Faerie Queene woman whose name means peace / MON 10-19-15 / TV installation not requiring antenna / Electric Slide Cotton-Eyed Joe / Signature Muhammad Ali ploy / Smallish computer storage unit for short

Constructor: Bruce Venzke and Victor Fleming

Relative difficulty: Medium Monday

THEME: TIES (69A: Binds ... or a hint to the starts of the answers to the six starred clues) —

Theme answers:

• CABLE OUTLET (17A: *TV installation not requiring an antenna)
• WIRE FRAUD (24A: *Crime involving a Nigerian prince, maybe)
• LINE DANCE (50A: *Electric Slide or Cotton-Eyed Joe)
• STRING BEANS (62A: *Tall, skinny sorts)
• ROPE-A-DOPE (11D: *Signature Muhammad Ali ploy)
• CHAIN MAIL (31D: *Protective medieval gear)

Word of the Day: TAYE Diggs (43A: Diggs of "How Stella Got Her Groove Back") —

Scott Leo "Taye" Diggs (born January 2, 1971) is an American actor. He is perhaps best known for his roles in the Broadway musicals Rent and Hedwig and the Angry Inch, the film How Stella Got Her Groove Back, the series Private Practice, and the film The Best Man and its sequel The Best Man Holiday. (wikipedia)

• • •

Old Ideas week continues. Today, a classic First Words-type theme with a massive Thud of a revealer. Usually, these days, old theme types are livened up by some revealer that at least gives some interesting, wordplay-type angle to the whole set-up. But this puzzle is livened up only by Density, and there just aren't enough strong longer answers to sustain interest. The two Down themers are probably my favorite, but they are it, as far as interesting fill goes today.  The fill is not great, but I've certainly seen worse. Can't believe you couldn't somehow eliminate the icky IRENA (51D: "The Faerie Queene" woman whose name means "peace"), and OLD BAG is gross and sexist (65A: Hag) (particularly in the hands of male constructors and male editors), but other stuff is solid enough. Just dull. Last week is really highlighting how dull Normal Ideas weeks have become.


I have no idea what a CABLE OUTLET is and do not understand what "Installation" means in the clue, despite having cable TV/Internet, and despite asking my wife if she understood (no, not really—she could guess, but she could not be certain). There is no "outlet" in my house. I mean, the cable comes "out" of a panel in the wall that vaguely resembles an electrical outlet, but I have never heard it called "CABLE OUTLET" and I've certainly never thought of it as an "Installation." That answer and WIRE FRAUD slowed me down a bit today (WIRE FRAUD's clue was just fine—maybe a little more T or W than M, but just fine).


SKYPE was in the Mini today, which was a weird experience. I solve the Mini as a kind of 20-second appetizer before heading into the real puzzle. Probably a good idea to coordinate those two puzzles, to avoid dupes. Also, probably, not that big a deal.

I got nothing else on this one. 

Signed, Rex Parker, King of CrossWorld

[Follow Rex Parker on Twitter and Facebook]

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Colonnaded entrance / TUE 7-8-14 / Duettist with Elton John on 1976's Don't Go Breaking My Heart / Former Israeli president Weizman / Bankrupted company led by Kenneth Lay

Constructor: Bruce Venzke and Gail Grabowski

Relative difficulty: Easy-Medium

THEME: BARS (67A: Signs of cell service … or a word that can follow both parts of 18-, 23-, 36-, 52- and 58-Across):

Theme answers:

• HIGH ENERGY 
• SIDE SALAD
• OPEN SPACE
• SPORTS NUT
• COFFEE ROLL

Word of the Day: EZER Weizman (9D: Former Israeli president Weizman) —

Ezer Weizman (Hebrew: עזר ויצמן‎, 15 June 1924 - 24 April 2005) was the seventhPresident of Israel, first elected in 1993 and re-elected in 1998. Before the presidency, Weizman was commander of the Israeli Air Force and Minister of Defense. (wikipedia)

• • •

These are a couple of constructors whose work doesn't appear in the NYT very often, but who are very prolific, with their (individual) bylines appearing on CrosSynergy (syndicated) and Newsday puzzles all the time. Today's offering is a pretty standard theme-type: BWCF (Both Words Can Follow) (see also BWCP, i.e. Both Words Can Precede). I think "standard" is probably a pretty good way to describe the whole thing. Themers and/or fill really have to sparkle in order for an oft-used concept like this to work well, and there's not much sparkle here. That's one of the problems with the theme—you're pretty tightly constrained. In fact, it's a wonder you can get give theme answers to work at all. But OPEN SPACE isn't going to rock anyone's world, and I had to look up what a COFFEE ROLL even was. Fill is mostly adequate, though it dips into ugliness perhaps a bit too often. DOI and RUEDE are rough, and ONCDS (plural!?) feels very forced. Then there's your standard (that word again) spate of uber-familiar but not particularly lovely stuff like SPYS and STS and REUPS and EZER and REATA. The PORTICO / YOGA MAT pairing is pretty nice (11D: Colonnaded entrance / 12D: You might sit cross-legged on one), but most of the rest of the grid is just OK, at best.


Bullets:

• 3D: Duettist with Elton John on 1976's "Don't Go Breaking My Heart" (KIKI DEE) — 1976 is the summer I first started paying attention to pop music, and this song (along with "Afternoon Delight") are seared into my memory for that reason. I remember moving into our new house, which had an intercom system (!?) (which never got used ever as far as I remember), and it somehow could also play the radio, and so … yeah, you're 6 years old and you move into a new house and you fiddle with the crazy gadgets on the wall and there's KIKI DEE and Elton John and also a song about mid-day sex that you have no idea is about mid-day sex, but then again you are six and you think "making love" means "kissing on the couch" (the couch, for some reason, is crucial), so no one is surprised that "Afternoon Delight" is over your head.

• 9D: Former Israeli president Weizman (EZER) — I've been putting this guy's name in the puzzle for years, but never knew who he was. His dates (very recent) startled me. I think … I think I don't know what an "Israeli president" does. Prime minister, familiar. President … ?
• 47A: Fashion designer Gernreich (RUDI) — someday this name will stick. Not today. But someday.

Signed, Rex Parker, King of CrossWorld

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Cartoon chihuahua / WED 5-8-13 / Old Mideast alliance for short / Ho Chi Minh trail locale / Certain radio enthusiasts / Lifebuoy competitor / Lamprey hunter

Constructor: Bruce Venzke

Relative difficulty: Easy

THEME: HAPPY MOTHER'S DAY  // puzzle note in electronic version: "The print version of this puzzle contains the following additional clue after the Across and Down clues:

DIAGONAL
1 Annual message"

—theme answers are verb phrases referring to things one might have done (past tense) for Mother's Day, all clued as [Remembered Mom, in a way]:

• SHIPPED GIFT (18A)
• MAILED CARD (31A)
• CALLED HOME (48A)
• SENT FLOWERS (63A)

Word of the Day: HAROLD Lloyd (50D: Lloyd of the silents) —

Harold Clayton Lloyd, Sr. (April 20, 1893 – March 8, 1971) was an American film actor and producer, most famous for his silent comedies. // Harold Lloyd ranks alongside Charlie Chaplin and Buster Keaton as one of the most popular and influential film comedians of the silent film era. Lloyd made nearly 200 comedy films, both silent and "talkies", between 1914 and 1947. He is best known for his "Glass" character, a resourceful, success-seeking go-getter who was perfectly in tune with 1920s era America. (wikipedia)

• • •

It's not Mother's Day. Diagonal "message" is an almost interesting touch, but ... it's not Mother's Day.

Missing indefinite articles in first two theme answers are strange. Last two theme answers can follow pronoun "I" or "you" easily to form a complete sentence. Same can not be said of first two.

And then there's the fill. Today, it's all forgettable-to-terrible. Why we continue to get puzzles with fill this creaky, ancient, and crosswordesey in 2013, I just don't understand. There are great puzzle editors out there who would Never allow something to come out looking this ratty and dated. This fact comes up on a regular basis among my top constructing / solving friends (most of whose names you know). OH ME? When did *that* become a thing? I had trouble enough accepting AH, ME! OH ME can BITE ME. The pluralizing of sounds / exclamations like PSSTS and OHOS is just criminal. You could blame the extra burden placed on the grid by the "message," but you just have to look at the N/NE and S/SW (where the "message" holds no sway) to see that the "message" is not the problem. The inexplicably stale fill is. Straight outta 1979. Do they even make Lifebuoy any more? "Although Lifebuoy is no longer produced in the US and UK, it is still being mass produced by Unilever in Cyprus for the UK, EU, US and Brazil markets, as well as in Trinidad and Tobago for the Caribbean market" (wikipedia). So ... yes-ish? When's the last time ASTA, ELIA and EELER were all in the same 15x15 grid? Don't answer. Just ... don't.

Signed, Rex Parker, King of CrossWorld

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MONDAY, May 5, 2008 - Stella Daily and Bruce Venzke (EXXON COMPETITOR)

Relative difficulty: Easy-Medium

THEME: Rhymes with "Buddy Hackett"

Pretty ordinary Monday. Only thing that slowed me down was typos, the best of which was BLOG for BLOB (61D: Unidentifiable mass). Blanked for a moment on STOWE (1D: Vermont ski town), had to hack at CITGO (19A: Exxon competitor) a little, hesitated over BRIAR/BRIER (the "A" is correct - 43A: Kind of patch for a rabbit), went for TAKE HOLD instead of TAKE ROOT (41D: Become established), mysteriously entered TARP instead of the obvious DOME (18A: Many a stadium cover) ... yep, that's about it. All the theme answers rhyme. Yep, that pretty much sums it up. Had most trouble, theme-wise, with INCOME BRACKET, as my mind wanted only TAX BRACKET. A couple of the long Downs are pretty good. JUILLIARD (34D: Noted performing arts school) looks rather elegant in the grid, and MAD MONEY is suitably wacky. There's not much else to say here, except...

SKOSH (55D: Smidgen) - now, I know I've blogged about this word before, so seeing it there in the SE didn't faze me much. I know the spelling (TORI? - see 65A) threw me the first time I saw it in the grid, and this time I went with the "C" instead of the "K" at first, but didn't find it jarring at all. My wife, on the other hand, calls out from the other room: "Is 55D really S-K-O-S-H?" I said "Yeah, SKOSH ... means a little bit ... 'just a SKOSH.'" She says: "Neeeeever heard it." We occasionally come across these colloquial blind-spots, as she was born and raised in NZ, but she's lived here for nearly 20 years, so not knowing a reasonably common expression like this irks her, understandably. I looked up "SKOSH" in my Webster's and couldn't find it ... then I looked in the "addenda" (stuff added since 1961, I think), and there it was, "a small amount," from the Japanese sukoshi. World Wide Words has a fascinating entry about it, which I quote from here:

It first appeared in print in American English about 1951. Word researchers think American servicemen based in Japan brought it back at the time of the Korean War, though several subscribers have mentioned it was common among American servicemen in Japan in the years immediately following World War Two. It is a member of a group of words imported from Japanese in that period, others being origami, teriyaki, shiatsu, and karate. Skosh is a close imitation of the way that Japanese speakers themselves would say sukoshi in rapid conversation, suggesting that it was primarily communicated orally.

It usually turns up as an noun meaning a little bit, a jot, a small amount (“he solved the problem in a skosh more than 13 days”). One of its earlier appearances in print was in advertisements for Levi’s jeans that offered a fuller fitting for the middle-aged under the slogan “Just a skosh more room”.

My favorite part of looking up SKOSH in my dictionary was finding, directly underneath it, "skunk works":

[fr. Big Barnsmell's Skonk Works, illicit distillery in the comic strip Li'l Abner, by Al Capp †1979 Am cartoonist]: a usu. small and often isolated department or facility (as for engineering research and development) that functions with minimal supervision within a company or corporation.

I will be searching desperately for ways to use this term in the coming weeks.

Theme answers:

• 20A: Tourism bureau's offering (welcome packet)
• 28A: It's swung at Wimbledon (tennis racket)
• 48A: Pesky wasp (yellow jacket)
• 58A: It helps determine how much tax you owe the I.R.S. (income bracket)

Leftovers:

• 1A: Meat featured in a Monty Python musical title (Spam) - as in "Spam-a-Lot," the Broadway version of the great movie "Monty Python and the Holy Grail"
• 9A: Popeye's creator E.C. _____ (Segar) - a gimme, and a frequent grid denizen. I'm so behind on my reading ... I've had a gorgeous volume of SEGAR's sitting on my shelves for over a year and still haven't done much more than peek at it. Soon ... yes, soon all the unread books on my shelves will magically get read.
• 23A: The matador's opponent (el toro) - nice the / EL correspondence.
• 36A: 1983 Barbra Streisand title role ("Yentl") - "Uncle," I cry. "Uncle!" Enough with this movie already.
• 66A: Airs, in Latin (aurae) - mildly painful.
• 71A: Guitarist Atkins (Chet) - try this out.
• 3D: Like blue movies (adult) - "blue" = my favorite word for "risqué" or "indecent."
• 30D: Classic toothpaste brand (Ipana) - I've said this before, but the only way I know this toothpaste is from a single scene in the movie "Grease."
• 32D: Muammar el-Qaddafi's land (Libya) - big in the news when I was in high school. We bombed them.

Good day.

Signed, Rex Parker, King of CrossWorld

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(Court plea, informally) TUESDAY, Jan. 15, 2008 - Stella Daily and Bruce Venzke

Relative difficulty: Medium-Challenging

THEME: SOAPS (71A: This puzzle's theme) - first words of four long theme answers are all brands of soap

Not much to say about this puzzle. Those are all soaps, alright - though I'm going to have to take your word on TONE, which is completely unknown to me. Is it a regional soap? Is there such thing as a "regional soap?" You know, like EDY'S is a regional ice cream and HELLMAN'S is a regional mayo? Just wondering. This puzzle had a good deal of answers I simply didn't know, but in good Tuesday fashion, everything was very gettable from crosses; even the intersecting unknowns (ALEC - 2D: British P.M. _____ Douglas-Home) - and ALANA - 14A: Singer Davis with the 1998 hit "32 Flavors") intersected at an easily guessable letter. So ... there it is.

Theme answers:

• 17A: Joie de vivre (ZEST for life)
• 11D: Lofty place for an academic (IVORY tower)
• 29D: Its academy is in New London, Conn. (COAST Guard)
• 63A: Speaking manner (TONE of voice)

In addition to ALANA and ALEC, I did not know VARESE (6D: Lombardy province or its capital) and, frankly, I'd only vaguely heard of the Old VIC (16A: Old _____, London theater). Never spent a lot of time in London. I'm an Edinburgh man, myself. What is with the cluing on IRS (11A: Org. with a code)? I had BSA in there at first (Boy Scouts of America). Lots of "org."s have "codes." Didn't know OLGA (51A: Daughter of Czar Nicholas I or II), but guessed it easily. Never remember the exact letter combo in EZIO (44A: Singer Pinza) because I know it only from crosswords, but (notice a theme?) got it easily from crosses. Why don't I have anything more interesting to say about this puzzle!? Reboot!

• 14A: Singer Davis with the 1998 hit "32 Flavors" (Alana) - Hey, I was alive and vaguely attentive to pop culture in 1998, what the hell? Is this a song about ice cream?
• 23A: Prank player (rascal) - LOVE that this intersects ALFALFA (9D: "Our Gang" kid) - one of the "Little Rascals" - who were also somehow "Our Gang," though I'm not sure what the relationship is between the two. Maybe this will tell me.
• 26A: "South Park" kid (Kyle) - easy ... for me. Maybe ASOK-esque for you.
• 27A: Preceder of Bell or shell (Taco) - no quiero
• 31A: Speed-happy driver (lead foot) - nice lively phrase
• 43A: "_____ a Tramp" ("Lady and the Tramp" tune) ("He's") - all that, including a repeat of "Tramp," for HE'S??
• 47A: Fantastically wonderful (to die for) - sadly, intersects GRIEF (46D: Feeling of loss), reinflecting the phrase in a decidedly depressing direction.
• 7D: De-squeak (oil) - I thought this clue was a French phrase when I first looked at it. Honest.
• 42D: First drug approved to treat AIDS (AZT) - You don't see this answer very often, which surprises me. Such an interestingly placed "Z." A bit depressing to have this so near TO DIE FOR and GRIEF, though.
• 56D: _____-Tass news agency (Itar) - Always forget this answer. IBAR is the only thing that come to mind. At least it's close.
• 53A: Arctic bird (puffin) - that's just not a very "arctic"-sounding name. Sounds too sunny, happy, optimistic. Maybe that's because "Puffins" is the name of one of my occasional breakfast cereals.
• 59D: Tributary of the Colorado (Gila) - learned it from Crosswords. Know Your Four-Letter Rivers (he said, hypocritically).
• 58D: Court plea, informally (nolo) - as in nolo contendere. Wife botched this small part of the puzzle because she'd never heard of this. She grew up in another country, though, so I feel her pain. If you are a non-Kiwi who has ever tried to do a NZ crossword, you know what it's like to be baffled by culturally-specific non-English phrases - which is to say, you know what it's like to be baffled by Maori words and phrases that your average New Zealander knows instinctively.

See you tomorrow,

Signed, Rex Parker, King of CrossWorld

Today's other puzzles:

• LAT 4:44 (C) - Verna Suit - got stupidly hung up thinking a long answer was a theme answer when it wasn't
• CS 5:17 (C) - Mel Rosen - 58D x/w 61A = ????
• NYS 4:38 (C) - Alan Arbesfeld, "Opening Moves" - something is very wrong when I do the Sun faster than any other puzzle of the day
  

[drawing by Emily Cureton]

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SUNDAY, Jan. 13, 2008 - Stella Daily and Bruce Venzke

Relative difficulty: Easy-Medium

THEME: "Baby Talk" - theme answers are familiar phrases that have their "L"s turned into "W"s, creating wacky phrases, which are then clued

I was groaning audibly (and not in a good way) from the second I got WEST WE FORGET. My only hope - maybe the the rest of the theme answers will feature different forms of "Baby Talk," like a lisp or something ... but no. "W"s for "L"s, all puzzle long. Let me suggest that the kid who says "W" for "L" is also likely to do something similar with "R" - and thus WED ASTRAY, said by an actual baby-talking kid, would pwobabwy sound more like WED ASTWAY. Or maybe that's Tweety Bird I'm thinking of. Whatever. This theme was not especially to my liking.

I had an error - though I assure you this is Not the reason I was unhappy with this puzzle. I was unhappy from the get go, well before I ever made my error. Actually, there were two squares at the end of the puzzle where I had to guess. One was the ARIANA (116A: National airline of Afghanistan) / CERIUM (100D: Metal that may ignite if scratched) intersection - though, to be honest, I was 95% sure about that guess. CERIUM certainly sounded more like a metal than any other form of that word I might put in there, and ARIANA ... I'm pretty sure I've had it in my puzzle in the past year. So I guessed "I" there and was correct. I was not so lucky at the crossing of FREEH (82A: F.B.I. director appointed by Clinton) and PHIZ (79D: Illustrator for Charles Dickens). I had heard FREEH's name a million times, and was sure that it was FREED. Louis FREED. Of course this turned the illustrator's name into more of a rapper's name (P-DIZ), but let's be honest: it was rapper's name to begin with. This intersection of two very oddly spelled proper nouns at an impossible-to-intuit "H" is a sign of weak / desperate construction, and yet - I have no one to blame but myself here, not so much for missing FREEH (god that looks wrong) but for missing PHIZ, which I am 99% sure I've seen in my puzzle before.

Theme answers:

• 28A: The old frontier you and I don't remember? (west we forget)
• 45A: Climate that's copy-protected by law? (patent weather) - patentED weather?
• 65A: Merlin on an Imax screen? (giant wizard)
• 89A: Eyelid moistener at a museum? (Art Winkwetter) - this one hurt most of all
• 107A: Rouse a beloved English queen? (wake Victoria)
• 3D: Better half takes the stage? (wife goes on)
• 6D: Married in error? (wed astray)
• 16D: Tush made of shuttle thread? (weft behind)
• 69D: Stick one's foot in Chardonnay? (toe the wine) - that's almost good
• 75D: Development of amnesia? (memory wane)
• 81D: Fabric that needs serious mending? (sick weave)

I got up late this morning, so I'm going to have to blow through the rest of the puzzle if I don't want blogging to eat significantly into the fat, lazy part of my day. There were many highs and lows - let's check them out.

• 23A: Like some titmice (tufted) - I really really like this clue; my first reaction was "???" Then I got it, and it's perfect.
• 27A: Mark who won the Masters and British Open in 1998 (O'Meara) - a gimme for me, but my wife knows squat about golf, so she's currently downstairs trying to slay the NW corner. I have to say, that "O" was crucial for my getting NATO (1D: Group with a secy. gen.), which I blanked on many times.
• 35A: _____ d'amore (oboe) - my wife's comment, mid-solve: "[laughter] ... well, clearly I have something wrong here." She explained her "error" to me, and I told her it wasn't an error at all. Nice that this intersects with NATALE (4D: Christmas on Capri).
• 60A: Like some grasses (awned) - this one made me wince more than any other. It just ... hurts. Made me long for the days when we'll see PWNED in the puzzle - when gamers take over the universe. PWNED already seems like more a word than AWNED.
• 72A: Like Java man (erect) - I stared at this clue for So long wondering how to say it. Was it hep cat speech?: "Like Java, man. Cool. Crazy." Was "Java man" some animated spokesman for the coffee industry? No, apparently it's an anthropological term for early man. OK.
• 87D: Bond poster (bailsman) - this hurt too, though not as bad as AWNED. Seriously, AWNED is gnawing at me this morning way worse than the whole FREEH/PHIZ phiasco. (I'm now going to put Lupe Fiasco on my iTunes just to set a mood)
• 98A: Cuddly sci-fi critter (Ewok) - I hear he's a character in "Dilbert"...
• 100A: Algonquian tongue (Cree) - wanted OTOE, as I always do. I have an itchy OTOE trigger finger.
• 105A: Mover left or right (arrow key) - good, clever. Had the ARR- and was still blinking at this one for a while.
• 110A: Nocturnal insect (earwig) - gross
• 113A: Buggy drivers (Amish) - we have buggy road signs around this area (nearer to Ithaca), but I've never seen one.
• 118A: Singer Des'_____ (Ree) - Ha ha. Insane. But I knew it, and it's bold, so I like it.
• 35D: Florida county seat (Ocala) - your all-purpose Florida city. Learn it, know it, love it.
• 48D: _____ Epstein, Red Sox G.M. starting in 2002 (Theo) - sweet. See also 67A: Fall mos. (Octs.).
• 56D: Word before and after "a" (mano) - clever. Not sure why I thought that "A" had an accent grave over it. It's a Spanish term, not a French one.
• 58D: Prell competitor (Pert) - I'm sorry, the answer I was looking for was "Head & Shoulders." Better luck next time.
• 63D: Former Israeli president Weizman (Ezer) - did not know, but the crosses worked, so I let it stand.
• 67D: Viscera (offal) - got it Right Off The Bat. Love the clue and the answer. Both horribly beautiful words.
• 88D: Suffix with buck (a-roo) - wanted -EROO. Not sure what the rule is with the A/E in this particular suffix. BUCK-A-ROO, SMACKEROO...
• 90D: Bird whose name sounds like its soft call (nene) - love it. Way to dress up crosswordese in something pretty.
• 104D: Dr. J was one (Sixer) - he sure was. The face (and 'fro) of 70s basketball.
• 106D: Part of DKNY (Karan) - notice that DONNA and KARAN are both five letters.
• 109D: "The Simpsons" bus driver (Otto) - he loves to get blotto.

Breakfast time.

Take care.

Signed, Rex Parker, King of CrossWorld

Today's other puzzles:

• You must do Henry Hook's "Cross Words" puzzle (Boston Globe) and Merl Reagle's "Spaced Out People" puzzle (Philadelphia Inquirer). Go to Ephraim's "Puzzle Pointers" page (always in my sidebar) and get them. Super clever, super fun. I laughed out loud while solving HH's puzzle at least three times, and smiled the most of the rest of the way. I recommend highly bouncy music as an accompaniment to both puzzles. Worked for me. I was using Lupe Fiasco and K-OS, but you can substitute according to your own taste.

[drawings by Emily Cureton]

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WEDNESDAY, Sep. 19, 2007 - Stella Daily and Bruce Venzke

Relative difficulty: Easy-Medium

THEME: Barnyard babies in Australia - first word of each theme answer is a barnyard baby, if your barnyard is in Australia and you raise kangaroos for some reason

In a rush this morning, so sorry to the puzzle authors if I give this short shrift. They closed my daughter's school (literally ... just poof, gone, no school ... crazy hippies!) and so we are in something of a scramble mode to figure out what to do next. Grrr. ANYWAY...

This theme is cute, but there's one problem, and that problem is...



JOEY LAWRENCE (28A: Actor who got his start on TV's "Gimme a Break")

So many things about this answer are irksome / hilarious. First of all, JOEY is totally out of sync with all the other baby animals in the puzzle (CHICK, COLT, CALF) in that you would not find him on a farm in North America. Second, JOEY LAWRENCE is well known enough to be a theme answer in a puzzle??? He "got his start" on TV's "Gimme a Break"? OK, my question is - then what happened to him? Because I couldn't name one damned thing he's been in since. Was he on "Blossom" for a while? My first answer here was GEORGE CLOONEY, but first of all, that didn't fit, and second of all, GEORGE got his start on "The Facts of Life" (with crossword stalwart Charlotte RAE), not "Gimme a Break" (you understand my confusion).

Other theme answers:

• 18A: "Pretty Woman" and "Waiting to Exhale" (chick flicks) - this should have had some qualifier attached to it; the moniker CHICK FLICK is colloquial, not a standard film category. Also, I was surprised to learn that CHICKs dig movies about whores. Interesting.
• 48A: Shooter of westerns (colt revolver)
• 62A: They're exercised when cycling (calf muscles)

OK, moving quickly through the puzzle. Originally had STAG for BOAR (1D: Animal hunted in one of Hercules' 12 labors) and then TCU for ORU (14A: Evangelical sch. with a 4,000+ enrollment). Do they even make AIM (17A: Alternative to Gleem) anymore? I remember it from childhood, so it came easily enough. We briefly considered sending Sahra to the local Jewish school, but you, er, have to be Jewish, so that's a problem. Why am I mentioning this ... oh right, 20A: Shul's shepherd (rabbi). The poor harp seal continues to be the only exemplar of EARLESSness (26A: Like harp seals). I'm disconcerted by how quickly SAHIB came to me (33A: "Master") - I think I know the word only from vaguely racist caricatures of servile Indians. I though that if you "winged" someone, you just sort of grazed him, but apparently, no, you MAIM him (38A: Wing, e.g.). Helen Mirren is hot, so feel free to put her in the puzzle all you want, even if the answer is a total retread like QEII (56A: Oscar-winning role for Helen Mirren, in brief). I was surprised to find out how wide my range of knowledge of salsa names is, as ORTEGA came to me almost instantly for 66A: Rival of Old El Paso, though our salsa of choice is ... Amy's, I think. Or something else organic. Grossest answer in the puzzle (also most unknown to me) = LAC (68A: Useful insect secretion). The very word "secretion" should be banned from the puzzle, not least because it's an anagram of "erections" (plural!).

As for the Downs, CAFTAN (8D: Beach cover-up) is not a word I've seen or thought of in a long time. I think I did not associate it with the beach. I'm not sure what I associated it with. It's clear I haven't given CAFTAN much thought at all. It sounds foreign / religious. I wanted SARONG here. Speaking of foreign (if not religious), why did I know BEY (21D: Old Turkish title) right away? I feel like that word has been sitting in a dusty corner of my brain since the Maleska era. Loved the pairing of ICKES (12D: Clinton adviser Harold) and ICKY (57D: Totally gross), as well as LIARS (52D: Specialists in storytelling?) and YARN (70A: It's hard to believe). Not too happy to see crosswordese like OMOO and YMA (71A: Singer Sumac) and ARNE (36D: "Rule, Britannia" composer). Also, while I love "The Simpsons," I was a bit dubious about D'OH (44D: "What an idiot I am!"). No, not dubious, as the definition fits OK. It's just that DUH fits too, in a way, though perhaps not as well. Anyway, I had DUH for a bit. Lastly, how many beams are there, exactly, that are shaped like letters??? "Z" is a new one on me (37D: Letter-shaped beam).

Favorite answers in the puzzle: the insane LOQUAT (49D: Plumlike Chinese fruit) and the DiMaggio-endorsed MR. COFFEE (39D: Automatic-drip machine maker).

Signed, Rex Parker, King of CrossWorld

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THURSDAY, Aug. 30, 2007 - Victor Fleming and Bruce Venzke

Relative difficulty: Medium

THEME: Who, What, Where, When (but no Why? ... Why?) - four long theme answers begin with each of those interrogative words

Managed to work this out in decent time despite not knowing many of the answers. I actually had one square wrong, at what I consider to be an unfair crossing:

• 21A: Debussy's "Air de _____" ("Lia")
• 4D: _____ acid (old name for hydrochloric acid) (muriatic)

These intersect at the "A," and I've never heard of either of them. That parenthetical remark in the MURIATIC clue is useless. Did that actually clarify things for anyone who is not a chemist? Hmmmph. Annoying. But otherwise, this was a fairly enjoyable puzzle, with four colorful fifteen-letter theme answers:

• 17A: 1961 Connie Francis hit ("Where the Boys Are") - My dad once had a celebrity crush on either Connie Francis or Connie Stevens. One of the Connies. Not Connie Chung. That I know.
• 3D: 1952 Doris Day hit that was an even bigger hit for the Lettermen in 1961 ("When I Fall in Love")
• 12D: "Huh?!" ("What in tarnation!") - awesome old-timey hick-speak.
• 61A: End of a line about friends ("... who needs enemies") - got this with just two letters in place, at a time when most of the grid was just empty space

Despite my not really liking "Seinfeld," 1A: Seinfeld's "sworn enemy" (Newman) was a gimme. Didn't help me much, as the only cross it provided was NEWS (1D: Google heading). Finally found an easy answer - 62D: Part of una semana (dia) - followed by another - 55D: Belt-hole makers (awls); those gave me WHO NEEDS ENEMIES, and I was pretty good from there on out.

Some stuff I didn't know:

• 9D: Suffix with beta (tron) - means nothing to me
• 46D: Mortgagor, e.g. (lienee) - ack, that's one ugly clue / answer pairing.
• 55A: Children's author/photographer Alda (Arlene)
• 44A: _____ Beach, Fla. (Del Ray) - I've heard of it, maybe, but needed many crosses (side note: doesn't it seem like this puzzle has an excess of fill-in-the-blank clues?)
• 25D: Passover month (Nisan) - add an "S," and you get the make of vehicle that I drive
• 18D: Mr. Wickfield's clerk, in literature (Heep) - Uriah HEEP? The only reason I know the name "Uriah HEEP" is because I believe it was the name of a rock band of some sort in the early 80s or possibly earlier. Its literariness is lost on me (and my Ph.D. in literature).
• 5D: Bob _____, young man in Dreiser's "Sister Carrie" (Ames) was another literary failure of mine. Bob AMES is a funny name - reminds me of "Bob Vance, Vance Refrigeration" ("The Office").

More literary ignorance: I thought 42A: Tennyson woman called "the Fair" (Enid) was MAUD (!?). And I actually teaching Tennyson's Arthurian poetry, so this mistake was particularly galling. Further, I did not know 40D: One of the men waiting in "Waiting for Godot" (Vladimir). Writing clues that I knew included 45A: _____ Jordan, who wrote "The Crying Game" (Neil) and 47A: A writer may work on it (spec).

It's a fairly cold-hearted puzzle, with nasty entries like PIRANHAS (16A: Vicious sorts), and SINISTER (19A: Up to no good - too tepid a clue for SINISTER, IMOO), and SNEERS AT (65A: Derides).

NET TV (6D: Web-based service) sounds weird / wrong - like the real answer should be WEB TV. Also weird is 20A: Sterile, in a way (neuter), in that NEUTER is always a verb to me, unless it's describing grammatical gender, I guess. Not too fond of ATL. as an answer for 41A: View from Long Is. Wanted the answer to be STRIP MALLS. Never have any idea how to spell SALCHOW (37A: Eponymous rink jump). Growing up ... in fact, until I was in my mid-30's (which is to say, a couple years ago), I thought it was SOWCOW. Lastly, I call a serious European river foul in the far NE, where I was made to endure the proximity of two of my bitterest foes, 13D: It rises in the Bernese Alps (Aare) and 14D: Battle of the _____, 1914 (Yser). AARE is the sound I make when confronted with yet another European river in four letters with improbable letter combinations.

Signed, Rex Parker, King of CrossWorld

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WEDNESDAY, May 23, 2007 - Bruce Venzke and Stella Daly

Relative difficulty: Easy to Medium

THEME: Quip from a hunter = :(

The only thing that put this puzzle at a Wednesday level of difficulty was its quip-ness - hard to get those long Acrosses until you've filled in a lot of Downs. I actually got the first half of the quip, parts 1 and 2, quickly. Then part 4. The last half of part 3 was the last part to give. But as I said, the non-theme fill was a cinch, more Tuesday than Wednesday. I had a little trouble getting into the NW and finally polishing off the mid-SE, but overall, no sweat. Just over 6 minutes solving time today.

The "quip":

I TRIED TO BUY (21A)
A CAMOUFLAGE SUIT (27A)
BUT I COULDN'T FIND (46A)
ONE ANYWHERE (54A)

Take my wife, please!

The problem with your average quip puzzle (and this one is no better than average) is that non-theme fill tends to suck - all originality is sacrificed on the altar of the quip. Check out the crosswordese: SWAB, HALO, ADEN, ALEE, ESAU, ABED, SASE, TET, ION, OAF, HIED. In the miserable SW corner alone, we have OSLO, NEAR, ERIE, SERA, LAIC, and ORES - a veritable slag heap of craptacular fill. This is not to mention all the highly unimaginative fill, e.g. SHOE, FEAR, CENT, TOE, etc.


Despite its horrible quip nature, this puzzle has some fabulous fill, most notably 24A: Composer Rimsky-Korsakov (Nikolai), whose "Capriccio Espagnol" I listen to often (thanks, Andrew); 49D: Kind of statement, to a programmer (If / Then); and 50D: Vegetarian's stipulation ("No meat"), which is very original. I had -MEAT, and without looking at the clue, I filled in COME AT - NO MEAT is so much better. I'm a fake vegetarian, in that I don't eat meat or poultry, but I eat fish (which technically makes me a "pescavegetarian," but that name is soooo pretentious that I can't bring myself to use it).

BONDAGE (9D: Slave's state) is nice too, though the clue could have been ... spicier. D CELLS was a little tough to uncover (48D: Some batteries). Have D CUPS ever been in the puzzle - would ... they ... pass the breakfast table test? If I saw D CUPS in the puzzle, I would most certainly exclaim HOLY COW (43D: "Geez Louise!"), if not something a little stronger. WADI (7D: Dry riverbed) is a very cool word that I know only from crosswords. There is only one answer in today's grid that I flat out didn't know - 47D: "Almost Paradise" author Susan (Isaacs). The only "Almost Paradise" I know is a generic power ballad from the mid-80's by Ann Wilson (half of Heart, and one of the greatest female rock vocalists of all time) and Mike Reno (uh, who? - oh my God he was the lead singer for Loverboy!).

"Almost paradise
We're knocking on heaven's door
Almost paradise
How could we ask for more?
I swear that I can see forever
In your eyes...
Paradise"

Speaking of cheesy pop songs, I ATE UP everything about the NW corner, especially Mr. SEDAKA (3D: Neil who wrote "Stupid Cupid"), who looks rather awesome standing next to ATOMIC (2D: Like some energy) and BANANA (1D: Yogurt flavor - random clue, btw). I would pay good money to go see "Neil SEDAKA and the ATOMIC BANANA," even if they insisted on closing the show with a cover of "Almost Paradise."

Signed, Rex Parker, King of CrossWorld

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TUESDAY, Feb. 6, 2007 - Stella Daily and Bruce Venzke

Solving time: 4:45

THEME: Breakfast - four theme entries (two horizontal and two vertical, nice) contain breakfast foods in non-breakfast contexts, e.g. 63A: Czar's treasure (Fabergé Egg)

Loved the theme, though I never saw it during the solving experience itself because I torched this puzzle. Super-solvers can scoff at that statement, but this is my first sub-five-minute Tuesday ever. I'm pretty sure I exclaimed "woo hoo!" upon hitting "Done!" and getting the "Thank you for playing" message, despite the fact that it was after 10pm and my wife was just starting to fall asleep in the next room. Did about 10 puzzles yesterday, 5 of them while "watching" my wife's karate practice last night, so I was well warmed up when I tackled this puzzle at just after 10pm.

All the theme answers are great. In addition to FABERGÉ EGG, you've got:

• 17A: Booze (happy juice) - never heard this expression, but I do like it. Is ZIMA (6A: Fruity alcoholic brand) a form of HAPPY JUICE?
  
• 11D: "Apollo 13" co-star (Kevin Bacon) - first theme answer I got, and I thought the puzzle was going to have some "Six Degrees of Kevin Bacon" theme. Alas, no
• 27D: Comment to a goner ("You're toast") - that's the hottest one of all: colloquialicious

I have to say, as I look at this grid, I'm surprised I got through as fast as I did - there are many wriggly little two-word phrases and at least three answers I don't recognize at all:

15A: Land of Esau's descendants (Edom) - oh am I terrible at things Biblical / Hebraic; even when I know them, I cannot spell them
25A: Hopalong Cassidy player William (Boyd) - One for the old folks; I would have gotten [Ellroy anti-hero Kemper]. HA ha, it turns out that the first "William Boyd" that Google recognizes is not this Hopalong guy, but a British author ... born in ACCRA, Ghana. There's a capital I won't soon forget (see last Tuesday's puzzle, Pllllleaaze; a memorable one, that)
24A: Chemistry Nobelist Otto (Hahn) - I know one Hahn, and her name is Hilary.

Then there's the dueling Winnebago clues (when's the last time you saw that in a grid?)

29D: Offshoot of the Winnebagos (Iowas)
35A: Offshoot of the Winnebago tribe (Otoe)

I really wish one of these Winnebago clues had had an answer related to RV-ing.

So much computer-related fill here, what with ASCII (1A: Computer character set, for short) and SPAMS (14A: Bombards with bogus offers) and IMAC (12D: Colorful computer) and of course NERDS (70A: Uncool sorts). There also appears to be a sublimated religious theme here, with ACOLYTE (55A: Church candle lighter) and TEXT (69A: Preacher's reading) and MONKS (13D: "Monty Python and the Holy Grail" figure - speaking of NERDS!), and O GOD (60D: Prayer start) and the Pope's TIARA (37A: Princess' accessory) and, last but not least, ZEUS (6D: Chief Olympian) and his HEIR (59D: Crown prince, e.g.), ARES (44A: Mars' Greek counterpart).

I only had one false entry in this grid: JEANS for JEEPS (18D: Wranglers, e.g.), and that is a total set-up if I ever saw one, because those are both great "J"-answers that fit perfectly. But the awesome "Q"-containing word PIQUED (28A: Sparked, as curiosity) took care of the problem, giving me the "P" I needed to turn JEANS to JEEPS. Other colorful fill includes GAUCHOS (58A: Some cowboys), SCHTICK (21A: Comic's gimmick - so many consonants in SCHTICK!) and AMECHE (9D: Mustachioed Don of classic films). Mustachioed! Why isn't that in the grid?! If I ever construct a puzzle, it will contain MUSTACHIOED, which will be clued [Don Ameche, e.g.]. Hey, WAS (41A: Isn't anymore, cute) not only sits right atop the ARE in ARES, but it's also echoed by the full answer ARE in the western ("S.F.") portion of the grid, 47A: "_____ you kidding?" Innnnnnteresting. You've also got a CAPT (3D: Skipper: Abbr.) and SGTS (61D: Some NCO's) connection. I should stop now, as I'm getting dizzy. I would like to give a final shout-out to AGUE (55D: Malarial symptom) a crossword staple who (I feel) has been unfairly overshadowed lately by his smarmy Italian cousin A DUE. Not to mention TIARA - didn't we call a TIARA moratorium a month or so ago? I don't think I'm ready to lift that particular injunction.

Signed, Rex Parker, King of CrossWorld

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SUNDAY, Jan. 28, 2007 - Victor Fleming and Bruce Venzke

Solving time: untimed, but fast

THEME: "Having Pull" - all theme answers are things that may be pulled

Where was A FAST ONE? ONE'S LEG? MY FINGER!? This theme was cute, if awfully simple. The only real puzzler was 81A (THEME): It may be pulled (client's case file), and even that was inferrable with a handful of crosses. Still, discovering what could be pulled next was enjoyable, and after Saturday's puzzle, I was glad to have the level of difficulty lowered considerably. My favorite theme answer was 49A (THEME): One may be pulled (starting pitcher), which reminds me that baseball season is Just over the horizon (when I can begin to erase the memory of last year's abysmal and colossally disappointing World Series). My friend Matt got Red Sox tickets yesterday, so even though the opponent is lowly Kansas City, I'm very psyched. Never been to Fenway, despite having adopted the Red Sox as my team in the early 80's (when I lived in Central California). After the Super Bowl, the only thing worth noting, sportswise, is the NCAA basketball tournament in March. Then it's glorious April, with opening day and springtime and sunny joyous American love for all. I have no idea why I'm writing about sports right now. Oh, themewise, I also liked OLD SWITCHEROO (35D: It may be pulled), though the clue should read [It may be pulled, with "The"]. "Hey, you pulled OLD SWITCHEROO" makes no sense, unless you are imagining the phrase being uttered by an ESL (3D: Immigrant's class: Abbr.) student or Borat or someone else with an aversion to definite articles.

6D: Yellowish shade (ochre)
38A: Neutral shade (linen)

"What are 'The Colors of Nausea?'" The first of these looks like it's spelled wrong, and I had no idea the latter "color" was a color at all. Thought it was just a very, very hard-to-care-for fabric. LINEN is over in the Portland, OR portion of the puzzle, and borders / intersects some iffy fill. Not fond of either 29D: Abbr. of politeness (pls) - seriously, who writes this? Someone who really hates vowels? - or 30D: Gradually slower, in mus. (rit.). Abbr. next to Abbr. = lazy and ugly. I also don't think much of 44A: Cookout staple (steak) - I don't know what kind of "cookouts" you're going to, but that's pretty high-end fare. Hands up if you had the "K" (from SRI LANKA, 5D: Country that styles itself a "democratic socialist republic") and wrote in the far more plausible and democratic FRANK, as in FRANKfurter, Beans and FRANKs, etc.?

45A: _____-mo (slo)

Here is some tired fill that I would really, really like to see go on a long, long vacation. It should be in the Pantheon, but I just hate it too much. Two other, less groan-inducing bits of Pantheonic fill can be found at 107D: Petrol brand (Esso) - although ESSO did sort of make my wife groan, as in 'ugh, not again' - and the very high-end 119A: Grasshopper stage (imago) - "high-end" because it's a fancy word that has managed to become a crossword staple without becoming a crossword whore (see SLO).

71A: Stu of early TV (Erwin)
61D: Pulitzer-winning Sheehan (Neil)

Usually, when names I don't know cross one another, it's bad, bad news. But here, the "I" that joins these two guys was pretty obvious, saving me the "which vowel goes here" heartache that often attends intersecting stumpers. I don't know Stu ERWIN, but I damn sure know the other TV clues in this grid. 87A: Half of a 1980's TV duo (Allie) was one I got right away. I enjoyed that show in a comfort-food kind of way. I think 90% of that show was shot on that one cheap set that seemed to include the entryway, the stairway, the living room, and the kitchen. How did all those people share that tiny space? One of the daughters looked vaguely like Debbie Gibson, and the other was more reminiscent of Tiffany - these are the categories into which one might have divided girls circa 1986. I forget which of the grown-ups was Kate and which one ALLIE, but I have always had something of a crush on Jane Curtin, despite her work on some pretty hateful shows (see "3rd Rock," e.g.). Tina Fey is my new Jane Curtin. But I digress. The other great TV throwback was 39A: Half of a 1970's TV duo (Starsky). I never watched "STARSKY and Hutch" (on too late for 5-year-old me), though I have a strange desire to Netflix the show, since I am a big fan of crime fiction in general, especially that of the period between when Reagan did his last movie (1964's The Killers, hot!) and when Reagan became president. I am currently working my way through "Kojak" - I'm five eps in and he has yet to suck on a lollipop or say "Who Loves Ya, Baby?" - and I've got "The Rockford Files" waiting in the wings. One more campy TV answer: 26D: Linda of soaps (Dano), which, very sadly, I knew instantly.

92A: Fireplace receptacle (ashpan)

Now comes the part of the show where I talk about words I don't know. Had ASHCAN here, 'cause I knew that was something, but ASHPAN feels awfully made up. British? Sandy hadn't heard of it, and she's Kiwi, which is almost British. Speaking of British, went to see The Queen last night, and it was fantastic - one of the best-made films I've seen in a good, long while. And I managed to enjoy it despite the fact that apparently people are raised in barns these days and think chatting with their spouses during quiet moments of the film is OK. Where was I? Oh, words I don't know. How about 118A: Syrian leader (Assad)? Is that a guy's name? Yes, Bashar ASSAD is the leader of Syria, indeed. Why did you all make his name cross FATWAS (95D: Mullahs' calls) and THEISM (96D: Basic belief), and then, worst of all, have it sitting on top of SMOKE (122A: Content of some rings). There's an entire season of "24" plotted out in this one square inch of grid. Try a little sensitivity ... or Try a Little Tenderness, whichever. More trouble: I just told you all (recently) that I get all the ADEN, OMAN, ASSAN, OREN, OREM, ORAN, etc.-type answers confused, constantly. And then today I had to fight my way through not one but two of them: 37D: Gulf of _____, off the Horn of Africa (Aden) and 120A: Arab league member (Oman). If I see "Gulf" or "Horn" or "Cape," I know I'm in trouble. But in today's case, crosses took care of all the vowel ambiguity that normally plagues me with these answers. Speaking of geographical ignorance, a river clue held me up for a bit (one of two minor sticking points in this puzzle): I knew that 53D: Köln's river started with RH-, but to ignorant me, that meant RHINE or RHONE. Didn't know I'd be faced with the German spelling of the former, RHEIN, but pieced it together eventually. I still have no idea how BEEF can be an answer for 70D: Kick. Had to ask my wife what kind of "literary monogram" EAP (113D) was (Poe, duh). If I'd ever heard of LITTLE ME (84D: 1962 musical co-directed by Bob Fosse), it was a long time ago in a galaxy far, far away. I wanted to squeeze ORPHAN ANNIE into those last two squares. For all I know, LITTLE ME starred NIA Long (111D: Actress Long), of whom I'd also never heard. I have a vague feeling, though, that I have blogged about never having of heard of this same actress before, which would mean that I've heard of her. My instinct is to say that there's only one actress named Long, and her first name is Shelley, but my instinct also tells me that I have written those very same words before. Weird.

Final thoughts: Didn't know that LBJ was a VIRGO (89A: Lyndon Johnson, by birth), and can't say that I really care. Don't know if it's good or bad to see the "H-added" spelling of SENHOR/A again (34A: Lady from Ipanema) - I'm going to say good, as I got it instantly, and like the song "Girl from Ipanema." Not sure how I feel about ERRATA (9D: Text miscues) and SERRATE (77A: Saw-edged) being in the same grid - little too much ERRAT. As with DANO (above), I am mildly embarrassed that I got TEEN IDOL (106A: Tiger Beat topic) almost instantly (with just the "T" in place). I've never even read that magazine, not once, I swear. I can't see the title Tiger Beat without picturing Leif Garrett, for some reason, although the phrase TEEN IDOL is more apt to make me picture Shaun or David Cassidy. Lastly, I want to give a warm welcome to OSIER (6A: Wicker willow) - one of my favorite "learned-it-from-the-crosswords" words and by far my favorite basket-making material - way better than that cheap RAFFIA crap.

Signed, Rex Parker, King of CrossWorld

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TUESDAY, Nov. 21, 2006 - Stella Daily and Bruce Venzke

Solving time: 8-ish (on Across Lite)

THEME: "Orchestra" - final words of three long theme entries are BRASS, STRINGS, and WINDS, with the theme ORCHESTRA (58A) also in the grid

First, a correction: at the American Crossword Puzzle Tournament, competitors solve on paper, not the computer. I misunderstood someone's comment at another site. So sorry for yesterday's misinformation.

Second, I have said before, many times, maybe here, certainly elsewhere, that the non-Jerry "Seinfeld" actors are Not funny. I used to have to point to the string of horrid and / or failed vanity sitcom projects to make my point. Now I can just point to this.

Third, I have a question about the phrase "the fourth of never," which I used last night for some reason, to the surprise of my wife who had just heard the phrase used earlier in the day by one of her students. I don't think it's something I've ever said before, and in fact I'm not sure that the proper phrase isn't "fifth of never" or "twelfth of never." Oh, there's a song called "The Twelfth of Never" by, it looks like, Johnny Mathis, and possibly Keith Urban. Maybe Nina Simone sang it too. Oh ick, here's an online Casio keyboard version of some kind. It's actually written by Paul Francis Weber and Jerry Livingstone. It's pretty sappy. OK, back to puzzle. [late addendum: how's this for irony?: I've barely heard of the song "The Twelfth of Never," and yet Two of my favorite musical artists and biggest celebrity crushes have recorded it - why was I not informed? I prefer Dolly Parton's version to Olivia Newton-John's, but it's a pretty close call. The very best version (from what I could gather from the 30-second snippets @ iTunes) is by Nina Simone, yet Another one of my idols. The song just isn't that strong, but if these women are singing, I'm listening. Seriously, I'm downloading the songs right now.]

Today's theme was very clever, neat, tidy, musical. Nice. Couldn't ask for more from a Tuesday puzzle. I especially like that 20A (THEME): Generals and such (military brass) is crossed at the "Y" by 9D: Certain well-traveled child (army brat). Must move even more quickly today, as I'm on Sahra-patrol (she's out of school for the T-giving week, and she and I are due at Denny's to eat breakfast with mommy's students in about a 1/2 hour!).

4D: Morales of "NYPD Blue" (Esai)
41A: Architect Saarinen (Eero)
63A: Pitcher (ewer)

Gimme an "E"! Who opened the "E" pen at Krosswordese Korner? Pantheon stalwarts are running amok. In addition to these "E" words, we have EDER (15A), ERE (2D), EGO (34D), and EX-MET (43A) (that last one -> ouch). I don't know if I'm annoyed by all the conventional fill or amused by the "E" party. It's a close call. There's an abundance of tired fill that doesn't start with "E" - NTWT (55D), AREA (56D), ARIA (53D) [seriously, AREA and ARIA... and in the same neck of the puzzle woods? OK], ODEA (7D) and the old-school, Maleska-era throwback ABIE (19D). This fairly unimaginative short fill is, I'm happy to say, more than made up for by generous interesting longer fill, including ORGIES (22D) and PENMANSHIP (30D), which are two great tastes that taste great together.

6D: Sonnet part (sestet)

Mmmm, sonnet parts. I like the dark meat! Seriously, I do like that SESTET not only means a SIX-line chunk of poetry, but it has SIX letters in it, AND is positioned here at SIX-Down. 6-6-6. Symmetry! And evil...

The Petrarchan sonnet is typically described as having two parts: the octet and the sestet (first eight and last six lines, respectively). Rhyme scheme would usually change at the octet/sestet break. Here is a sonnet by Sir Philip Sidney, the first sonnet from his sonnet sequence Astrophil & Stella. Spelling is modernized, for your pleasure.

Loving in truth, and fain in verse my love to show,
That she (dear She) might take some pleasure of my pain:
Pleasure might cause her read, reading might make her know,
Knowledge might pity win, and pity grace obtain;
I sought fit words to paint the blackest face of woe,
Studying inventions fine, her wits to entertain:
Oft turning others' leaves, to see if thence would flow
Some fresh and fruitful showers upon my sun-burned brain.
But words came halting forth, wanting Invention's stay,
Invention, Nature's child, fled step-dame Study's blows,
And others' feet still seemed but strangers in my way.
Thus, great with child to speak, and helpless in my throes,
Biting my truant pen, beating myself for spite--
"Fool," said my Muse to me, "look in thy heart and write."

I love this poem (as Renaissance poems go), mainly for the line "I sought fit words to paint the blackest face of woe," but also for the weird, urgent pace of the end, which has a crazy masochistic birthing metaphor going on before it settles into the very simple last line. ANYway...

31D: German chancellor Merkel (Angela)

Again. Damn, she gets a lot of puzzle action for a six-letter answer.

49A: One working on the margin, briefly? (Arb)

I am not sure I know what this is short for. Isn't this what Arby's employees proudly call themselves? No, "anonymous" says it's "arbitrager." If it involves money or business in any way, then I am useless. I do not even like managing my own money (much). I have a guy who handles that. Seriously.

51A: Not, to a Scot (Nae!)
45D: Scottish hillside (Brae!)

As in, "NAE! I wilnae go o'er yon BRAE, ye daft wee bairn!" Cue the requisite shot of Willie!:
49D: Playwright Fugard (Athol)

Best name, because it sounds like a lisping guy is shouting profanity. In this picture, we see that ATHOL has a certain unfortunate Manson-ish quality. I know one thing about Athol Fugard. OK, two. One, he is (was?... no, is) South African. Two, he wrote a play called Master Harold and the Boys, which I think was on Broadway starring Matthew Broderick at some point, and which I know I saw at the Ashland, Oregon Shakespeare festival when my entire H.S. English class went on a week-long field-trip there in 1986 (or maybe 1987 - we went both years). It was ... good? I don't remember. I think it's about white guilt over Apartheid. I remember Shakespeare better.

Signed, Rex Parker, King of CrossWorld

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