Beatles sobriquet / WED 9-17-25 / Ditto, in footnotes / Like some short tennis matches / Sorcerous elder of folklore / Anime style involving giant robots / Rocksteady precursor / Vodka cocktails with orange liqueur and lime juice / State trees of North Dakota / Brand whose name is derived from the French phrase "sans caféine" / "Shreds," in winter sports lingo

Constructor: Jackson Matz

Relative difficulty: Medium

THEME: "24-KARAT MAGIC" (43A: Grammy-winning Bruno Mars album of 2016 ... or a hint to an unusual feature of this puzzle's answer grid) — there are 24 "K"s in the grid (not sure why that's "magic")  

Theme answers:

• 43D: Like some short tennis matches (2-SET)
• 26D: Beatles sobriquet (FAB 4)
• anything with a "K"?

Word of the Day: MECHA (8D: Anime style involving giant robots) —

In science fiction, mecha (Japanese: メカ, Hepburn: meka) or mechs are giant robots or machines, typically depicted as piloted, humanoid walking vehicles. The term was first used in Japanese after shortening the English loanword 'mechanism' (メカニズム, mekanizumu) or 'mechanical' (メカニカル, mekanikaru), but the meaning in Japanese is more inclusive, and 'robot' (ロボット, robotto) or 'giant robot' is the narrower term.

Real mechs vary greatly in size and shape, but are distinguished from vehicles by their biomorphic appearance, and are often much larger than human beings. Different subgenres exist, with varying connotations of realism. The concept of Super Robot and Real Robot are two such examples found in Japanese anime and manga.

Real-world piloted robots or non-robots robotic platforms, existing or planned, may also be called "mechs". In Japanese, "mechs" may refer to mobile machinery or vehicles (not including aircraft, cars, motorcycles and HGV) in general, piloted or otherwise. (wikipedia)

• • •

LOL I undervalued Bruno Mars's "magic" by a full 10K. I took one look at the first cross, 43D: Like some short tennis matches and wrote in "1-SET." Two-set matches are so common in women's tennis that it never occurred to me to think of them as "short." I figured the puzzle was using "short" to mean "shorter than professional matches," like maybe you just decided to play a quick "match" at the club or something. You can see here that ONESET has appeared in the NYTXW a bunch in the past, and that the cluing is roughly equivalent to today's clue:

"14-KARAT" is a common enough purity measurement, and since I definitely was not paying attention to Bruno Mars albums 9 years ago ... ta da!? Failure! When I tell you I did not enjoy this puzzle much at all, please understand it has nothing to do with my error. I was wincing at the bad fill *way* before that—pretty much from the jump. I was like ten answers in when I first thought "oof, why is the fill so bad?" Actually, I was probably only three answers in: No regular-old mid-week puzzle should have LEOI as an answer unless the constructor is really desperate *and* the rest of the grid is pretty much spotless. It's the worst kind of crosswordese, and I would call it "lazy" in most cases, but today, after finishing the puzzle, at least I know why it was here, and why all the subpar / odd / unpleasant fill is here: so that we can get the full complement of 24 "K"s into the grid. Was it worth it? Not for me. KNOCK KNOCK and KNICK KNACK just aren't that interesting, and LEOI ATAD ACK IDEM HAH AGER EBOOK KERRI ARG DASANIS (plural!), ACTI EIEIO ECIG ... none of that was enjoyable. I love the kookiness of the letter "K" but ... not this much. 

[Bizarrely, LEOI seems to have gotten more popular in the Shortz Era; would not have guessed that]

Lotta names today, though only a small handful gave me trouble. I know the name KEKE Palmer because I saw and loved Nope, but I definitely needed to get the first two letters from crosses in order to remember the name. As for Jo KOY, nope (!), nothing. I checked and rechecked those crosses to make sure it couldn't be anything else. He seems to be most famous for bombing spectacularly as the host of the Golden Globe awards in 2024. I can't believe the Golden Globes are even still a thing. If you go to that awards show, I say you get what you deserve. Anyway, KOY is a debut, no surprise. All the other names in the puzzle are pretty big (RIHANNA, KARATE KID, LENA Dunham, Brooks & DUNN, etc.), although KERRI Strug is increasingly bygone. Did you know that the only other KERRI to appear in the NYTXW is also an Olympic gold medalist??! KERRI Walsh Jennings is an Olympic beach volleyball player (three golds and a bronze).

No real struggle points today. Always unsure about the exact spelling of "kamikaze" so I left the second and third vowels blank and let the crosses do the work (27A: Vodka cocktails with orange liqueur and lime juice). Also never sure of the last letter on KRONA (71A: Swedish coin), because the Norwegian coin is, in fact, a KRONE, so I waited for the cross there as well. Went looking for a sobriquet (i.e. nickname) for *individual* Beatles before I realized it was going to be a "sobriquet" for the whole band (FAB 4). Pretty sure I had AGAR before AGER. Both answers are regrettable crosswordese, but AGAR is a thickener, not a ripening agent. Really enjoyed seeing AKIRA Kurosawa, as he's among the greatest directors of all time, up there with Hitchcock and Varda and Kurosawa's own countryman, OZU, who (as I apparently do not tire of pointing out) has somehow still never appeared in the NYTXW. It's weird to me that the puzzle has used UZO (Aduba) nine times, but has never once used the legendary Japanese director whose name is just the same letters in reverse.

What else?:

• 1A: State trees of North Dakota (ELMS) — no idea. I thought "probably ELMS" because, well, four letters, trees ... why not? But then I thought of OAKS, and YEWS, and the fact that I know nothing about the flora of North Dakota, so I waited for crosses to help me out. Sadly, the first cross was no help, as I wanted the Club to be SAMS Club (1D: ___ Club).
• 21A: Brand whose name is derived from the French phrase "sans caféine" (SANKA) — most facts that are billed as "fun facts" are not in fact "fun," but this one is. Do people under 45 even know what SANKA is? Is it still around? I feel like it was a staple of 1970s-80s cupboards, but that's probably just because that's when I was watching a lot of TV and saw the ad campaigns.

[alternate clue for 2-Down: [Former 21-Down pitchwoman Horne]]

• 12D: Sorcerous elder of folklore (CRONE) — wow, "sorcerous," You don't see that word very often. This is its first use in a NYTXW clue. (Never appeared as an answer, unsurprisingly)
• 44D: Contrite answer to "Who put the empty ice cream carton back in the freezer?" ("I DID") — I'll have you know that I was not contrite.
• 58D: Outie's counterpart (INNIE) — Severance clue when!?!

That's all. See you next time.

Signed, Rex Parker, King of CrossWorld

[Follow Rex Parker on BlueSky and Facebook and Letterboxd]
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Battleship corner / FRI 9-20-24 / Lawbreakers, informally / Four-year-old in pig tales? / Apt name for a successful crypto investor? / Philosophy influenced by Aristotle's concept of the Unmoved Mover / Plural form decried by staunch "Star Wars" fans / Windy flight?

Constructor: Jackson Matz

Relative difficulty: Easy-Medium

THEME: none 

Word of the Day: Bella THORNE (53A: Actress Bella of Disney's "Shake It Up") —

Annabella Avery Thorne (born October 8, 1997) is an American actress, singer, and writer. She first received recognition for her roles as Margaux Darling in the series Dirty Sexy Money (2007–2008) and as Ruthy Spivey in the drama series My Own Worst Enemy (2009), the latter of which earned her a Young Artist Award.

Thorne gained prominence for her role as CeCe Jones on the Disney Channel series Shake It Up (2010–2013), for which she received several awards and nominations, including winning an Imagen Award. Thorne has since appeared in numerous feature films, including Blended (2014), Alvin and the Chipmunks: The Road Chip (2015), The Babysitter film series (2017–2020). She received praise for her roles in The DUFF (2015), Amityville: The Awakening (2017), and Infamous (2020). Thorne also led the drama series Famous in Love (2017–2018), for which she received nominations from the Teen Choice Awards.

Outside of acting, Thorne has ventured into music; she released her debut single, "Watch Me" in 2011, which charted at 86 on the US Billboard Hot 100. She has since released the EP Made in Japan in 2012 and the EP Jersey in 2014. She made her directorial debut in 2019, directing the adult film Her & Him, which garnered positive reviews and won a Pornhub Visionary Award. (wikipedia)

• • •

Hard to follow yesterday's barnburner, but this one felt particularly pale. The marquees just don't ... marquee enough. The 15s are all solid, but only one of them really shines—and it's the one I got within the first 10 seconds or so: a promising beginning that was never matched again. That beginning was probably the most interesting and strangest part of my solve. I read 1A: Philosophy influenced by Aristotle's concept of the Unmoved Mover (THEISM) and thought "well I don't know that, but it's probably an -ISM." So I wrote in -ISM and checked the crosses. And ... 1-2-3 blast off!

It felt like a trap. Was I ... MISSING THE POINT? Or did I really just rocket across the grid off a single letter in a hypothesized suffix? Turns out, the latter, which was fun. Always fun to get a big whoosh like that.  A similar transgrid experience soon followed.

As you can see, I was slightly less sure about THANKSGIVING DAY, so had to check it with crosses (namely DYADS). I knew the Lions played every Thanksgiving, but I thought maybe there was some wacky name for that game, some kind of portmanteau, like THANKSLIONSBOWL or something. But no, it's simply the date of the game, THANKSGIVING DAY. Anyway, whoosh whoosh, which I usually like, but after this initial rush things slowed back down to normal Friday levels, and the highs just never got very high. I actually like the shorter 11s today better than I like all the 15s—PESCETARIAN paired with HARD AS A ROCK ... a fish-eater with great abs, is what I'm imagining. You might be imagining something racier. Speaking of something racier, did you know Bella THORNE directed an "adult film" called Her & Him? It's true! It won a PornHub Visionary Award, which is a thing that exists, apparently. I seem to have missed THORNE's career almost entirely, what with Disney and porn being things that are generally off my radar these days. She's very famous, I just (generationally) missed her. When I see THORNE, I think of mid-century humor writer THORNE Smith, that's how old I am.

There were a few shorter things that put me off the grid (when your marquee stuff doesn't sizzle, then problems in the short stuff start to stand out). Worst of all was HAVOCS ... as a verb? (33A: Lays waste to). I mean, it's terrible as a plural noun, but it's virtually nonsensical as a verb. I assume this verbal meaning of HAVOCS is dictionary-attested, somewhere, but yikes. Yeah, Google's dictionary source (Oxford Languages) has this verb version of "havoc" as explicitly "Archaic." Merriam-Webster dot com, however, doesn't tag it that way—just has it as a regular word— so ... OK, I guess this is a thing "havoc" means, but literally never, nowhere, by anyone, in any situation have I heard this, so ... fun. I have heard SOPS as a verb, but I'm never gonna like it. I can tolerate SOP in the verb phrase "to sop up," but for me SOPS (on its own) wants to be a plural noun (meaning, roughly, "bribes"). SOPS is, in general, just a wholly unappealing word, right up there with "moist" (which at least has delicious cake connotations). So SOPS / PERPS was a frowny-face from me, as was the clue on EXES, what the hell??? (8D: People for whom a "no contact" rule might apply). I'm not sure exactly what "rule" this clue is referring to, but a "No contact" order is legal means of protecting (primarily) women from abusive partners (frequently EXES). Why would you evoke that with your clue? I'm sure there are other reasons for a "no contact" order, but my one time on jury duty involved a case where a guy violated his "no contact" order and ... he wasn't a nice guy. There are so many nicer, less trauma-adjacent ways to clue EXES. Bizarre cluing choice here. Also bizarre: JEDIS (41D: Plural form decried by staunch "Star Wars" fans). I mean, your clue is basically telling me "yeah, this is a trash plural," so ... treat it that way (i.e. don't use it). 

[24A: Gunty who wrote "The Rabbit Hutch," winner of the 2022 National Book Award for Fiction]

More things:

• 7A: Four-year-old in pig tales? (PEPPA) — fictional pigs ... I got Wilbur ... I got, I dunno, Piglet? And then I'm out. PEPPA Pig is a phenomenon that I just missed. My daughter would've been about the right age for it when it first hit the States ('05), but she generally did not watch commercial children's TV. She didn't watch TV much at all, though she did have a semi-hilarious addiction to watching DVDs of Sabrina the Teenage Witch (the series starring Melissa Joan Hart that ran '96-'03—which was, to our credit as parents, a very good show). But PEPPA Pig, no. So I needed some crosses to get PEPPA.

["This is a school, not a bordello"—RIP Martin Mull]

• 15A: Members of the family Passeridae (SPARROWS) — knew this was a bird family, and guessed SPARROWS correctly, but I was very aware, as I was writing it in, that SWALLOWS also fit.
• 23A: Pilot productions? (PENS) — Pilot is a company that makes PENS, so that's what that's about.
• 27A: Industry that emerged in the 1970s (GAMING) — wow, "industry" had me thinking something more ... industrial. Interesting / toughish clue.
• 30A: Windy flight? (SPIRAL STAIRCASE) — kind of meh as an answer, but the misdirective clue is kind of fun (not windy like Chicago, but win- (rhymes with "vine") -dy like a winding ... staircase, actually; or a long and winding road, if that's more your thing)

• 34A: Option for a backpacker (HOSTEL) — had the "H" and wanted HIKING. "Option" is not a great option here, as OPT is already in the grid (19D: Elect). 
• 35A: Apt name for a successful crypto investor? (ERICH) — unless he pronounces his name E-RICH (like he's a rapper or something), then no, unapt, boo to this clue. It's only "apt" if it sounds right, and this doesn't sound right.
• 51A: Unwelcome sight in musical stairs (NO SEATS) — very frowny face drawn next to this answer on my print-out. Not a phrase that's strong enough to stand alone.
• 28D: Kind of number represented by the equation M = v/c (MACH) — so ... kind of number represented by "M." So ... "M" ... it's just "M." That's what the "M" stands for. The "M" stands for MACH. Clue could've just been [M, in aeronautics]. (MACH 1 = the speed of sound, represented by the "c" in today's "equation")
• 30A: A "whole" thing (SHEBANG) — Ugh to "A" here. There is no "shebang" that is not preceded by "the" and "whole," so "A" is an absurdity. A SHEBANG implies multiple SHEBANGS, and ... no. Unless you mean this SHEBANGS:

• 32D: Battleship corner (A-ONE) — despite thinking of the "Battleship" game almost immediately, I didn't get this one until I had it down to A-NE, and even then I was like "... who's ANNE and what is she doing in the corner of a battleship?" I haven't looked at a "Battleship" board in forever, so I assume that A1 is somehow a ... corner of that board. OK, yeah, here we go:

Hope this puzzle didn't havoc you (am I saying that right?). See you next time.

Signed, Rex Parker, King of CrossWorld

[Follow Rex Parker on Twitter and Facebook]

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Sluglike "Star Wars" bad guy / WED 7-31-24 / Increases sharply / Video streaming giant / Like 10%-fat beef / Man, on the Isle of Man / Duck delicacy / What it would be a mistake to write twice? / Vaccine, informally / Passionately discuss minutiae, with "out"

Constructor: Jackson Matz and Ben Matz

Relative difficulty: Easy

THEME: "UNDER THE SEA" (59A: Song from "The Little Mermaid" that's a phonetic hint to interpreting the answers to the starred clues) — four Down answers have "C" appended to the beginning (giving you different, wrong-looking answers in the grid); so the actual answer to the clue appears (literally) under the "C":

Theme answers:

• (C) OVERCHARGE (25D: *Rip off)
• (C) RAMPS UP (18D: *Increases sharply)
• (C) LEAN-CUT (31D: *Like 10%-fat beef)
• (C) LOSING TIME (11D: *Not moving fast enough)

Word of the Day: Manx (inspired by the clue for BLOKE—6A: Man, on the Isle of Man) —

Manx (endonym: Gaelg or Gailck, pronounced [ɡilɡ, geːlɡ] or [gilk]), also known as Manx Gaelic, is a Gaelic language of the insular Celtic branch of the Celtic language family, itself a branch of the Indo-European language family. Manx is the historical language of the Manx people.

Although few children native to the Isle of Man speak Manx as a first language, there has been a steady increase in the number of speakers since the death of Ned Maddrell in 1974. He was considered to be the last speaker to grow up in a Manx-speaking community environment. Despite this, the language has never fallen completely out of use, with a minority having some knowledge of it as a heritage language, and it is still an important part of the island's culture and cultural heritage.

Manx is often cited as a good example of language revitalization efforts; in 2015, around 1,800 people had varying levels of second-language conversational ability. Since the late 20th century, Manx has become more visible on the island, with increased signage, radio broadcasts and a Manx-medium primary school. The revival of Manx has been made easier because the language was well recorded, e.g. the Bible and the Book of Common Prayer had been translated into Manx, and audio recordings had been made of native speakers. (wikipedia)

• • •

This was kind of echo of yesterday's puzzle. Yesterday, I went from "what the hell is this weak theme?" to "Oh, ha ha, good one." Today, I went from "what the hell is this inscrutable theme?" to "Oh, ha ha, good one." This is to say that the revealer did its job both days. "Huh?" to "Oh!"—that is the trajectory you want to follow from the beginning of a puzzle to the moment you hit the revealer. Today's theme is definitely trickier than yesterday's—yesterday, the only mystery was what was linking all the answers, while today there was real mystery as to how in the world the answers fit the clues at all. But overall yesterday's puzzle felt cleaner. Leaner. And the revealer was slightly funnier (or loopier). Also, there's one major problem with the execution of this theme, to my eyes, which is that in two of the theme answers (COVER CHARGE, CLEAN-CUT), there are actually two (2) "C"s. So the answer is, in fact, under the "C" ... but only the first one. When your answer has two of them, the elegance of the whole design suffers. The extra "C"s don't cause any real confusion at the solving level, but they diminish the force of the revealer. "UNDER THE SEA ... get it? under the "C" ... no not that "C," the other one. Just ignore that one." Still, the revealer did give me a little pop of "aha," instead of a sad slap of "oh" or "ugh" or "oof," so on the whole I'd still put this one in the Thumbs-up column. The ideal version of this theme would have no "C"s but the thematically relevant "C"s, but ... this is fine.

The theme answers were about the only thing in the grid causing any difficulty today, at least for me. I have almost no ink on my printed-out grid, which means that there was both very little in the way of toughness and (more sadly) very little in the way of real interest. I had HULU before ROKU (42A: Video streaming giant) and GO ON before GUSH (56A: Rave (about)), but that's it for missteps or even serious hesitations. I wanted (C)LOSING TIME to be (C)LOSING GROUND for more than a few seconds, but of course it wouldn't fit. Otherwise, the puzzle was pretty straightforward and the fill a little on the dull side. Liked seeing BRAD PITT; hated seeing FOIE GRAS, as always (for animal cruelty reasons) (39D: Duck delicacy). I was contemplating seeing Tarantino's Once Upon a Time ... in Hollywood at Tarantino's own New Beverly Cinema when I'm out in Southern California next week—BRAD PITT is great in that—but I decided I'd use my one New Beverly visit on a matinee screening of The Godfather, Part II instead). I.B. Technicolor 35mm. I've never seen it on the big screen, with an audience. Can't wait. But back to the puzzle. I kinda wish BROADCASTER (17A: Television pro) had been thematic somehow—would've made the theme symmetrical. Really feels like it's occupying a thematic position, but it isn't, oh well. I also wish they hadn't duped "UP," especially considering one of the "UP's appears in a theme (i.e. marquee) answer (OPENS UP, (C)RAMPS UP). 


What else?:

• 19A: "... ___ lack thereof" ("OR A") — I don't usually use an indefinite article when I say this. That is, "or lack thereof" feels like the right phrase. No "a." Obviously, you can say it that way. But I don't.
• 20A: Passionately discuss minutiae, with "out" (NERD) — I think I wanted HASH here but the crosses wouldn't allow it. This is a decent / original clue for NERD.
• 6A: Man, on the Isle of Man (BLOKE) — since the (historical) language of the Isle of Man is Manx (see "Word of the Day," above), I really thought this was going to be some Isle-of-Man-specific thing, maybe a slang term derived from Manx, but it's just ... a general British word for "man."
• 1D: Vaccine, informally (JAB) — this also feels British. Are we calling it the JAB now, too?
• 3D: What it would be a mistake to write twice? (BOO) — can't decide if this is great or awful. If you write BOO twice, it *is* literally a (word meaning) mistake: BOO-BOO. I can't argue with that.

Gotta go get the coffee started and then get to the gym, where I think it probably is a LEG DAY (48D: Gym session devoted to squats, dead lifts, etc.). Thanks for reminding me, puzzle. See you all tomorrow.

Signed, Rex Parker, King of CrossWorld

[Follow Rex Parker on Twitter and Facebook]

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Hunger hyperbole / FRI 3-8-24 / World leader associated with the justicialism movement / Manette woman in A Tale of Two Cities / Needle on a thread? / Balanced, as some molecules / Flotsam once in Boston Harbor / Bread with charred brown spots / Hot rods popular in the '60s / "Herb" ... or a lead-in to herb

Constructor: Jackson Matz

Relative difficulty: Easy Medium (started Medium, then really sped up)

THEME: none 

Word of the Day: justicialism (42D: World leader associated with the justicialism movement = PERÓN) —

Peronism, also known as justicialism, is a labour and left-leaning Argentine political movement based on the ideas and legacy of Argentine ruler Juan Perón (1895–1974). It has been an influential movement in 20th- and 21st-century Argentine politics. Since 1946, Peronists have won 10 out of the 14 presidential elections in which they have been allowed to run. // Ideologically populist, Peronism is widely considered to be a variant of left-wing populism, although some have described it as a Latin American form of fascism instead. Others have criticized these descriptions as too one-dimensional, as Peronism also includes many variants, including Kirchnerism and revolutionary Peronism on the left, and Federal Peronism and Orthodox Peronism on the right. Peronism is described as socialist by some political scientists, while other scholars evaluate Peronism as a paternalistic conservative ideology, with a mixture of militant labourism and traditional conservatism. However, proponents of Peronism see it as socially progressive. The main Peronist party is the Justicialist Party, whose policies have significantly varied over time and across government administrations, but have generally been described as "a vague blend of nationalism and labourism", or populism. [...] The pillars of the Peronist ideal, known as the "three flags", are social justice, economic independence, and political sovereignty. Peronism can be described as a third position ideology as it rejects both capitalism and communism. Peronism espouses corporatism and thus aims to mediate tensions between the classes of society, with the state responsible for negotiating compromise in conflicts between managers and workers.

• • •

Loved this one, except for SELF-DRIVING CARS (31A: Things going beyond your control?), which are a menace and yet another step toward humankind's complete acquiescence to, let's see, the automotive industry, big tech, A.I.—all the things entities that have made life on this planet such a glorious, non-soul-crushing experience. The Great Utopian Vision of "Convenience!" (dubious) and "Safety!" (elusive) all so we can't have basic, nice things like functional public transit (because that would be Communist and anyway I hear the subways are full of crime and we need to send in the military—all my white neighbors who don't actually live in the city are saying so!). OK, anyway, loved this puzzle, and actually, as an answer, as a term that exists and is fairly modern, SELF-DRIVING CARS is not bad. Just ... when I see the term, my brain makes a WHOOPEE CUSHION noise (13D: Butt of a joke?).

Lots of whoosh-whoosh today ... or ... more like two big Whooshes, first down the west coast, and later down the east coast, with a connecting whoosh in those damned SELF-DRIVING CARS. Love the feeling of getting a grid-spanning entry off the first few letters, and that happened ... well, every time I encountered such an entry today. "CARE TO ELABORATE?" off the CAR-, WHOOPEE CUSHION off the WHOO- (though I spelled it WHOOPIE CUSHION at first, which still looks more right to me, even though my blogging software is underlining it in "red" like "nope, buddy, it's wrong"). With the long answers in the east, I actually worked out their middles first using the crosses, everything from DEB down to HEP, but didn't even bother looking at the clues on the long answers at that point (I don't like to look until I think I've got enough crosses to give me a good chance of getting it). Oh, actually, I must've looked at 11D: Jewelry gift for a 25th anniversary because I remember writing BRACELET in and then figuring I'd just head north and fill in the NE corner to figure out what metal was involved. Anyway, I held back on the whoosh feeling until I went up and worked out that NE corner, and then wheeeeee ... down I went via "I COULD EAT A HORSE" (fun ... grim, if you think about the answer too much, but fun if you don't!). The momentum from that blasted me right through the SE corner, and that was that. Done at NAAN, wishing I could get on the ride and do it again.

The difficulty today was all in the short stuff. That LESS LAND LIFT trio made for a thorny little passage from North to West (21A: What some consume on a diet / 21D: Secure / 24D: Steal). Speaking of "trios" ... that is the word you want when speaking of the Jonas Brothers: trio. They're a trio. They're a trio far more than they are a THREESOME (15A: The Jonas Brothers, e.g.). I know, technically, trio means THREESOME, but I was disappointed that the puzzle passed up the spicier clue there, both because ... spice, who doesn't like spice!? ... and because the clue they went with is dull and inapt. I was happy today to remember things I didn't think I was going to remember. Like that a STEM is a small part of a watch (the part on the side that you pull out and twist when you want to change the time or date or whatever), and that MONACO was a very small place, and that BARN could go before "door" or "dance" (I'm usually so bad at the "word that can go before/after"-type clues, so it's stunning to me that I got one this easily, especially one so RURAL). I had a nice experience with BALLER, in that I thought "huh, B-BALLER doesn't fit ... oh wait, I think it's just ... is it? ... yes, BALLER!" Stumbling into correct answers! What a feeling!

[they're laughing at the Jonas Brothers clue]

Bullets:

• 16A: Needle on a thread? (TROLL) — a very hard "?" clue. A TROLL is a person who tries to "needle" people in an internet thread (or, say, a comments section). Nothing makes me happier than deleting TROLLs. Every day. Pew pew! Buh-bye! Trying to stir up shit? Don't know the difference between disagreement and being a dick? See ya. Go cry "freedom of speech" to your mama, sad boy.
• 26A: Practice squad? Abbr. (DRS.) — another hard "?" clue. Doctors often work together in orgs. called "practices," so there you go. At least I hope that's the logic. 
• 36A: Student enrolled in courses like Contracts and Civil Procedures (ONE L) — slang for a first-year law student. Ancient Crosswordese. Stunned to see that from 1997 to 1999 (when crosswordese would've been much more rampant), ONE L made just one appearance a year. It's made two already this year (though in the last case, it was the actual theme of the puzzle, so no penalties for crosswordese were incurred). 
• 28D: "That's what I just said!" ("JINX!") — these do not feel equivalent. You don't say "JINX!" when someone repeats what you said (which is what "just said" implies). You shout it when you say something at the same time that someone else says it. I feel like this exclamation, in some regional variants, also involves various rituals, like punching the other person in the arm, or possibly adding "you owe me a Coke!" Where am I getting that last bit from? Did we just make that up as kids? OMG there's a whole reddit thread about this, of course there's a whole reddit thread about this... The following is from user "Kelpie-Cat"

According to the OED, the first documented use of jinxing as a children's game is in 1973. An article called "The Jinx Game: A Ritualized Expression of Separation-Individuation" by Jerome D. Oremland was published that year in The Psychoanalytic Study of the Child. Oremland describes the jinx game as "a sophisticated, stereotyped ritual". The version of the game he analyzes uses only the cry of "Jinx!" without any reference to soda or another reward. That the game may be much older is suggested by its equivalents in other linguistic environments: "Though the Game is played in a remarkably identical manner in various geographical areas, the word used to induce the spell varies widely, e.g., Israeli children shout, Ain, the Arabic word for ghost or evil eye". There is also a French variant called Chips, although it's unclear whether this is derivative of the English "jinx".

• 29D: Good name for a last-minute planner? (EVE) — yet another "?" clue that I had no clue about. I'm not sure this is a good name for a last-minute planner. RUSH might be a better name for such a person (though why anyone would name a human being RUSH, for reasons other than spite or malice, is beyond me).
• 34D: Pre-algebra class calculations (SLOPES) — I got this easy enough but didn't really get the "class" part. Why isn't this just [Pre-algebra calculations]? "Pre-algebra" is the class that you would be in when making such calculations, so "class" seems redundant.
• 25A: A mover ... but not a shaker, one hopes (VAN) — does one hope that, though? Seems like some people enjoy a shaking van. Or so I read.

Signed, Rex Parker, King of CrossWorld

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