Futile batting statlines, in baseball lingo / THU 12-19-24 / Parenthetical on four #1 albums since 2021 / Laser-focused mindset / Sticky treats, in more ways than one? / Hedgehog lookalikes / Nantz's longtime N.F.L. commentating partner / Coding catchall

Constructor: Brandon Koppy

Relative difficulty: Easy-Medium

THEME: SCREEN / SHARES (45A: With 45-Down, displays during an online presentation ... or a hint to three pairs of answers in this puzzle) — answers with the initials "T.V." cross at their first letter, resulting in three "TV" squares—so the first letters of the two words in each theme answer are a kind of "screen" (TV), and those letters "share" one box:

Theme answers:

• TUNNEL / VISION (11A: Laser-focused mindset)
• TAYLOR'S / VERSION (22A: Parenthetical on four #1 albums since 2021)
• TERMINAL / VELOCITY (31A: Speed limit, of a sort)

Word of the Day: OH-FERS (36D: Futile batting statlines, in baseball lingo) —

O-fer

Definition

Descriptive of a batter who fails to get a hit in any number of at-bats in a game or series of games. "Bob Buhl owns the worst O-fer in major league history-0 for 88 over two seasons." (Sports Illustrated, June 7, 2004). Davey Johnson, commenting on Rafael Palmeiro (quoted in The Baltimore Sun, Aug. 28, 1997): "If he goes O-fer, he's going to get down on himself." Sometimes spelled "ofer". Syn. O-for; oh-for; oh-fer, 1; 0-fer.

Etymology

The term is created from "0 [zero] for," as one would say when speaking of an "0 for 3" game. (Dickson Baseball Dictionary)

• • •

Well you had me ... and then you lost me. Right at the end. Goal line fumble (to use a sports term, which this puzzle *really* seems to like). I guess *I* was the one who fumbled, but it feels like the puzzle fumbled. In short, I thought the revealer execution was garbage, in that it was built exactly like the rest of the theme answers (with Across + Down answers crossing at their first letter), except the "T/V" gimmick was abandoned in favor of ... just an ordinary single letter ("S")? To set up the "T/V" pattern and then arbitrarily break it ifor the revealer (even though You Have Built Your Revealer With Exactly The Same Structure) felt cheap. Like a cheap trick. That "T/V" non-appearance befuddled me way more than the theme itself actually did—I wrote that (erroneous) "T/V" square in pretty quickly when I saw the revealer had the same first-letter-shared structure as the other themers. So the revealer wouldn't come, and then, well, that corner was not exactly the friendliest, with the weird word COYEST (when do you rank coyness?) and the absolutely bonkers clue on GESTATE (60A: Baby bear?)—so if you "bear" ("carry") a "baby," you GESTATE it ... in your womb? Torture. Syntactically, anyway—torture. So I basically irised in on that non-"T/V" square, the shared "S" in SCREEN SHARES, and finally I absolutely had to ditch the "T/V" and then I could see the actual revealer. I know that the revealer clue clearly says "a hint to three pairs of answers," and a "T/V" in the revealer's first square would've made it four, but who goes back and counts? Or even thinks about that number? Bah. That non-"T/V" shared square felt like a let-down and a betrayal, a breach of contract. Also, profoundly anticlimactic, which is sad, because I think the revealer itself is great, and the theme is really well done overall. I mostly enjoyed myself ... until I entered that SE corner, and then—meh and bah and boo.

Leaving the particular structure of the revealer out of it, I thought the theme was clever and well-executed. I particularly like the grid structure—mirror symmetry along the NW-to-SE axis—and the fact that all the "TV"s line up along that axis. Uncovering the gimmick wasn't too tough today. Some bumbling at first in the NW corner (pretty normal), and then—after imagining that [Some mustangs] were T-TOPS (?) and that a [Commoner] was a PEON—I hit 22A: Parenthetical on four #1 albums since 2021 with -AY- in place, and I thought "TAYLOR'S Version! ... but where's the 'version'? ... huh, must not be right." I went back up in the NW corner, got TUNNEL, wondered where "vision" had got to, and then *finally* looked Down, saw the cross-reference, and realized the VISION (and the VERSION) were right there all along, crossing the TUNNEL (and the TAYLOR'S) at the first letter. 

A "TV" rebus, cool. And again, SCREEN SHARES is a nice revealer ... just not the way it's executed in the grid, which feels like the COYEST trick I've ever seen (hey, maybe COYEST is a word?). I probably should've made "TAYLOR'S / VERSION" the Word of the Day. Famously, Taylor Swift rerecorded a bunch of her early albums in order to gain ownership of the material. So those rerecorded albums have "(TAYLOR'S VERSION)" appended to their titles.

I pay far less attention to professional sports than I used to when I was a kid (obsessed! with all the majors except hockey, which we did not have in California, then, and which I couldn't be bothered to care about when it finally did come). So sports terminology and slang is generally familiar to me, but I'm very aware that that is not the case for many solvers, so when I see it in droves, in spades, in avalanches, I start to feel for those non-sports folks. Today, I really felt for them when OH-FERS (36D: Futile batting statlines, in baseball lingo) ended up right next to POSTS UP (37D: Hangs out for a while), a bizarrely-spelled (and awkwardly clued) baseball term right alongside what I assume is a basketball term. I mean, there's nothing in the clue about basketball, but the only place I know the phrase POSTS UP from is basketball. To "post up" means "to take up a position against a defender in the post in basketball while standing with one's back to the basket" (merriam-webster.com). Centers or other big men often are said to be "hanging out in the (low) post." If there is some non-basketball meaning of POSTS UP that equates the term with "hanging out," I don't know of it, and neither do the online dictionaries I'm looking at. Insane clue for POSTS UP. [update: Urban Dictionary seems to know this “hang out” definition, and wiktionary has “occupy a position” as its fourth def]. And as for OH-FERS, yikes. I would ... not spell "O" like that. The "O" (said as the letter "O") stands for zero, so putting an "H" on it makes it look *ridiculous*. Apparently someone somewhere decided you could spell it that way if you wanted, but that is not the common way to spell it, and I feel sorry for the undoubtedly many solvers for whom that entire clue and answer was inscrutable. And then to have AND ONE (42D: Free throw after a basket) and the WTA (58D: Org. for Coco Gauff) and Phil SIMMS (14D: Nantz's longtime N.F.L. commentating partner) also in the grid? Even I, a sports non-hater, thought the puzzle was going overboard.

More:

• 6A: Comedian Ken of "The Masked Singer" (JEONG) — me: "how the **** would I know, who even watches that **** show, come on!" Also me, seconds later: "Oh, it's just Ken JEONG. He's on that show? Huh."
• 35A: Sticky treats, in more ways than one? (POPSICLES) — a great clue, and frankly, I'm not sure it even needs the "?"—they do have sticks, so they are stick-y. I know we don't use the term "sticky" that way, but it's Thursday, trust me to figure it out.

• 9D: Burning man? (NERO) — ugh, this one made about as much intuitive sense as [Baby bear?]. NERO (famously, probably apocryphally) fiddled while Rome burned. According to History dot com, "the fiddle didn't exist in ancient Rome." So there's that. But back to the clue—I guess NERO is a man *associated* with "burning"? [Grimace] [resigned headshake] [moving on]
• 33D: Hedgehog lookalikes (ECHIDNAS) — my first instinct is always to spell this "ECHINDAS" (rhymes with "Lindas"?). I don't know why. Also, I just found out that Sonic the Hedgehog 3 opens tomorrow. No idea if any ECHIDNAS are involved, as I can't imagine caring about this franchise at all, for any reason. Like, if you made a movie in a lab specifically designed to keep me away, this would be that movie. If there were an interest level below zero, that would be my interest level. In related news, I'm driving over an hour today to see All We Imagine As Light, a truly awful / forgettable / confusable title, but apparently one of the best movies of the year (the very best, according to Sight + Sound). If there are ECHIDNAS in it, I'll let you know.

Time for Holiday Pet Pics now 

(again, this year's submissions are closed, thank you!)

Ruby has had enough of the photo sessions and would like you to just throw the damned ball already

[Thanks, Mark]

Sadie has also had enough of the photo shoot. She seems calm here, but you can tell that she's about to bust out of there and take Santa with her. 

[Thanks, Juliann]

I know this is the gaze of a dog (Fenway) who just wants you to hurry up and finish your puzzle already so you all can go for a run, but when I look at this sweet face, all I feel is calm. My jaw unclenches, my shoulders relax. All is calm, all is Fenway. 

[Thanks, Sarah]

From Fenway to a couple of more bat-sport pets—the brothers Baseball and Cricket. They spend their days lounging, purring, sleeping, and failing to understand the rules of each other's respective sports

[Thanks, Mike]

And finally today we have Simon & Scout, seen here taking a much-deserved break from their busy touring schedule for "Simon & Scout's Tap-Dancing Holiday Revue!"

[Thanks, Pamela]

See you next time.

Signed, Rex Parker, King of CrossWorld

[Follow Rex Parker on BlueSky and Facebook]