Stickler for military discipline / SUN 3-29-26 / Turn into logs / Internet-influenced writing genre / Gertrude who swam the English Channel / Common vessel for a cosmopolitan / Tired old advertising mascot? / Pertaining to genetic copies / Leader ousted in 1955 / "The Office" accountant who kept a cat in her desk drawer / Religious title that translates to "ocean monk" / In Norse myth, world held up by the branches of Yggdrasil

Constructor: Michael and Oliver Schlossberg

Relative difficulty: Medium-Challenging

[51D: "Star Wars" title (DARTH)]

THEME: Roundabouts — the grid has five "roundabouts"; one answer enters the roundabout from the west and stops right there; three other answers are extensions of that first answer, and they "exit" the roundabout at the south, east, and north, respectively, and you have to follow the the letters in the roundabout to make the answers make sense:

First roundabout:

• MART (37A: Convenience store)
• MARTIALART (48D: Kendo or aikido)
• MARTINET (40A: Stickler for military discipline)
• MARTINIGLASS (5D: Common vessel for a cosmopolitan)

Second roundabout:

• BUT (42A: Nevertheless)
• BUTTIGIEG (52D: "Mayor Pete")
• BUTTOCKS (43A: Rear end)
• BUTTONFLIES (14D: Alternatives to zippers on blue jeans)

Third roundabout:

• BAL (68A: The Orioles, on a scoreboard)
• BALLGOWN (73D: Fancy dress)
• BALLOTS (69A: They're cast in November)
• BALLOONANIMAL (25D: Entertainer's creation at a child's birthday party)

Fourth roundabout:

• MICH (101A: Wisc. neighbor)
• MICHELLE (107D: One of the Obamas)
• MICHELOB (102A: Brand from Anheuser-Busch)
• MICHELINMAN (72D: Tired old advertising mascot?)

Fifth roundabout:

• ARM (103A: Branch)
• ARMANIS (110D: Some expensive suits)
• ARMAGNAC (104A: French brandy)
• ARMAGEDDON (75D: It's the end of the world)

Word of the Day: MARTINET (40A) —

 

[merriam-webster.com]

• • •

I completed this puzzle without fully understanding the gimmick. I could see that answers were entering and emerging, but I tried to make that little arrow-circle square at the middle of each "roundabout" mean something—I thought it represented letters, somehow, and I couldn't understand why it seemed to be representing different sets of letters for each answer. Over time, I could see that the answer going south had no letters added, the one going east seemed to have just one, and the one headed south had two, but I was solving at a reasonable clip and never really stopped to try to figure it all out. I kept waiting for a revealer to explain it all to me, but ... it never arrived. Perhaps if the roundabouts were circles (like actual roundabouts) and not squares (wtf????), the whole "roundabout" concept would've been clearer to me earlier, I don't know. No "roundabout" I have ever been in has ever had ninety-degree angles like that. I go through traffic circles like that nearly every day, all of them circular. So I'm not a fan of the visual representation of the roundabouts, but I am a fan of the concept in general. It is elaborate and kinda wild and really well executed. Also, that giant open section in the north features some of the most inventive grid-building I've seen. You've got the back end of BALLOON ANIMAL shooting up into the center of that section, and then a bunch of stellar long non-theme answers filling the spaces around it, including TRIVIA APP, PRICELINE, DALAI LAMA, ON VACAY (!) and always adorable RED PANDAS. OK, you also have the decidedly ugly CLONAL (8D: Pertaining to genetic copies), but hey, it's a small price to pay for the rest of it. This theme is so architecturally complex and so dense that it must've been an adventure filling the grid At All, let alone filling it so creatively. Maybe the one (high difficulty level) begat the other (extreme inventiveness). Whatever. This is the rare Sunday puzzle that seems worthy of the real estate it takes up. And one of the rare "architectural feats" that was actually interesting to solve (even if my aha moment came very, very late).

Two parts of the puzzle seemed particularly treacherous. The first was MARTINET. I know the word ... but it's not exactly an everyday word, and because it was involved in the first "roundabout" I came to, and I didn't really understand who the "roundabout" worked, I wasn't entirely sure MARTINET was even right. What if it was something like, uh, MARINE VET, and I just wasn't seeing how the theme was working? I think of MARTINETs as being stern, but I don't associate the word with specifically "military" discipline, so I hesitated there. And I knew EDERLE! (crosswordese to the rescue!) (31D: Gertrude who swam the English Channel). Seems like MARTINET might've been even harder to pick up without EDERLE to help you confirm it. Aside from MARTINET, the other yikes part of the grid was CRONUS (71A: Father of Zeus). This is because my brain hiccuped and I wrote in URANUS (so many shared letters ...) without blinking, without hesitating, instantly. But URANUS was not Zeus's father, but his grandfather. Close, no cigar! Anyway, URANUS gave me "OH, LARDY" at 56D: "Good heavens!," and I was totally prepared to accept "OH, LARDY" as some horrid phonetically-spelled regionalism (actually thought to myself, "'OH, LAWDY' would be better”). The only way I caught the URANUS error was by (luckily) noticing that I had INUA as the answer for 62D: Early empire builder (INCA). No such thing as INUA (I'm pretty sure). So in went INCA and LARDY (!) became LORDY (better!) and that was the very last thing I wrote in the grid.

I kept wanting the letters inside the roundabouts to spell something or mean something ... and of course they did "mean" something, ultimately—you have to follow them around in order to make sense of all three answers that exit from the roundabout. Which brings me to the only part of the theme that doesn't quite work: that first answer, the one that enters but does not leave the roundabout. If you enter a roundabout you have to leave the roundabout. You do not stop on a roundabout. Have you ever been behind someone who stopped on a roundabout?! Chaos. Nightmare scenario. You have to keep moving and you have to (eventually) leave. So in order for three of the theme answers to work beautifully, one of them has to kick things off by awkwardly driving into the roundabout and ... stopping. I'm trying not to cling too hard to roundabout realism today. You can't have three answers exit if you don't first have one answer enter. A little unrealism is just the price you pay for the overall effect. I'm OK with that. I'm much more bothered by the square roundabouts than I am by the non-exiting answers.

Outside the theme answers, things look pretty good. I'm not too bothered by the doubling up of UP—I just wish one of those UP answers wasn't SAW UP, what in the world!? (93A: Turn into logs). What are we doing here? Who's supposed to be saying this, a cartoon pioneer? "After I SAW UP some wood I'm gonna scare up some grub!" SAW UP appears to be on a cycle, reappearing in the grid every thirty years like some kind of strange crossword comet (1965, 1996, 2026). I hope I live to see its next appearance, and yet I also hope I never see it again. The other "up" phrase is LACES UP, a perfectly fine phrase. If there's another "up" phrase I've missed, clearly it's not bothering me.

Bullets:

• 50D: Tots' pops (DADAS) — this is a ridiculous plural. I know it seems like an acceptable plural, but no tot would ever say DADAS. Just the one. There are mamas and there are papas but there are not DADAS. I suppose if a child had two dads, then DADAS is theoretically possible, but even then, I just don't see her describing them collectively. By the time she got the whole plural-with-an-S thing down, I think she'd be past the "dada" stage. Strange that I've seen DADAS so many times (fourteen since I started this blog), and this is the first time it struck me as absurd. 
• 90A: Classic Andy Warhol subject (MARILYN) — hey, did you know that SOUP CAN and MARILYN have the same number of letters?! It's true! Ask me how I know!

• 94D: Leader ousted in 1955 (PERON) — I had to keep shouting at my brain, "No, not PEROT! The other guy ... the Evita guy ... come on!"
• 27A: "The Office" accountant who kept a cat in her desk drawer (ANGELA) — I laughed just remembering ANGELA. The clue-writing today was really colorful and entertaining, on the whole. The groaner clue on U.C.L.A. (122A: What you do when you tour a certain SoCal campus, phonetically?). The bizarro trivia clue on UFO (125A: Purported sighting recorded by Puritan governor John Winthrop in 1639). I mean, 54A: Heart on one's sleeve, perhaps, in brief (TAT)!?! What a great literalization of a common idiom (in case you were unaware, a "sleeve" is a large tattoo covering most or all of a person's arm). And [Tired old advertising mascot?] for MICHELIN MAN!? That's primo stuff right there.

["Tired!"]

• 89A: Predator that might hunt by electrolocation (EEL) — I love that "electrolocation" is a real thing (I did not know that) and that I could use the word to infer EEL (via "electric EEL")
• 79D: Purple smoothie add-in (AÇAI BERRY) — there's something decadent about getting the whole BERRY when normally (quite normally—regularly, constantly) we just get AÇAI. Amplified crosswordese. I like it.
• 29A: Internet-influenced writing genre (ALT-LIT) — I have never heard of this genre. I don't really believe it's a genre. "Alternative literature brings together people with a common interest in the online publishing world" (wikipedia). Wait, is this ALT-LIT? Am I ALT-LIT? Are we ALT-LIT?

That's all for today. See you next time.

Signed, Rex Parker, King of CrossWorld

P.S. I'm going to see John Mulaney today! His stand-up tour ("Mister Whatever") is, improbably, coming through Ithaca, so we're going. No idea why I'm telling you; I'm just excited is all. Big names (that I want to see) rarely come to my neck of the NY woods. Fun fact: MULANEY (7) has never appeared in the NYTXW. So, if you're playing at home, that's three SAWUPs, zero MULANEYs. Also zero OZUs, btw. But you knew that. I've said that many (many) times before. 

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Men who marry later in life / SUN 10-12-25 / Low-pitched jazz instruments for short / Lampshade-shaped candy piece / Barista's flourish / Green or black African menace / Classic car that shared its name with a planet, informally / Online shorthand meaning "Victory!"

Constructor: Michael Schlossberg

Relative difficulty: Easy-Medium

THEME: "Make No Mistake" — four pairs of adjacent theme answers; in each pair, the first answer contains two measurement abbreviations (in circled squares), while the second answer features a scissors icon and a dotted line between two of its boxes, indicating where the letters "ONCE" have been cut out; each of these pairs is meant to illustrate the familiar rule of thumb from carpentry, "MEASURE TWICE, CUT ONCE" (63A: Carpenter's adage illustrated four times in this puzzle) 

Theme answers:

• MINE ALL MINE / NOT FROM C[ONCE]NTRATE (23A: Boast accompanying an evil laugh [120 sec.] / 28A: Words on a juice carton)
• FENNEL BULBS / TO WHOM IT MAY C[ONCE]RN (41A: Licorice-flavored vegetables [32 oz.])
• GALILEO GALILEI / STAND [ON CE]REMONY (83A: Scientist who spent his last years under house arrest [8 qt.] / 89A: Observe the expected formalities)
• WENT FIFTY-FIFTY / C[ONCE]DING DEFEAT (105A: Split something equally [24 in.] / 112A: Waving the white flag, so to speak)

Word of the Day: BENEDICTS (75D: Men who marry later in life) —

 

1.

1821–

A newly married man; esp. an apparently confirmed bachelor who marries. [< the character of that name in Shakespeare's Much Ado about Nothing.] (OED)

• • •

Despite the elaborate visual wordplay, this one felt mostly dull and oddly joyless. The revealer is the only answer in the whole thing that has any sense of play. The theme answers themselves are just iterations of the same idea, over and over, with no humor or wit in the clues or answers. You've got two measurement abbrs. in one answer, and you cut "ONCE" from the other. Four times. Shrug. The measure part doesn't even work that well, conceptually. Those abbrs. are for measurements, not "measures," even if you concede that the latter is essentially a synonym of the former, you still have the problem of the "measures" in question mostly having nothing to do with carpentry. The only one of these "measures" that you would actually "measure" in a way that's related to the carpentry rule of thumb is "FT." You don't measure a gallon, let alone cut it. Same also with pound and minute. As for cutting "ONCE," yeah, that happens, but there's no fun there. The little dotted line and scissors icon tells you exactly where the "cut" is happening, so there's not even the fun / challenge of discovery. Just ... cut here. Whoopee. I found those little scissors super-annoying from a visual perspective; I solve on my laptop, and I kept trying to move those scissors icons out of the way, repeatedly mistaking them for my mouse cursor. Not a fan of the visual clutter. Some of the theme answers were inventive and fun just as answers (i.e. non-thematically fun), stuff like TO WHOM IT MAY C[ONCE]RN and STAND [ON CE]REMONY and NOT FROM C[ONCE]NTRATE and FENNEL BULBS, but both GALILEO GALILEI and "MINE ALL MINE" felt like cop-outs—basically getting to two "measures" by just repeating words, which feels like cheating. Actually, that happens with WENT FIFTY-FIFTY too, which may be why I like FENNEL BULBS so much—at least it's trying. I can see how this concept might have seemed intriguing, but the execution just didn't make for a fun solve for me today.

The most annoying part of the solve, for me, was the proximity of BARISAXES (?!!?!?) (25A: Low-pitched jazz instruments for short) to the little scissors / dotted line icon in NOT FROM C/NTRATE. Since the "BARI" part of BARISAXES is proximate to the icon, I thought the "TONE" had been cut out of the answer for some reason. Having never ever (ever) seen the term BARISAXES in my life, this assumption seemed reasonable. Obviously there is a missing "TONE," and then there's a little scissors icon there, so ... I guess the "TONE" got cut too. Only ... no. BARISAXES is just a word. All on its own. Nothing (formally) but. Obviously the "TONE" of "BARITONE" has been lost in the shortening, but that has nothing to do with today's theme. Mere coincidence. The other thing I had no clue about was BENEDICTS (as defined). If I ever knew that term, I forgot it. Do people use it? Does it have any contemporary currency? Maybe it's got some kind of prominence in some quarter of the pop cultural world that I'm unaware of? The term comes from the character Benedick in Much Ado About Nothing, but did not become a general term for "confirmed bachelors" who finally get married until the 19th century. If it has had any life after the 19th century, I haven't seen it.

Miscellaneous:

• 4A: Words that might precede "Out, darned Spot!"? ("BAD DOG!") — this is doubly weird. First, the Macbeth quote is "Out, damned spot!"; why in the world would you bowdlerize it? And second, why in the world are you yelling "BAD DOG!" at your dog? The dog's not bad. Yelling at your dog only scares your dog. And yelling judgmental phrases (as opposed to commands the dog can understand) is basically useless. You're not helping. Calm down. 
• 36A: Lampshade-shaped candy piece (ROLO) — I don't know that I laughed out loud, but I did find this clue funny. "Lampshade-shaped" is exactly right. Unexpected yet precise phrasing. Nice.

• 101A: Buddhist riddles (ZEN KOANS) — probably the fanciest answer in the grid. Feels fresh, looks great. A "Z" + "K" answer ... not easy to come by. Well, there's KAZOO, and KAMIKAZE, and ZEKE and KAZAM (or, as we saw earlier this week, ALAKAZAM) ... but somehow this one is better than all those.
• 1D: Green or black African menace (MAMBA) — got this quickly. "Black MAMBA" was Kobe Bryant's (self-ascribed) nickname, so the snake's name is familiar to me for that reason, and the "black" in the clue really tripped the answer. MAMBA helped me get rid of my very first and very wrong answer at 1A: Common sight near the entrance of a mall (I had ATM (?!)).
• 12D: Classic car that shared its name with a planet, informally (MERC) — me: "Four-letter planet, gotta be MARS! Wait ... there's a classic car called a MARS? That sounds ... wrong." MERC is short for Mercury, which was a make of car. Didn't know the whole make was classic. I feel like Mercurys were around fairly recently. Yes, they were: "Ford announced the closure of the division in 2010" (wikipedia). 
• 38D: "Charlotte's Web" author's inits. (E.B.W.) — Elwyn Brooks ("E.B.") White. Never really noticed how his initials are, as crossword clues often like to say, "apt" (an anagram of "Web"). Would've been apter if W.E.B. Du Bois had been the author, but still, pretty apt.

• 60D: Barista's flourish (SWIRL) — I'm not a barista and never have been, but SWIRL seems pretty remedial as barista flourishes go. I usually get some variation on a fern leaf, which is at least slightly fancier (and, if you're in NZ, apt!)

• 64D: Name found in "whole milk" (EMIL) — why? Why would you do this? It's not even apt! Try harder.
• 41D: Online shorthand meaning "Victory!" ("FTW!") — "For the win!" Used to see this more ~ten years ago than I do now, but it remains a thing.
• 101D: Company that owns Words With Friends (ZYNGA) — got it, but spelled it ZENGA. I blame JENGA.

That's it. See you next time.

Signed, Rex Parker, King of CrossWorld

P.S. hey, it's spooky season (boo!), so if you are a fan of horror movies and crosswords, or you know someone who is, or you're not a fan of horror movies but enjoy crosswords and want to learn something, consider picking up Nightmare Crosswords: Puzzles to Die For by puzzlemaker Adam Simpson. "50 Fun and Challenging Crossword Puzzles Packed with Horror Trivia." I am a huge movie fan but not a huge horror fan, and yet I still loved solving these. They're entertaining and well made. Get this book for yourself or some horror/crossword fan that you love. And if your loved one is more a Word Search person (no judgment!), Adam's also got a book out called Nightmare Word Search. I can't vouch for the word searches, but the crossword book is very much worth your time.

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Airport sign carrier / SUN 7-20-25 / Japanese pitcher nicknamed "The Tornado" / Newberry-winning author Scott ___ / Scottish regional accents / Home to Uganda's presidential palace / The small screen's second Golden Age, informally / What the Mosquirix vaccine targets / It's literally "inflated" in the kitchen / Indian tourist mecca / Lover of Bassanio, in Shakespeare / Actress Smith of Fox's "Empire"

Constructor: Michael Schlossberg

Relative difficulty: Easy

THEME: "Ten Point Spread" — then theme answers, each with a "point" pun for a clue:

Theme answers:

1. SISTINE CHAPEL (23A: Cardinal point?)
2. CASH REGISTER (27A: Tipping point?)
3. SPEED TRAP (51A: Fine point?)
4. HERB GARDEN (53A: Plot point?)
5. DATING SITE (69A: Match point?)
6. PHOTO BOOTH (72A: Flash point?)
7. BARBERSHOP (85A: Style point?)
8. DAIRY FARM (89A: Low point?) (because cows low (or "moo"))
9. TATTOO PARLOR (111A: Sticking point?)
10. GIRL SCOUT CAMP (121A: Brownie point?)

Word of the Day: ENTEBBE (120A: Home to Uganda's presidential palace) — 

Entebbe is a city in Central Uganda which is located on Lake Victoria peninsula, approximately 36 kilometres (22 mi) southwest of the Ugandan capital city, Kampala. Entebbe was once the seat of government for the Protectorate of Uganda prior to independence, in 1962. The city is the location of Entebbe International Airport, Uganda's largest commercial and military airport, which gained worldwide attention in a 1976 Israeli rescue of 100 hostages kidnapped by the militant group of the PFLP-EO and Revolutionary Cells (RZ) organizations. Entebbe is also the location of State House, the official office and residence of the President of Uganda. (wikipedia)

• • •

Conceptually, this felt very simple and kind of phoned-in. There should also be a hyphen in the title ("Ten-point" is adjectival), but now I'm just sidetracked by minutiae ... which is what generally happens when there's not much going on with the theme. Puns on "points." That is it. Shrug. You know what happens when your theme is giving absolutely nothing? All I can think about are the minutiae. Like ... MEETER!? (49A: Airport sign carrier). LOL do you have any idea how long I stared at that trying to make it be a word. I was dead certain I had an error. I was not sure what was meant by "sign carrier"— airlines are known as "carriers" (obviously), so I got very confused. I just stared and stared at MEETER, wondering what kind of thing it could be (besides a typo of "meter" or "metier"). Worse, I was not entirely certainly of that last vowel in ANDERSEN (-SON seemed plausible) (17D: Author of "The Princess and the Pea" and "The Ugly Duckling"), and DISUSED is not a term I'd ever use (least of all as a synonym for "Derelict") (22D: Derelict), so MEETER had me doubting so many things. Finally, at some point, I realized that MEETER must mean "one who meets"—I swear to god this did not occur to me at all for many, many seconds. I've heard of a GREETER, and I've heard of a "meet & greet," but I've never, ever heard a human being referred to as a MEETER. If MEETER were a real thing people said, I guarantee you you'd be seeing it, a lot, in crosswords. All those "E"s + "T" and "R"!? Who could resist? TEETER, for instance, has been used forty-one (41) times in the Modern (Shortz) Era. Do you wanna know how many times MEETER has been used??? I'll give you a hint—less than forty-one. Way less. The answer: twice. That's including today. The last time MEETER appeared was almost twenty-three (23!) years ago: November, 2002. Before that, 1993, and before *that*, 1970 (!). Before that, it was clued a couple of times as [More fitting] and [More suitable], and, I have to be honest, I know that meaning is archaic ("meet" (2), here), but I Like It Better, mostly because this "modern" meaning ("one who meets ... someone") is so preposterous. 

With ten themers in this thing, there's not a lot of room for other longer, interesting answers. I guess you've got some 8s in the NE and SW corners, but they're nothing to write home about. Pretty ho-hum grid, overall. The first answer may have been the most original, and I was happy when (after a few seconds' worth of thinking) I came up with the answer that turned out to be right: PEAK TV (1A: The small screen's second Golden Age, informally). I knew "TV" was in there somewhere (no other reason the clue would be using "small screen" unless it was trying to avoid using "TV" ... because it appears in the answer). I don't really know when PEAK TV was, or is (is it? still?). Whoa, wikipedia claims it ended two years ago (2000-23, R.I.P.). And it's weird to call a "second" thing just ... PEAK (and not something signifying, I dunno, second-ness?). But it must be a widely used phrase because it didn't take me that long to come up with it. No surprise, PEAK TV is a debut, and for once, it's a debut I like! There are some other shorter colloquial phrases in this grid that I also like: "IT'S A GO" and "GAME ON!" give the grid some needed oomph. BROMANCE isn't original any more, but it's still strong. I was born in the year of the ROOSTER, and I love a good SOUFFLÉ, so the puzzle wasn't all bad, by any means. It just felt like ... a warm-up. A practice run. Not the main event. A little on the bland side, and a lot on the easy side. 

Besides the whole MEETER fiasco, there was one part of the puzzle that required some real effort on my part: the SW. I just don't like the phrase ORDOCS at all (or ERDOCS, for that matter) and today the letters I had in place (--D-CS) suggested MEDICS, so I stuck that in there, and there it sat, for a while. And under that was NOMO!? (97A: Japanese pitcher nicknamed "The Tornado"). Look, I got NOMO fairly easily (bec. I'm a baseball fan), but it still felt pretty obscure, especially without "Hideo" in the clue to make the answer a little more obvious. Still, there haven't been *that* many Japanese pitchers of note, so ... NOMO! I had no idea he had a nickname, or that it was "The Tornado." He pitched two no-hitters, I think ... yes! He was also Rookie of the Year (1995) and twice led the Majors in strikeouts. So, a definite star. But still, bygone, and to non-baseball fans, probably not a meaningful name. Anyway, the real culprit down there was MEDICS—that little error made the SW decidedly tougher than other parts of the grid. But still, not that tough.

Further observations:

• 33A: Scottish regional accents (BURRS) — sincerely wanted this to be BRAES (or "brogues" or something like that). But BRAES are Scottish *hills*. And "brogues" wouldn't fit.
• 60A: What the Mosquirix vaccine targets (MALARIA) — most pharmaceutical names are pure nonsense (Skyrizi? Really?) so it's nice to see that at least some naming entity is on their game (assuming "Mosquirix" is, in fact, meant to evoke mosquitos, the bugs that spread MALARIA).
• 79A: Mary Westmacott, for Agatha Christie (ALIAS) — huh. Was not aware she was ever known by anything except Agatha Christie. But it looks like she wrote six *romantic* novels under the name of Mary Westmacott. 

• 75A: Comic who said "One thing about being narrow-minded—you'll never be lonely" (SAHL) — got this off the "L" based on pure crossword reflex (Mort SAHL used to appear in the grid A Lot back in the day)
• 8D: Sound while sticking out one's tongue (AHH) — screwed up the AAH / AHH thing again today. Coincidentally, I was just talking about my childhood dentist today with my sister, Amy, who is in CA cleaning out my parents' garage so they can rent the house. Cleaning out the garage means stumbling over a Lot of family history, including this photo of me and her, which I'd never seen before. See if you can figure out what prompted the "dentist" talk (hint: it's not my toothless smile or my awesome tank top):

[Me: "Are you wearing a bib? Are you dressed as a nun?"]

• 61D: Org. with a "Tipsy Tow" service (AAA) — this sounds like a somewhat drunk guy is gonna tow your car and maybe overshare and maybe hit on you? Pass.
• 65D: It's literally "inflated" in the kitchen (SOUFFLÉ) — my mom used to make a great cheese SOUFFLÉ. What I remember is that we couldn't run around while it was in the oven because somehow heavy footsteps could make the SOUFFLÉ collapse. I can't find anything to confirm this fear was real. Was mom just using the SOUFFLÉ as a pretext to get us to shut up and stop running around for half an hour? 
• 102D: Suburban setting? (CAR LOT) — the Suburban here is a Chevy Suburban. I had my first kiss in a Chevy Suburban. It was the summer of 1987. This is as much romantic history as I'm ever going to share with you. I know. You're welcome. (Also, hey, Cheryl, wherever you are—hope you're doing well)

Signed, Rex Parker, King of CrossWorld

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Breakfast order request / SUN 3-9-25 / Footwear for a sharp dresser? / They're below par / Headwear that's stereotypically red / It's blowin' in the wind / Baby name whose popularity plummeted after 2015 / Service providers? / Mexican marinade

Constructor: Michael Schlossberg

Relative difficulty: Medium

THEME: Extra! Extra! — the grid has a list of headlines clued with their publication venues and dates.

Theme answers:

• 25A TITANIC SINKS [London Herald 4/16/1912]
• 27A NIXON RESIGNS [The New York Times, 8/9/1974]
• 39A DEWEY DEFEATS TRUMAN [Chicago Daily Tribune, 11/3/1948]
• 63A WALL ST LAYS AN EGG [Variety, 10/30/1929]
• 91A FORD TO CITY: DROP DEAD [New York Daily News, 10/30/1975]
• 113A / 115A HEADLESS BODY IN TOPLESS BAR [New York Post, 4/15/1983]

Word of the Day: CASSANDRA [Seer cursed by Apollo so that her prophecies would not be believed] —

Cassandra or Kassandra (/kəˈsændrə/;^[2] Ancient Greek: Κασσάνδρα, pronounced [kas:ándra], sometimes referred to as Alexandra; Ἀλεξάνδρα)^[3] in Greek mythology was a Trojan priestess dedicated to the god Apollo and fated by him to utter true prophecies but never to be believed. In modern usage her name is employed as a rhetorical device to indicate a person whose accurate prophecies, generally of impending disaster, are not believed.

• • •

It's Rafa again! Don't worry if you're tired of me -- I'll be gone tomorrow. Let's talk about this Sunday puzzle.

This one really wasn't for me. I'm not really sure who it was for, but I do know for sure it was not for me. I'm generally a believer in "if you have nothing nice to say, then say nothing at all" ... but alas I do have to write this blog. So, let me try and break down why the solve didn't spark much joy. 

It all boils down to the theme, which fell flat for me. "Here is a list of seven things that happened!" ... okay, and? Where is the wordplay? Where is the wit? Where is the ingenuity? Sure, not every Sunday theme needs to be completely groundbreaking. But a list of headlines really feels like it's missing some serious oomph to justify an entire Sunday-size grid. They aren't even in some specific order, or related in any way other than being subjectively famous. In general, a completely arbitrary rule of thumb that I just invented right now is that if a Wikipedia page exists listing (almost) all of your theme entries, it's probably not an exciting enough theme for a Sunday puzzle!

A drawstring going through some EYELETs

Also, only the first three of these headlines were familiar to me. TITANIC SINKS and NIXON RESIGNS are just very straightforward ... like, yes, these events did happen. DEWEY DEFEATS TRUMAN was somewhat familiar to me as I'd seen the photo of Truman holding the newspaper (spoiler alert for time travelers from the '40s: Dewey did not, in fact, defeat Truman). The others were ???? to me. Doesn't mean that they are bad or unworthy entries (there are many, many things I am unfamiliar with) but it just made my whole experience with this puzzle a giant meh. To be fair, I was born many years after the most recent of these headlines, so maybe the history / headline buffs among you will have had a different experience. Were people familiar with all of these? Let me know!

Morehouse's campus (mentioned in the HBCU clue)

Anyways, let's say some nice things about this puzzle now!!! APOCRYPHA is a very fun word that made me smile. APRILS [They're known to open with some jokes] has a cute clue. FOR THE WIN, IT'S A SHAME, I DECLARE, AW COME ON are all fun non-theme entries. ASSESSEES is not "good" but is hysterically 88.9% Es and Ss, so it kind of still made me smile. It really is a solid construction overall. There's not much gluey fill to nitpick here at all. This was clearly gridded and filled with a lot of care. Just a pity that the theme didn't do it for me.

NAMIBIA's Skeleton Coast

Bullets:

• 4A SHAD [Common saltwater fish] / 68D GAR [Needlefish] — Was funny to see both these fish that I only know about from crosswords in the same grid
• 50A NAMIBIA [Driest country in sub-Saharan Africa] — I've never been, but I think Namibia is so cool. Its coastal area is known as the "Skeleton Coast" because of the number of shipwrecks around it. There is often very thick fog, and there are basically no human settlements along most of the coast. It looks gorgeous, though.
• 93A YARD [48-oz. beer glass] — This was totally new to me. I don't really drink so it makes sense I wouldn't know this but it made that area a little hard (along with the tricky clue for PORCH [Where people typically go to the mat?] and the (to me) completely unknown HEADLESS BODY / IN A TOPLESS BAR). Actually, thinking back, I really did flail quite a lot in that section.
• 45D UNION [The "U" of 60-Down] — I lived my whole life thinking USSR stood for United Soviet Socialist Republics. Now I know!

Signed, Rafa

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Shin armor / SUN 6-23-24 / Two farthings, colloquially / Too much, musically / Mechanical catch / Eyelike openings / Danced like Cardi B / Knowable without experience / Chargeable transport / Kvetchers' cries / Yarn label number / Cereal with a Mega Stuf variety

Constructor: Michael Schlossberg

Relative difficulty: Easy

THEME: "Picture Day" — Famous paintings are clued via literal descriptions that contain numbers; the whole thing is tied together by the final theme answer, PAINT BY NUMBERS (113A: Kind of craft store kit ... or a hint to this puzzle's theme):

Theme answers:

• AMERICAN GOTHIC (23A: Two Iowans (1930))

[Grant Wood]

• GUERNICA (37A: Six Basque villagers (1937))

[Pablo Picasso]

• THE STARRY NIGHT (42A: 12 orbs (1889))

[Vincent Van Gogh]

• GIRL WITH A PEARL EARRING (68A: One gemstone (1685))

[Johannes Vermeer]

• THE PERSISTENCE / OF MEMORY (86A: With 99-Across, four timepieces (1931))

[Salvador Dalí]

Word of the Day: Vikki CARR (28D: Vocalist Vikki) —

Florencia Vicenta de Casillas-Martínez Cardona (born July 19, 1940), known by her stage name Vikki Carr, is an American vocalist. She has a singing career that spans more than five decades. 

Born in El Paso, Texas, to Mexican parents, she has performed in a variety of musical genres, including pop, jazz and country, while her greatest success has come from singing in Spanish. She established the Vikki Carr Scholarship Foundation in 1971. Vikki Carr has won three Grammys and was honored with a Lifetime Achievement Award in 2008 at the 9th Annual Latin Grammy Awards. [...] 

Under the stage name "Vikki Carr" she signed with Liberty Records in 1962. Her first single to achieve success was "He's a Rebel", which in 1962 reached No. 3 in Australia and No. 115 in the United States. Producer Phil Spector heard Carr cutting the song in the studio and immediately produced his own cover version with the Blossoms(though it was presented as a recording by The Crystals) which reached No. 1 in the United States. In 1966, Carr toured South Vietnam with actor/comedian Danny Kaye to entertain American troops. The following year, her album It Must Be Him was nominated for three Grammy Awards. The title track reached No. 3 on the Billboard Hot 100 in the United States in 1967, sold more than 1 million copies and received a gold disc. [...] Carr followed with two US Top 40 hits: 1968's "The Lesson" and 1969's "With Pen in Hand". Around this time, Dean Martin called her "the best girl singer in the business". In total, Carr had 10 singles and 13 albums that made the US pop charts. [...] Carr appeared to great acclaim in a 2002 Los Angeles production of the Stephen Sondheim musical Follies, which also featured Hal Linden, Patty Duke and Harry Groener. In 2006, Carr made a cameo appearance in a straight-to-video thriller called Puerto Vallarta Squeeze. (wikipedia)

• • •

I had a feeling this was going to be bad early on. By early on, I mean precisely here:

The single ALGA actually gave me a small "oof," and then that bloomed into a much bigger "Oof" before I even escaped the NW. The 1-2 of ALGA / A PRIORI would be a lot to take in such little space, but to have the laughable GREAVES running right through that same section, ye gods, wow. And I'm a former D&D enthusiast and sometime medievalist who actually knows a lot of terms for armor—but even I misspelled GREAVES at first pass (GRIEVES!). I haven't even hit the theme material yet, and already the vibe is bad. Then I hit the first themer and, having no idea what the gimmick is, with just AME- in place, throw down AMERICAN GOTHIC (23A: Two Iowans (1930)). Great painting, but the clue was so dumb and literal that I couldn't even fathom what the theme could be. And so, completely contrary to habit, I decided to jump to the bottom of the grid and work out the revealer before I went any farther. That led me into a bizarrely split solving pattern (just the NW and SE done, with acres of white space in between). It also led me to ... 

Annnnd that's where the puzzle lost me. Completely. For good. That is ... not a word. Nope. Stop. Stop. If you told me you were an AMBIVERT I would congratulate you on leading your best life and encourage you not to let anyone kink-shame you. After you patiently and earnestly explained to me that it's not a sex thing, and then explained what you believed AMBIVERTS meant, I would then ... quietly ... exit the conversation.

The worst part is that this word is now gonna be in Everyone's database and I mean we haven't even seen the singular yet, we just jumped right to the plural? Of a non-thing stupid word? Do AMBIVERTS wear GREAVES? Do AMBIVERTS Dream of Electric GREAVES? I grieve the introduction of AMBIVERTS to my vocabulary, that I know for sure. And this is all before I realized what a dud the theme is. I worked the revealer, ended up getting PAINT BY NUMBERS (which, come on, should really be PAINTING BY NUMBERS), sighed, shrugged, and decided, "well, this solve is already a wreck, let's see if we can't get all these paintings from just their clues." Who doesn't love an art test!? I got THE PERSISTENCE OF MEMORY solely from having most of the "OF MEMORY" part filled in. The others, I needed a little push with, but not much of one. Shortly I was here:

[I forgot there was one more to hunt down: the symmetrical counterpart to "OF MEMORY," i.e. GUERNICA]

Don't think I knew there was a definite article in THE STARRY NIGHT. Also probably thought it was STARRY STARRY NIGHT. For reasons. You know the reasons.

I never look at social media until I'm done with the puzzle, but when I'm done, sometimes I check in to see what reactions are out there. This one really spoke to me:

I enjoyed 0 minutes of this puzzle. You know the paintings or you don’t. I don’t. The “revealer” is not a hint and does not reveal anything.

Naticks all over. 5A/8D was my final but far from only. 9A? 87D? 91A? 79A?!? No idea how I got through this but glad it’s over. #NYTXW pic.twitter.com/WdIE4hQUup

— Xword Disinfo (@kcitian) June 23, 2024

Unlike this solver, I knew every painting. Cold. And that didn't help with the enjoyment factor. At all. I mean, yes, I enjoyed thinking about the paintings, I love art, hurray for art, but as a puzzle, no this didn't work for me. As for the "Naticks," I didn't have any, but I can absolutely understand someone's wrecking on PIAF / FAGIN (5A: "La Vie en Rose" singer / 8D: "Oliver Twist" antagonist) (two proper nouns! crossing! at an uninferrable letter! PIAF is a legend, so you should probably know her, but still, I sympathize), and whether you wrecked or not, PAWL is bad (esp. crossing AAH WII LLC dear lord, what a grim little stretch) (9A: Mechanical catch), and HA'PENNY is not great either (my brain wants this piece of bygone coinage to be "HAyPENNY") (87D: Two farthings, colloquially), and TROPPO ... well that's not bad, actually (91A: Too much, musically), but it's definitely highly technical, and will be tough for many. I can't share the consternation with OGLALAS, though (79A: Crazy Horse and kin)—or, rather, I can, but only with the fact that it's got an "S" on the end. The plural of OGLALA is OGLALA. Crazy Horse is OGLALA. His kin are OGLALA. They are The OGLALA. We have seen OGLALA in the NYTXW many times this century, whereas we haven't seen OGLALAS since 1968. 

The big, huge problem with the theme is that it has no boundaries, no limits. Any painting with any countable amount of anything in it qualifies! Here's [Three diners (1942)] 

(or [Two coffee urns (1942)] or [Seven stools (1942)])

And here's [Three picnickers (and some other lady, is she with them or not, who knows?) (1863)]

It is true that not many paintings are famous by name, so finding ones that are sufficiently famous *and* contain different ... numbers ... of things? ... *and* making those fit symmetrically, I'm sure that took some work. But still, as a cluing conceit, the number thing does Nothing. It adds on dimension, no trickery. Nothing. All for a revealer that doesn't really stick the landing. In a grid that's full of ... not always top-tier fill. I think my disappointment is augmented by the fact that I really do love art and do love the idea of an art-based theme (Liz Gorski's Guggenheim-themed Sunday being the Ideal Sunday theme that I carry around in my head and heart). This one just doesn't seem to be giving enough puzzle bang for my puzzle buck

Bullets:

• 27A: Patton crossed it in 1944 (SEINE) — while the PIAF / FAGIN crossing didn't give me any trouble, the SEINE / FAGIN crossing sure did. So many five-letter European rivers ... and I spelled it FAGAN to start.
• 109A: Eyelike openings (OCULI) — crosswordese of the first order. Always feels like cheating when I just "know" this stuff (from decades of doing crosswords). It's an architectural term.
• 
  14D: Actress Graff of "Mr. Belvedere" (ILENE) — speaking of crosswordese, this actress's name would be largely lost to time if it weren't for her highly convenient first name (five letters, alternating vowel-consonant pattern, beginning and ending with vowels, all common letters ... if you want your kid to be a crossword answer some day, start by naming them ILENE) (or ARELA, that would kill)
• 34D: Sorry excuse for a pillowcase? (SHAM) — I got this because I know "pillowcase" = SHAM. I don't exactly see how "SHAM" = "sorry excuse." I would not use "SHAM" that way. SHAM implies fraud, "sorry" merely weakness. Oh well. Maybe there's some deeper connection to pillowness (or sorriness) that I'm just missing.
• 38D: QB stat: Abbr. (ATT) — short for "attempt" (as in attempted pass, in U.S. football: attempts / completions => completion percentage, an important stat)
• 55D: Fresh perspective (NEW TAKE) — this feels like "Green paint," i.e. something someone might say but not something that really has standalone power. HOT TAKE, yes, NEW TAKE, not really.
• 77D: Starts of some cheers (HIPS) — possibly the most unnecessarily painful clue I've ever seen, emphasis on "unnecessary." You've got a perfectly good word and ... and ... you decided to make it a bizarrely plural (?!) partial cheer (in case you somehow don't know it, the "cheer" in question is "Hip Hip Hooray!"). Unfathomable editorial choice. “Some cheers”?! Name one other. (“Hip-Hop Hooray” doesn’t count)

• 90D: Country that had a nonviolent "singing revolution" in the late 1980s (ESTONIA) — I learn so much about ESTONIA from the crossword. ESTONIA must be the most common seven-letter country, or maybe it just seems that way because This Is Our Third ESTONIA Of The Week!!!  When you're pushing ESTONIA that hard, you gotta keep coming up with new, non-boring clues. This week's clues

WEDNESDAY: [What's opposite Finland on the Gulf of Finland]

SATURDAY: [First country to hold elections using internet voting]

TODAY: [Country that had a nonviolent "singing revolution" in the late 1980s]

Impress your friends with ESTONIA lore! Unless you like having friends, in which case don't do that. See you next time.

Signed, Rex Parker, King of CrossWorld

[Follow Rex Parker on Twitter and Facebook]

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