Mythological instruments of vengeance / WED 5-21-25 / Something feigned by Ferris Bueller to get out of school / Word with chocolate or computer / Biblical birthright barterer / Ectoplasmic residue

Constructor: Ilana Levene and Scott Hogan

Relative difficulty: Easy

THEME: direct address — familiar two-word phrases are clued as if the second word is a familiar term of address: 

Theme answers:

• "CHEESE, DOG!" (17A: "Smile for the photo, dude!")
• "DELIVERY, MAN!" (24A: "Work on your enunciation, bro!")
• "TWISTED, SISTER!" (33A: "That is messed up, girl!")
• "BLOCK, BUSTER!" (49A: "Protect the quarterback, buddy!")
• "WILD, HONEY!" (57A: "That's unbelievable, love!")

Word of the Day: Tin lizzie (6D: Tin lizzie = MODEL T) —

The Ford Model T is an automobile that was produced by the Ford Motor Company from October 1, 1908, to May 26, 1927. It is generally regarded as the first mass-affordable automobile, which made car travel available to middle-class Americans. The relatively low price was partly the result of Ford's efficient fabrication, including assembly line production instead of individual handcrafting. The savings from mass production allowed the price to decline from $780 in 1910 (equivalent to $26,322 in 2024) to $290 in 1924 ($5,321 in 2024 dollars). It was mainly designed by three engineers, Joseph A. Galamb (the main engineer), Eugene Farkas, and Childe Harold Wills. The Model T was colloquially known as the "Tin Lizzie".

The Ford Model T was named the most influential car of the 20th century in the 1999 Car of the Century competition, ahead of the BMC Mini, Citroën DS, and Volkswagen Beetle. Ford's Model T was successful not only because it provided inexpensive transportation on a massive scale, but also because the car signified innovation for the rising middle class and became a powerful symbol of the United States' age of modernization. With over 15 million sold, it was the most sold car in history before being surpassed by the Volkswagen Beetle in 1972. (wikipedia)

A 1922 Car Race 

In the early 1900s, car dealers would try to create publicity for their new automobiles by hosting car races. In 1922 a championship race was held in Pikes Peak, Colorado. Entered as one of the contestants was Noel Bullock and his Model T, named "Old Liz."

Since Old Liz looked the worse for wear, as it was unpainted and lacked a hood, many spectators compared Old Liz to a tin can. By the start of the race, the car had the new nickname of "Tin Lizzie."

But to everyone's surprise, Tin Lizzie won the race. Having beaten even the most expensive other cars available at the time, Tin Lizzie proved both the durability and speed of the Model T.

Tin Lizzie's surprise win was reported in newspapers across the country, leading to the use of the nickname "Tin Lizzie" for all Model T cars. The car also had a couple of other nicknames—"Leaping Lena" and "flivver"—but it was the Tin Lizzie moniker that stuck. (thoughtco.com) 

• • •

This one got better as it rolled along. You really have to mentally add a bunch of words to make those first two themers work. You're asking someone (in this case, "dog") to say CHEESE. Leaving the actual instruction part out of the expression creates confusion, especially since it's the first themer anyone's likely to encounter. Even if I were being super caszh (that's casual for "casual") with my, ahem, dogs, I would probably still say the "Say" part of "SAY CHEESE." The next themer ("DELIVERY, MAN") requires you to infer a lot of words: specifically, the words "You need to work on your." These opening theme clues are doing a lot of work to make the theme phrases seem plausible. But for the next three, they all sound quite natural. Sounds totally normal to admit, for instance, the "that is" part and just say "TWISTED, SISTER" or "WILD, HONEY." And the direct command ("BLOCK, BUSTER!") is probably the most natural-sounding of the bunch. No mental supplying of words necessary. A very self-contained, clear expression. So, decent concept with halfway decent execution. Always better when the theme gets sharper / tighter / clearer as it goes on. Much better than the opposite, that's for sure.

The puzzle overall was super-easy, with an admirably clean grid. That cleanness is related to the easiness, I think. There's just not a lot of pop culture trivia or proper nouns generally, or archaic, odd, crosswords-only type words or expressions. I mean, there's ANAIS Nin and ANG Lee and EMMA Thompson / Stone, but those people are constants. There's FERMI and ESAU but you really are not being tasked much at all with retrieving names today. The straightforwardness of it all does put the grid in danger a little bit of being boring, but vivid words like SPLURGES and STOLID provide some distinction and character, and occasionally the clues come along and help out as well. The clue on SICKNESS is particularly well-handled, as it turns a bummer of a thing into a non-existent thing *and* evokes an iconic movie (well, iconic if you were an '80s teen (guilty) (34D: Something feigned by Ferris Bueller to get out of school). Also iconic to '80s teens: TWISTED SISTER:

The puzzle was a little too easy, I think. I had a stupid bad opening, playing NIH and WHA? (!?!?!) instead of CDC and "HUH?," but after that, there wasn't much slowing or pausing. Few occasions for reflection or rumination. I wasn't entirely sure about the musical tempo indication, "sostenuto" (54A: what "sostenuto" means in music). Seemed like it should've meant "sustained," and I guess it does, but somehow my brain could not quickly get from there to the simple English word LONGER. STOLID gave me a few seconds pause because I'm never quite sure I know the definition of STOLID (46D: Like a good poker face). It's like LIMPID that way, for me—seems like it should mean something other than what it does. STOLID looks like it wants to mean "SOLID" (it's just one letter shy off, after all), and it also seems like it couldn't possibly mean "emotionless" or "impassive" because STOIC already exists and why would there be two words that close in meaning *and* spelling, that's just confusing. LIMPID & STOLID should team up. Seems like together, they have pretty good range. One of them clear, open, graceful; the other—all business. A real numbers guy. Seemingly unfazed by the day-to-day hassles of the job. LIMPID & STOLID sounds like a songwriting team, or an accounting firm. "LIMPID & STOLID, L.L.C." I'd trust them.


Bullets:

• 21A: Mythological instruments of vengeance (FURIES) — "instruments" is gonna trip up a lot of people here. It tripped me up, and I teach about the FURIES on a regular basis. I just assumed the "instruments" were going to be, like, tools, or implements of some sort. Weapons, perhaps. Not anthropomorphic hell creatures. 
• 7D: Language in which "Kia ora" means "Hello" (MAORI) — the latest episode of Conan O'Brien Must Go has him going to New Zealand, where many a "Kia ora" is heard. I watched the ep with my wife (who grew up on the South Island) and she assumed it was going to make her cringe, seeing her native country caricatured and condescended to. But it's Conan, so of course it's totally absurd and almost completely formless, as he careens around the country visiting some of his podcast fans, getting into shenanigans, and not even bothering to try to give you anything like a conventional travelogue overview. There's a family living off-grid, in a repurposed shipping container, on the western side of the South Island ("there's nothing over there but sand flies"—my wife). Conan officiates a bungee-jump wedding. My favorite part was probably when Conan got pushed around by a KEA (they are mountain parrots that seem adorable, but they have no fear and will straight-up steal your lunch money—or your entire lunch). Despite not reminding me much of the NZ I know at all, the episode made me want to go back again, immediately, like tomorrow. Best place on earth.

• 12D: Try again (REHEAR) — oh, try. Like a case. OK. I have no love for REHEAR. RETRY, yes, REHEAR, ugh. But in an otherwise clean grid, I guess it's tolerable. 

Signed, Rex Parker, King of CrossWorld

[Follow Rex Parker on BlueSky and Facebook]