CASH (32D: Online money) crossing odd partial A SORE, the now "facetious" (read: mildly racist) "AH SO" crossing foreign UNIS on top of foreign ESTO. That SW corner is a mess—is that really the best fill that could go in that chunk of space. In addition to TREAS, there's the lowly TSETSE and the loathsome INANER. AGLARE's clue made both me and wife go "???" (45D: Blazing). Plus the unlovely AGAS up top there. It all feels just a little ... lazy. Once we get to 6+ letters, things perk up a bit (love FISHEYE, for example; 26D: Kind of lens with a wide angle). But [deep breath] WOOER CPO ENIAC APER ETH OTOS AGAS ILIE SITU SROS TAL NIA SOL etc. just dominate the grid to too great an extent today, smothering the interesting but not terribly lively theme.

Theme answers:

• 17A: Where Claudius is during Hamlet's "To be, or not to be" soliloquy (OFF STAGE)
  
• 25A: Any time now (BEFORE LONG)
  
• 35A: Extra plateful (SECOND HELPING)
  
• 50A: Position for Babe Ruth (RIGHT FIELD)
  

Interesting set of people in the grid today. Never heard of GAIL Collins. This pretty much tells you that I subscribe to the NYT puzzle, but not the dead-tree paper itself. I'm vaguely aware of a host of names from the NYT Op-Ed page. Hers is not one of them. Not complaining at all, just noting that sometimes, even on Mondays, the puzzle can introduce you to something new. I always forget which spelling of ELAINE (12D: Actress/director May) goes with which ELAYNE (May vs. Boosler), so I had to double-check that cross. I know Mikhail TAL (53A: 1960s chess champion Mikhail ___) only from crosswords, and even then, only barely. Still, he's likely the most famous TAL in existence, though I know one-hit wonder TAL Bachmann better:



Bullets:

• 38D: Video game maker that owns the Seattle Mariners (NINTENDO) — weird to think of an owner as non-human. Surely there is a human being who functions in that role. Or maybe not. Maybe that's why the Mariners are perennial superunderachievers (Free Ichiro!)
  

Signed, Rex Parker, King of CrossWorld

[Follow Rex Parker on Twitter]

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1910s-'20s flivver — MONDAY, Oct. 12 2009 — Broadway songwriter Jule / Title bear of 1960s TV / Lenten treat

Constructor: Richard Chisholm

Relative difficulty: Challenging (for a Monday)

THEME: another (not-so-great) vowel shift — from BAN to BUN through all the vowels

Word of the Day: Flivver (44A: 1910s-'20s flivver => MODEL T) — n. Slang

An automobile, especially one that is small, inexpensive, and old.

[Origin unknown.]

-----

Wow, was I on the wrong end of a generation divide today. Yipes. I have never seen so many Monday answers I flat-out didn't know. Four. At least four that were not just tough to get, but utter mysteries to me (though I'm nearly certain all of them have been in some puzzle I've done, somewhere, before). But there was other stuff that made the puzzle seem not just tough, but weak. First, the theme itself, which is about as tired a concept as there is in Puzzle Land. "C'EST SI BON" is weak as an answer, esp. as clued (i.e. completely unimaginatively, as a literal translation). Why not this?




Probably because it would have made the puzzle even harder than it already was (for a Monday), but it's already skewing hard (for people born after WWII), why not at least put a good clue on the answer. IS INTO and IS OUT? Boo. OTT and ORR? Double boo. D'OR? Blecch. ARE SO? I had AREN'T in that slot (20A: "You _____ wrong!"), which makes only slightly less sense to me than the real answer. AWW is, as one of my Twitter followers exclaimed, "egregious" (5D: Exclamation before "How cute!"). Esp. ugly right next to "random Roman numeral" (LII).

But as I've said, the ugliness of the puzzle wasn't a big obstacle to solving. It was the TAFT-era sensibility of the puzzle that left me on the outside looking in."Flivver" is known only to very old people, car experts, and crossword experts whose memories are better than mine. Jeez louise. Other stuff that eluded me: GALBA (27D: Emperor after Nero)? No idea. STYNE (29D: Broadway songwriter Jule)? Uh uh. Felt slightly, vaguely familiar, but not familiar enough. I thought I'd never hear of "LILI Marlene" (34A: "_____ Marlene" (W.W. II song)), but a. I think it's been in a puzzle somewhere before, and b. when I complained about the answer to my wife, she said "Oh I knew that. You know that. I know you know it because it's in that Leonard Cohen song ... 'Famous Blue Raincoat.'" Me: "He's saying 'Lili Marlene?!' I never knew what he was saying." I didn't tell her that in my head I was thinking "... you mean he's not singing 'Lillum or Lane?' I just thought Lillum and Lane were two guys he knew." Every single one of the answers I didn't know is totally valid. I just wouldn't expect to see any of them (let alone FOUR of them) on a Monday. So it took me 4+ minutes to solve. I'll survive.





Theme answers:

• 18A: Likely result of pollution along a beach (swimming ban) — right away, not the zippiest-feeling theme answer. Why is this "likely?" I'm guessing in most of the world it is highly unlikely.
• 23A: Title bear of 1960s TV (Gentle BEN) — about as close to my sweet spot as any answer got today, and it barely caught the corner.
• 41A: Receptacle for some donations (used clothing BIN) — I'm not fully convinced this is a thing.
• 54A: "It's so good," in Paris ("C'est si bon")
• 62A: Lenten treat (hot cross BUN)

Bullets:

• 15A: Sting, in baby talk (owie) — AWW, an OWIE. Why "sting?" Come on, pick a less ambiguous word. Me: "Why would a baby be talking about a sting (operation)?"
• 40D: "Aha!" ("I get it!") — mocking me.
• 58D: Citi Field player, for short (NY Met) — ugh. Just ugh. No no no. Google it (in quotation marks). Only the opera gets referred to this way.

I have to stop now. But one last thing: thanks to everyone who wrote and asked about the stray basset hound and Jack Russell terrier that we took in for a night last week. After a couple of days, the following notice appeared in the paper:


We called all relevant parties last night and got no reply, but it looks nearly certain that the outcome here is going to be perfect: dogs back with original owners. And now my wife (whose birthday is Wednesday) wants a Jack Russell puppy. She thought she hated small dogs. Turns out that's the opposite of true.



Signed, Rex Parker, King of CrossWorld

[Follow Rex Parker on Twitter]

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Big Cup maker — WEDNESDAY, Sep. 9 2009 — Colossus locale / Art show that might feature Fish Magic / Unmerciful Athenian lawgiver

Constructor: Richard Chisholm


Relative difficulty: Easy-Medium

THEME: EEES (25D: Some shoes ... and a feature of this puzzle's theme) — five theme answers all feature three consecutive E's

Word of the Day: ROSELLE Park, N.J. (27D: _____ Park, N.J.) — Roselle Park is a borough in Union County, New Jersey, United States. As of the United States 2000 Census, the borough population was 13,281. [...] Roselle Park has a rich railroading heritage. A steam locomotive adorns the Borough seal, and the town is very welcoming to railroad enthusiasts. It all began when zzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzz (wikipedia, except the z's, which are all me ... should this place be known to anyone outside its immediate geographical area, i.e. the northern N.J. / NYC area?)
-----

I wrote this on Twitter last night: "You know what I like in my puzzles: lots and lots of Es. Always exciting. Can't have too many." That pretty much says all I have to say today, but I'm going to go on anyway. EEES is, itself, an ugly answer, and it's arbitrarily placed in the grid. Some of the theme answers are nice, self-standing phrases; others (KLEE EXHIBIT?) aren't. Mostly, this is a fine, ordinary puzzle, but the E obsession is mystifying, in that it fills your grid with the deadliest (i.e. most common) of letters. The only thing worse (possibly) would have been a grid chock full of ESSES (29D: Some hook shapes). Also, I feel like I've seen the triple-E theme before. And I wish just two more squares (one in the NE, one in the SW) were white instead of black. Maybe a couple more long Downs (which those white squares would have created) would have livened things up a bit. EWE (53D: 12-Down producer) next to EWERS (52D: Still-life pieces) isn't helping.

The last month has seen a marked dip in overall puzzle quality (with some notable exceptions). I don't really understand what's going on, but I hope it stops soon. I hope it's just end-of-summer doldrums.

Theme answers:

• 17A: Arborists (tree experts) — hey, I know one of these.
• 24A: Capitalism (free enterprise)
• 40A: Disagree (don't see eye to eye)
• 50A: Tuneful Ford (Tennessee Ernie)
• 62A: Art show that might feature "Fish Magic" (Klee exhibit)

Bullets:

• 11A: Smoked fare (BBQ) — BBQ season is winding down ...
• 14A: J. Lo title role (Selena) — always want to call her SERENA.
• 15A: Common command in Basic programming (go to) — takes me back to 9th grade computer science. 10 years before the internets went worldwide.
• 31A: Margaret Mitchell family (O'Haras) — backwards, it spells SARAH O.
• 35A: Allen and Coen (Ethans) — more plural names, huzzah. I wants JOELS here at first. There's a JOEL Allen, right? Hmmm, no. Maybe I was thinking of JOEL Gray.

• 71A: Colossus locale (Rhodes) — Whence the term "Rhodes scholar." Or so I'm guessing. I'm no RHODES scholar, so I prefer guessing to looking things up. [OK, people are already taking me seriously and writing me earnest notes about Cecil Rhodes, etc. ... I Was Not Being Serious. How high does the facetious-o-meter have to be set?]
  
• 2D: Times Roman typeface feature (serif) — lots of discussion with PuzzleGirl about SERIF and sans SERIF fonts as we redesign this website (coming soon ... for real this time).
• 4D: Big Cup maker (Reese's) — really would have liked a bra manufacturer here.
• 8D: "What hath God wrought" sender (Morse) — he had a code.
• 23D: Unmerciful Athenian lawgiver (Draco) — got my Athenian lawgivers mixed up (it happens) and wrote in SOLON.
• 49D: Roy G. Biv part (indigo) — talk about your My Lai massacres. Or should I say MY LAY — because that's how I spelled it, leading me to enter YELLOW for [Roy G. Giv part].

Signed, Rex Parker, King of CrossWorld

[Follow Rex Parker on Twitter]

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TUESDAY, Mar. 17, 2009 - R Chisholm (1940s hit radio show featuring bartender Archie / Pakistani leader 1977-88 / Ferrara ruling family)

Relative difficulty: Challenging

THEME: Obliquely saluting the Irish - five theme answers all begin with possessive forms of a conventionally Irish names; the theme is intended as a "salute" to ERIN (57D: Land that's saluted in this puzzle)

Word of the Day: GSA (38D: Fed. property overseer) - General Services Administration: sets policy for and manages government property and records. More specifically, the GSA's duties include the construction and operation of buildings; procurement and distribution of supplies; utilization and disposal of property; management of transportation, traffic, and communications; and management of the government's automatic data processing resources program. (answers.com)

How to salute the Irish on St. Patrick's Day? Well, first, start in a TAVERN. They love that. Then trot out their traditional heroes, like ... that incompetent boob who was shipwrecked for the better part of a decade, or ... that irrepressible prisoner of war who was played by an "avid amateur pornographer" who was later bludgeoned to death. Yes, that'll do. Happy St. Patrick's Day!


This was a good day for (very) old people. None of the theme answers dates from after 1970, and three of them date back to the pre-television era. 30s, 40s, 40s, 60s, 60s. "DUFFY'S TAVERN" and "MCNAMARA'S BAND" were absolutely unknown to me. I got to the DUFFY part of that answer quickly and then realized it was going to be a (relatively) long solve. My wife challenged me to name Anyone named "DUFFY" last night, and I couldn't, though this morning Patrick DUFFY came to me as soon as I got out of bed. He played that guy from "Dallas" ... who dreamed an entire season. There's a contemporary singer named "DUFFY," but since she just has one name, like CHER or MADONNA, I wasn't sure there was anything particularly Irish about her.

Theme answers:

• 20A: 1940s hit radio show featuring the bartender Archie ("Duffy's Tavern") - when I think of "taverns," I think MOE'S. When I think of a guy named "Archie" in a "tavern," I think "All in the Family" "Archie" is also the nickname of Doug Dreiberg's "owl-ship" in "Watchmen" (short for "Archimedes"), in case anyone ever asks you.
• 28A: 1939 James Joyce novel ("Finnegans Wake")
• 36A: 1960s sitcom about a group of castaways ("Gilligan's Island")
• 44A: 1946 Bing Crosby hit ("McNamara's Band")

[Not Bing Crosby]

• 51A: 1960s sitcom set in a P.O.W. camp ("Hogan's Heroes")

The personal pronoun "I" is in this puzzle three times. Is there a limit?

• NO I (32D: "_____ won't!")
• I TOO (62A: "Am _____ late?") - usually clued as a Langston Hughes poem
• I AM SO (37D: Schoolyard retort)

There are more black squares in this puzzle than I have seen in a puzzle in ages. I consider 42 pretty high. Most early-mid-week puzzles have 38 or 40. This one has 46. This makes the grid Very easy to fill, and means, in this case, that there are No Long Downs. Grid becomes very boring very quickly (outside of the theme answers). The one part of the grid I do like is the GUMP DISCO FELONS part, primarily for the jarring incongruity. (36D: Forrest _____, 1994 Oscar-winning role + 33D: Establishement with a revolving mirrored ball + 28D: Prison population).

Bullets:

• 35A: Pakistani leader 1977-88 (Zia) - completely unknown to me. "General Muhammad Zia-ul-Haq (Arabic: محمد ضياء الحق‎) (b. August 12, 1924–August 17, 1988) was the president and military ruler of Pakistan from July 1977 to his death in August 1988." (wikipedia)
• 50A: Sculler's item (oar) - Crew being one of the more popular sports in CrossWorld
• 66A: Jew traditionally dressed in a black coat and hat (Hasid) - had a conversation with my barber (!?!?) about HASIDs just the other day. I have no idea how it could have come up. Something about hair, I'm sure.
• 6D: Ado (bustle) - here was the source of my major slowdown. I had TUSSLE, which made both BASE (6A: Contemptible) and DUFFY'S TAVERN very hard to see. I later changed TUSSLE to BUSSLE, forgetting that that is not a valid spelling of the word.
• 60D: Instrument famously played by Bill Clinton on "The Arsenio Hall Show" (sax) - nothing says "early 90s" better than this clue. The SAX is also Lisa Simpson's instrument.
  

Signed, Rex Parker, King of CrossWorld

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TUESDAY, Nov. 18, 2008 - Richard Chisholm (The Cowardly Lion's Kansas counterpart / Ohio political dynasty / Sporty 1980s Pontiac)

Relative difficulty: Easy-Medium

THEME: TWO HOUSES (59A: What 17-, 23-, 34-, 40- and 47-Across are each composed of) - theme answers are each made up of two words, both of which can precede "HOUSE" in a (reasonably) common phrase

Never heard of a BLOCK House. "BLOCK house" appears to have several meanings. It's the name of a specific fort built in Delaware in the 17th century as a defense against the local Indians. It's also "A brokerage whose major concern is finding potential buyers and sellers of block trades" (answers.com). The main meaning appears to be an isolated fort built as a defensive stronghold (like the Delaware "Block House"). Thankfully, I didn't need to know what a BLOCK House was in order to solve the puzzle. It would have been cool if TWO HOUSES were a real phrase ... sooooo close to the opening two words of "Romeo and Juliet":

Two households, both alike in dignity,
In fair Verona, where we lay our scene,
From ancient grudge break to new mutiny,
Where civil blood makes civil hands unclean.
From forth the fatal loins of these two foes
A pair of star-cross'd lovers take their life;
Whole misadventured piteous overthrows
Do with their death bury their parents' strife.
The fearful passage of their death-mark'd love,
And the continuance of their parents' rage,
Which, but their children's end, nought could remove,
Is now the two hours' traffic of our stage;
The which if you with patient ears attend,
What here shall miss, our toil shall strive to mend.

If only there was such a thing as a BRICK WHORE - now there's a theme answer:



Theme answers:

• 17A: Police stop (road block)
• 23A: Remedy for failed courses, maybe (summer school)
• 34A: Cardinal vis-a-vis Illinois, Indiana or Ohio (state bird)
• 40A: Military capability (fire power)
• 47A: Wheeled toy (doll carriage)

I actually found the NW corner a bit tough - which, on a Tuesday, is to say that it wasn't a breeze. The clue on 1A: Touch base again (tag up) sounds like figurative speech meaning "get in touch with again," so I didn't put anything down at first, and I instinctively wanted a RE- word. ADLAI (13A: 1940s-'50s politico Stevenson) was, like ETNA in the SW (54D: 11,000-foot Italian peak), FAY in the W (37A: Wray of "King Kong"), etc.) a gimme, but GLEAM (3D: Glimmer) wanted to be GLINT, and I needed many crosses to get PIONEER (5D: NASA program that explored the outer planets). I haven't seen (or thought about) a Pontiac FIERO since the 80s (16A: Sporty 1980s Pontiac), but it came back from the past without too much effort. The weirdest moment in this corner was seeing 1D: Ohio political dynasty and instantly, half-jokingly, writing in TAFTS (the correct answer, it turns out). I guess my brain has finally hard-wired the TAFT/Ohio connection. Didn't know the TAFTS were a "dynasty," though I would finally subscribe to HBO if they would do a series called "The Tafts" in the style of TV's "Dynasty."

[What is Crystal wearing!?]

Assorted other answers:

• 27A: Lacking pizazz (anemic) - Why oh why is PIZAZZ spellable with either three or four Z's? M-W online has this three-Z version listed as a variant. ANEMIC is a nice, interesting answer as is NO SLOUCH (38D: A pretty capable person), which somehow seems related (opposed) to ANEMIC.
• 67A: Fair Deal president, for short (HST) - "Deal" part had me writing in "FDR" without thinking. "New Deal," "Fair Deal," "Great Society" - conservatives hate (or at least dislike) all of these because they expanded the role of the Federal Government in American life. I just now wondered where the promise of a "chicken in every pot" came from, and found out it was Hoover. I guess these were magical, non-governmental, and possibly invisible chickens he was talking about.
• 12D: The Cowardly Lion's Kansas counterpart (Zeke) - HA ha. I complained about the original clue, and got this - which (to me) is just as obscure. Probably less obscure to others, though. Originally clued as cager Isiah Thomas's nickname.
• 32D: Follower, as in espionage (tail) - great cluing here
• 48D: Old Apple computers (Lisas) - really, one of the worst imaginable computer names. I'm of the belief that you do not give hardware people names. The name "Lisa" is lovely (and Lisa Simpson is my hero), but on a computer? No.

Signed, Rex Parker, King of CrossWorld

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TUESDAY, Sep. 23, 2008 - Richard Chisholm (Query to a brown cow / Two-time Oscar winner Luise / Bygone school dance)

Relative difficulty: Medium

THEME: IN HOT WATER (61A: Where 17-, 29-, 36- and 44-Across often wind up)

Tight, cute theme. If only there were fewer black squares ... :) I rated this puzzle "Medium," but now can't quite remember what the rationale was. Seems very easy, though I think I had to wrestle with RAINER (18D: Two-time Oscar winner Luise), of whom I'd never heard. Also probably dropped in ERIN where EIRE belonged (39D: Home of County Clare). Oh, and then I blinked at "AS I DO" (56A: "Like me"), both because I just couldn't think of a phrase that fit, and then because when I got the phrase, I didn't trust it: there's another answer with the phrase "I DO" in it just one black square away. Seemed odd. Other than that, I think, piece of cake.

Theme answers:

• 17A: One risking arrest (law breaker)
• 29A: Some seers read them (tea leaves) - I put TEA LEAVES IN HOT WATER less than half an hour ago...
• 36A: Sink items (dirty dishes) - my sink is currently full of them
• 44A: Trattoria offering (spaghetti)

There are some good action words in this puzzle, like WRING (48A: Twist, as a wet cloth or a neck) and WALLOP (52A: Beat but good) and CLASH (25D: Lock horns). Even ASWARM (3D: Teeming as with bees) conveys motion, especially when placed next door to MOB (4D: Group with enforcers, with "the"). AIR WAVES (Radio hosts' medium) also conveys a sense of motion, but the use of the word "medium" in the clue threw me. Radio is a medium, with the idea of AIR WAVES built into it ... no? Anyway, the clue seems accurate, if odd. I was also a little thrown by GNARLY (51D: Very cool, in slang) when I first solved this puzzle, largely because the original clue (when I was test-solving) was completely different: [Distasteful, in slang]. That clue was true enough, but when I hear GNARLY in my head, this is the voice I hear:


The Rest:

• 22A: One of eight Eng. kings (Edw.) - well I don't like that abbrev., but since it's hot on the heels of another Eng. king (the "J" in K. J. V.), I'll call it a mini-theme and be done with it - 23A: The "V" in K. J. V. (Version).
• 64A: Santa _____ Derby (annual horse race) (Anita) - would have preferred a clue relating to any of these three ANITAs:

• 1D: Drool, basically (saliva) - gross.
• 8D: Glasgow denials (naes) - Och!
• 12D: Actress Caldwell (Zoe) - who is this? I feel like I ask this question every time this particular ZOE comes up. . . she's a stage actress who is not at all familiar to me. Wikipedia says her mother was a "taxi dancer," which is a phrase I want to see in a puzzle, like, tomorrow.
• 30D: Conclude by (end at) - seems off. Clue implies approximation, where answer implies precision.
• 67A: Note on a Chinese menu (No MSG) - nice consonant cluster
  
• 38D: Query to a brown cow ("How now?") - great answer. What is the origin of this phrase? Whoa, it's a nonsense phrase used to demonstrate rounded vowel sounds. And here I thought there was some olde timey cultural reference I was missing.
• 46D: Bygone school dance (hop) - as in ...

Signed, Rex Parker, King of CrossWorld

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MONDAY, Dec. 17, 2007 - Richard Chisholm

Relative difficulty: Challenging

THEME: Seasons, plural - every theme answer ends with a plural form of a season: SPRINGS, FALLS, SUMMERS, and WINTERS

First, I wish the seasons appeared in order. I'm just sayin'.

Second, holy mackerel this puzzle was difficult ... FOR A MONDAY. It took me just over 4 minutes, which by any standard is a respectable time, but I had many long pauses and furious re-typing sessions as I struggled over words that just would not come easily. I am not complaining about the struggle, just noting it. I do love a challenge, and anything that spices up a Monday puzzle is more than welcome.

Let's start with the theme, which I will complain about, for a couple reasons. First, two of the answers don't have very wide currency, and one of them I've seen very recently, though I cannot confirm where at the moment. And second, as I've said ... the seasons are out of order.

Theme answers:

• 17A: Upstate New York city and spa (Saratoga Springs) - I feel like I've seen this answer three times this year, at least twice in the NYT, and yet cursory searches turn up nothing. What the hell puzzle(s) am I thinking of? Little help? I think there's a race track here, but still, I contend that many folks, especially non-New Yorkers, don't know this place exists.
• 24A: Honeymooners' destination (Niagara Falls) - Another NY answer.
• 42A: Former president of Harvard (Larry Summers) - I know you think I'm just another Northeast liberal with an expensive education, but I swear to you that I've Never heard of this guy. Harvard Schmarvard. Not really on my radar. Trying to solve this answer, without any idea of the theme (I rarely notice the theme on Mondays), was awkward. I had BARRY at one point, and filled in ABBERANT for 35D: Broad-minded (tolerant) without ever looking at the clue. Two problems: ABBERANT is not a word, and even if it were, it would be a poor answer for the clue in question.
• 54A: Comic who played Robin Williams's son in "Mork & Mindy" (Jonathan Winters) - this clue is technically inaccurate. WINTERS played Mork's son, not Robin Williams's.

The hard stuff:

• 9A: Lesser-played half of a 45 (side B) - I can't be the only one who instinctively, instantly wrote in BSIDE.
• 14A: Elementary particle (muon) - seen it in late-week puzzles, I think, but it looks nuts here on a Monday. Thankfully, I never saw this clue.
• 29A: Fix, as brakes (reline) - a reasonable answer, but one that would not come. I had REPADS (getting the verb form wrong) and then RESHOE (!?).
• 6D: Home of the Cowboys, familiarly (Big D) - I've been burned by this answer before, so not today, and yet this feels very un-Monday. The time I got burned was a Sunday, I think. BIG D got their asses handed to them by the hot-and-cold Eagles yesterday. Boo hoo (sarcasm=high).
• 10D: Isle of Man's locale (Irish Sea) - had the IRI- and I swear to you IRISH never occurred to me. This wasn't terribly hard. My brain just froze.
• 13D: Swiss city on the Rhine, old-style (Basle) - this is a Saturday answer. WTF!?!?!
• 19D: Working stiff (prole) - a fine word, but Not one I was expecting today. Kept trying to make PEON fit.
• 23D: French city where Jules Verne was born (Nantes) - Uncle! Turns out NANTES is more common than I thought, but still ... if I had to name 10 French cities, this one would not make the list.
• 43D: Mountain ridges (aretes) - Yikes. A totally uncommon word in the real world, but one that does have a certain presence in xworld. Surprised to see it on a Monday, especially with all the other reasonably tough words.

Liked:

• 56A: Auto route from Me. to Fla. (U.S. One) - an inventive, playful five-letter answer.
• 5D: Shipment to a steel mill (iron ore) - better than just ORE. IRON ORE is actually quite common, as 7-letter answers go.
• 44D: Powerful rays (mantas) - Oh, those rays.

Signed, Rex Parker, King of CrossWorld

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WEDNESDAY, Nov. 7, 2007 - Richard Chisholm

Relative difficulty: Easy-Medium

THEME: "Two Kinds of Boats" - 38A: What 18-, 23-, 55- and 63-Across each comprises

I'm not very ... nautical. I had no idea there were so many kinds of boats. What's a "Party Boat?" Anyway, there is much that is ungainly about this puzzle, starting with the theme clue and answer, neither of which is worded very pleasantly. There are other items of unpleasantness below. What impressed me about this puzzle was me (I), in that I had many blind stabs that ended up being correct, despite feeling very shaky at first. This was definitely a puzzle where lots of prior puzzle experience paid off. ERIN, EULER, and CAIRO, for instance, came instantly, which they would not have even one year ago, and that helped me sail through this puzzle relatively unscathed. Lots of crosswordese (both high- and low-end), but no real challenges - only one word that was out of my comfort zone. So overall, this was a BLAND (52D: Short on flavor), if somewhat heartening experience.

Theme answers:

• 18A: Romantic goings-on (love life) - this slowed me down, as I had the LOVE and couldn't figure out what followed, which kept me from flowing nicely into the NE. Had to go down and approach it from below.
• 23A: Tupperware sale event (house party) - they are called "Tupperware Parties." "HOUSE PARTY" was a movie about very bad haircuts, featuring rap duo Kid 'N' Play
• 55A: Catching cold? (ice fishing) - first, clue = [gag]. Second ... nope, that's it. Just first.
• 63A: Cockpit datum (air speed)

There were two compass directions and one near-compass direction, which just seems lazy:

• 66A: Vane dir. (NNE)
• 10D: Suffix with Brooklyn (ESE) - sorry, still a compass point
• 6D: Sound of a leak (SSS) - pretty damned close

There was also too much of the puzzle talking about itself:

• 40D: "_____ Believer" ("I'm a")
• 57D: Answer to "Who's there?" ("It is I")
• 67A: "You lookin' _____?" ("at me")

And two different times of day. Come on!

• 43A: Early time to rise (six a.m.)
• 71A: When many stores open (at nine)

The only part that gave me trouble was the crossing of PIPETS (47D: Lab tubes) and PHIS (61A: Fraternity letters). PIPETS in general gave me trouble, as I barely know the word. The clue on PHIS is horribly non-specific, but I figured that PIPETS was a better guess for [Lab tubes] than PICETS, so it all worked out in the end. Speaking of non-specific clues, what's up with 22A: Poetic land (Erin)? I mean, I got it instantly, so maybe that means it's a good clue, but ... couldn't many lands claim to be "poetic?" Cuba? Iran? Troy? My greatest triumph of the day was guessing LIAISE (4D: Act as go-between) - a ghastly word - off of just the "E." Got FOCI (42D: Points that may have rays) pretty quickly even though my first instinct was to see "rays" as fish. I live quite near UTICA (34A: Erie Canal city) - always nice to have a geographical edge. Some part of me is pleased to see geographical-sounding answers clued in non-geographical ways:

• RENO (21A: Clinton cabinet member)
• PENN (24D: "All the King's Men" star, 2006)

Lastly, HUB (28D: Important airport) reminds me of a fantastic John Updike story called "The Christian Roommates," which I just finished teaching in my Honors Seminar. "HUB" is the main character's nickname. He practices yoga and prays effusively and tears up letters from the draft board without reading them and steals busted parking meters from the scenes of car accidents ... and generally disturbs the hell out of his more staid roommate ("Orson the Parson"). Why am I talking about this story? Not sure. But it stuck with me, clearly, so maybe it's worth checking out.

Signed, Rex Parker, King of CrossWorld

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