TUESDAY, Feb. 10, 2009 - J. Underwood (Operatic movement circa 1900 / Leandro's partner in a Mancinelli opera / Outlander in Hawaii)

Relative difficulty: Medium-Challenging

THEME: National Blank - 12 different Across answers are clued as National adjective + blank, e.g. 1A: Turkish _____, 5A: Dutch _____, etc.

Word of the Day: VERISMO - An artistic movement of the late 19th century, originating in Italy and influential especially in grand opera, marked by the use of rural characters and common, everyday themes often treated in a melodramatic manner. (answers.com)

First things first - I humbly beg whoever flagged this blog as "objectionable" to unflag it. And please, in the future, if you are genuinely offended by anything I post, let me know (email is right there, on the right), as I have no desire to offend people. This is a crossword blog that is currently being treated like a porn blog, and while my traffic might go through the roof because, you know, people like porn, I just want to make the blog as easily accessible to crossword solvers as possible. There are some solvers who are not going to understand this warning (trust me) and are not going to want to click through. Hell, I don't know that I'd click through such a warning - who knows what's waiting for you on the other side? I just want the "Objectionable Content" warning gone as soon as possible, and anyone who can help me achieve this will have my undying gratitude (that's worth something, right?). If I can't get the Flag removed in the very near future, you can expect a change of address. [I've been "unlisted" by Blogger, which means I've virtually disappeared from Google search results and even if you search [rex parker], though my site is listed first, it's titled "Objectionable Content Warning" ... grrr. I see a move to WordPress in my future.]

[UPDATE - problem seems to be fixed. No idea where credit is due yet, but I'll distribute said credit tomorrow. Sigh. Thanks to everyone who offered support of any kind]

This puzzle was hard for a Tuesday. Oh, my time...

Solving time: 5:10 (on paper)

OK, so there is not theme in the grid. That is to say, the only way you can see the theme is by looking at the clues. You could never identify the theme simply by looking at the grid. So there was not the usual assistance you might get on a Tuesday from identifying the theme. This explains some of the difficulty. Then there's the "Bush" clue in the NW, which bugged me no end, first because ... "Bush," really? And second, you or I or anyone could call up many pictures of people who today, right now, sport some version of the AFRO (14A: Bush not seen much nowadays). The other speed bumps for me today were as follows:

• Wrote in BEATS where ROUTS was supposed to go (6D: Licks soundly)
• Wrote in EROO where AROO was supposed to go (27A: Buck's tail?) - I make this mistake with AROO every time
• Blanked on TEL (47A: Hill, in Haifa) - turns out, I was looking for LOD at first. Interestingly, LOD is just 15km southeast of TEL Aviv
• Could not bring myself to write in VILIFIER (40D: Slanderer)
• Only the dimmest memories of every having seen NINON (63A: Sturdy chiffon) - had NYLON for a few seconds
• Thought 52D: Hindu wise one (swami) ended in an A and honestly considered (for a split second) LLAMA...
• IANA? IA-NO... (61A: Collector's suffix) - that one hurts
• VERISMO? VERIS-NO... (51A: Operatic movement circa 1900) - never ever ever etc. heard of it

I don't know what would have happened if some other obscurish stuff hadn't been easy for me, e.g. "THE CROW" (9D: Brandon Lee's last movie). Oh, and I wrote in ALDO very tentatively, having never been asked to think about Gucci's first name before (29D: Fashion designer Gucci). Even my buddy ERNE seemed harder than usual today (7D: White-tailed eagle). I don't have very strong feelings about the puzzle - I just strongly feel that it is tougher than your avg. Tuesday. But then Tuesday is so loopy that I don't even know what "Avg. Tuesday" means, frankly. Does everyone know HAOLE (23D: Outlander in Hawaii)? It's not freakishly odd, but it's not an everyday word, either (unless you live in Hawaii).

Theme answers:

• 1A: Turkish _____ (bath) - wanted DELIGHT (too many Narnia books)
• 5A: Dutch _____ (treat) - is this a national slur? Like ... the Dutch are cheap, so they won't pay for your dinner?
• 20A: Russian _____ (roulette) - Reminds me of "Deer Hunter"
• 22A: Swiss _____ (cheese) - wanted MISS (as in COCOA - 34D: Apres-ski drink)
• 34A: Australian _____ (crawl) - wanted OUTBACK
• 35A: American _____ (elm) - wanted GIGOLO
• 41A: Italian _____ (ice)
• 42A: Canadian _____ (bacon)
• 55A: Danish _____ (pastry)
• 57A: Portuguese _____ (man of war) - wife and I both wanted the Irish spelling, MAN O'WAR
• 66A: French _____ (toast) - wanted BREAD, which is close
• 67A: Spanish _____ (rice) - wanted MAIN ... that's something, right?

Bullets:

• 19A: Superheroes battling the evil Magneto (X-Men) - starting "Watchmen" today with my Comics class. It's indescribably good. What would the world look like, realistically, if masked heroes existed? Well, for one, Nixon would apparently still be president in 1986...
• 25A: Military pooh-bahs (brass) - "pooh-bah" is one of those great words that survives almost exclusively in captivity (i.e. crossword clues). It's a word I learned from "The Flintstones," I think.
• 26A: Preceders of xis (nus) - "Preceders!" Another klassic kluing word.
• 28A: Cap with a pompom (tam) - clue looks at first and second and many other glances like [Cap with a popcorn]
• 59A: Appetite stimulant (aroma) - thought this would be a drug. Some AROMAs do Not stimulate my appetite at all.
• 65A: Ivan or Feodor (tsar) - Ivan, sure; Feodor? He's new to me.
• 8D: Takeoff and landing overseers: Abbr. (ATC) - as in Air Traffic Control, not an abbr. I can recall ever seeing in the grid.
• 11D: Locale for a pioneer family (homestead) - "Locale" - again with the klassic kluing words. Did you know HOMESTEAD anagrams to SOME DEATH? and DO THE SAME? It's true.
• 21D: Part of the Australian coat of arms (emu) - can't decided if this is sad or comical
• 33D: Convertible (sleep sofa) - I know I've made this comment before, but I always hear it as SLEEPER SOFA ...
• 43D: Tiny marcher (army ant) - this one was a prayer off the initial "AR..." Elton John did not sing about a tiny marcher, that I know of:

• 48D: Leandro's partner in a Mancinelli opera (Ero) - I knew this, but come on. That's kind of obscure, right? I mean, for a Tuesday? Ugh, the phrase "for a Tuesday" no longer has any meaning to me!

Signed, Rex Parker, King of CrossWorld

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FRIDAY, Jul. 4, 2008 - John Underwood (IT IS "RESISTLESS IN BATTLE," WROTE SOPHOCLES)

Relative difficulty: Easy

THEME: JOHN PHILIP SOUSA (28A: Subject of this puzzle)

Happy 4th of July, Americans. Assuming there are no thunderstorms, we are going to spend the day in patriotic style: poolside bbq followed by minor league baseball game, complete with post-game fireworks. Added bonus: first 7000 fans get Groucho glasses, because nothing says "4th of July" like 7000 people at a minor league baseball game trying to break the record for "Most People Wearing Groucho Glasses at In One Place at One Time." My sister's family is here for the holiday, and we spent all yesterday hanging out with them. My nephews are 3 (Griffin) and 6 (Miles) and completely hilarious. Sahra and Miles together are like some olde tyme comedy team, only with no set jokes and no timing and a tendency to crack themselves up into incoherence. Highlights of yesterday's visit included eating a pancake breakfast prepared by my lovely wife; watching my sister and brother-in-law do the U.S.A. Today crossword puzzle while I offered color commentary (which mainly involved my proclaiming that every other answer sucked); walking in the woods; watching the kids swim in the near-lethally chlorinated hotel swimming pool, which featured an insane and unnecessarily graphic sign nearby telling you what you could and Could Not do in the pool; eating a delicious dinner at a downtown restaurant while playing increasingly surreal games of Hangman with the kids (Miles was partial to words like "eeeeeeeee" and "dite pepse" (he's obsessed with soda ... obsessed, I tell you - perhaps because, unlike many other kids, he is not allowed to drink it with impunity). We started doing Hangman using complete sentences. I gave the kids "MILES AND SAHRA SMELL LIKE CHEESE." They loved it, and Sahra countered with "MILES AND REX SMELL LIKE ALCHAL" (we destroyed evidence of this one, as it seemed the kind of note that could be used against me in a court of law). Highlight of the night was hearing about a big-horned sheep stuffed animal that was the "mascot" of my sister's family's recent trip around Colorado. The sheep was named (by Miles) "The Big Sh'Clark" (I'm laughing just typing it), and somehow the whole latter part of last night was overwhelmed by "The Big Sh'Clark": calling everything "Big Sh'Clark," turning "Sh'Clark" into a verb, and finally creating a recipe for a dessert called "The Big Sh'Clark" which contains (in case you are interested) chocolate ice cream, vanilla ice cream, whipped cream, M&Ms, a single Skittle (!?), halves of Reese's Pieces (?), and root beer .... ok, as if on cue, this very second (6:30am) my daughter walked into the room holding up a yellow piece of paper for me to see. Me: "What's that, honey?" Sahra: "The Big Sh'Clark" Me: [can't stop laughing]. Here are photos from dinner.

And ... puzzle! Super easy - must be some kind of holiday exception going on here, because I can't believe this was intended as a Friday puzzle. It took me only a few seconds longer than Tuesday's puzzle did, and the whole thing felt very, very Thursday. Almost quintessentially Thursday. No matter - it's an enjoyable little puzzle with the nice patriotic bonus of a twice-repeated "U.S.A." (the start, middle, and end of a patriotic cheer).

Theme answers:

• 20A: 1916 work by 28-Across ("America First") - scary title; sounds like an anti-immigrant group
• 48A: Title subject of a 28-Across work (Stars and Stripes)
• 55A: Sobriquet for 28-Across (The March King) - it's the 4th of July and you go with ... "sobriquet?" Bastille Day is only 10 days away; you could have waited.

Not a lot of tough stuff today. Sister and family are going to show up here any minute and make writing impossible, so:

Kwik list:

• 1A: Designer known for his "American look" (Ellis) - as in Perry. I think the first cologne I ever bought was Perry Ellis. I now cannot stand the smell of cologne or perfume, in general. Hurts my nose, and thus my head, and thus my soul. Maybe the tiniest whiff is OK. Most people who wear it bathe in it.
• 16A: "Three Places in New England" composer (Ives) - I like him. I'm going to put him on right ... now ("Trio for Violin, Cello, and Piano")
• 35A: When doubled, a book by Gauguin (Noa) - whoa ... that was a shocker. I had NON, at first, as in "NON, NON, zat is not how you paint ze naked ladees."
• 54A: N.R.C predecessor (A.E.C.) - needed all the crosses, largely because I confused the N.R.C. with the A.N.C.
• 61A: Items for Rambos (uzis) - so there are multiple Rambos now?
• 64A: Ames Research Center org. (NASA) - I did not know this. Is this in Iowa? Nope. CA.
• 67A: Anita who sang "Is You Is or Is You Ain't My Baby" (O'Day) - lotsa people have sung this. I like Dinah Washington's version. But this one's not bad either:
  

• 68A: Where Hercules slew the lion (Nemea) - that's why it's called the Nemean Lion.
• 3D: It is "resistless in battle," wrote Sophocles (Love) - interesting answer
• 4D: Spring river breakup (ice run) - one of those seasonal, regional things that I never knew about growing up in CA.
• 6D: Barbara Kingsolver's "_____ America" ("Otra") - I had "VIVA!"
• 11D: "Die Meistersinger" heroine (Eva) - no idea; this answer and NOA and HARLAN (30D: Supreme Court justice Stone) were the only unknowns to me today.
• 32D: Beamed intensely (lased) - yes, that is intense. I wanted RAYED. Well, I didn't "want" it, but I thought it was the answer.
• 38D: Fraternal patriotic org. (SAR) - I somehow neglected the "fraternal" part of this clue and so had DAR for a while. You almost Never see the SAR.
• 46D: Opposite of legato: Abbr. (stac.) - hmmm. Kind of icky. Maybe not ICKIER (51D: More gross) than TSKS (55D: Clucking sounds), but icky nonetheless.
• 58D: "Garfield" waitress (Irma) - it slightly sickens me that that the crossword can go this deep into "Garfield" for an answer.
• 41D: Poetica opening (ars) - not sure I like ARS and "opening" so close to each other.
• 50D: Put back on display, in a way (rehang) - OK, now that's icky.
• 21D: Sammy the lyricist (Cahn) - he's good, but I prefer Sammy the Seal

Signed, Rex Parker, King of CrossWorld

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TUESDAY, Nov. 6, 2007 - John Underwood

Relative difficulty: Easy

Theme: "Five" - six (?) theme answers contain the word "FIVE," including two intersecting sets of "FIVE" (one in the NW, the other in the SE)

This felt very Monday-ish. I finished in a very Monday-ish sub-5 minutes. I might have been faster, but my brain wouldn't allow itself to become convinced that the only real thematic element here was "FIVE," and that "FIVE" would be repeating itself all over the grid, and that this info would prove a huge advantage in uncovering other theme answers. Had intersecting FIVE's in the NW and thought ... well, not much, but certainly not that Every Theme Answer Would Contain a Five. I wouldn't say the puzzle was very ARTFUL (54A: Like Dickens's Dodger), but I learned a few things.


Theme answers:

• 17A: Eisenhower was one (five-star general)
• 3D: Nickel (five cents)
• 23A: 2:30, aboard ship (five bells) - never ever heard of this; cool expression
• 49A: Rests for a bit (takes five)
• 32D: Request for a congratulatory slap ("gimme five!")
• 57A: Shortly after quitting time, for many (quarter past five) - don't like this at all. It's a totally arbitrary time. :(

To this puzzle's credit, it does cover a lot of ground, with interesting sub-thematic groupings. You've got...

Asia!

• 30A: Ho Chi Minh's capital (Hanoi)
• 46A: Chiang Kai-shek's capital (Taipei)

Boxing!

• 4D: Slugging it out (toe to toe)
• 20A: Move unsteadily (teeter)
• 39D: Be worth (count for) - OK that one's a stretch, but a ref does COUNT FOR 10 counts when a boxer has been knocked down. This answer slowed me down more than any other, because I had the CO- and wrote in "COST ..." :(

Baking!

• 13D: Ceramists' baking chambers (kilns)
• 64A: Pizzeria fixture (oven)

Finery!

• 6D: Feathery wrap (boa)
• 49D: Brimless cap (toque)

Comic strips!

• 2D: Garfield's foil (Odie)
• 51D: "The Family Circus" cartoonist Bill (Keane)

Jews!

• 43D: "My Name is Asher _____" ("Lev")
• 63A: Shul V.I.P. (rabbi) - experience tells me this clue will get a lot of Google searches. The simple [Shul's shepherd] sent hundreds and hundreds of people to my site. As did [Rabbi's instrument] => SHOFAR. Rabbinical matters appear to be a blind spot for many solvers (not just me).

Drama!

• 53A: "Waiting for Lefty" playwright (Odets)
• 33D: Pierce player (Alda)
• 21A: Delon of "Purple Noon" (Alain) - so sexy; go rent "Le Samouraï" right now - this guy is the ultimate noir actor.
  
• 67A: Try for a role (read)

That's pretty much it. I liked A FIRST (29A: Something new), but just because of the inclusion of the indefinite article, which is so unusual in puzzles. Never saw OMSK (10A: Trans-Siberian Railroad stop) or MUNI (16A: City bond, for short) in the NE because I got the whole section from Downs alone. I like clue at 9D: Fruity quencher (ade), if not the answer.

I must go get coffee and Munchkins with my dog now, and then work like crazy til noon, when I have to go pick up my wife from a rather unpleasant medical procedure (she is Totally Fine, it's just a semi-routine examination that many of you have likely had). It does not pass the breakfast test.

Signed, Rex Parker, King of CrossWorld

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TUESDAY, Jun. 19, 2007 - John Underwood

Relative difficulty: Medium-Hard

THEME: Campus Compass Points - four theme answers are homes of colleges, with NORTH, WEST, SOUTH, and EAST in their names, respectively; further, every answer is a city followed by a two-letter state code

Didn't see the compass point aspect of this puzzle until about two minutes ago. I found the whole puzzle a bit befuddling - doable, but full of all sorts of weirdness. I'm including the theme in the "weirdness," as there are three different features that link them all, though technically only one of those features is the theme, I guess. We have the compass points, plus the college/university angle, plus the state code angle. Kind of a mess, conceptually, though I like the way the city+state code looks in the grid.

Theme answers:

• 20A: Home of Smith College (Northampton, MA)
• 29A: Home of the U.S. Military Academy (West Point, NY)
• 44A: Home of Notre Dame (South Bend, IN)
• 52A: Home of Michigan State (East Lansing, MI)

Having spent 8 years of my life at a major university in the midwest, I got the last two of these answers immediately. For some reason WEST POINT, NY took a while to come together, and NORTHAMPTON, MA was not familiar to me (though inferrable with a few crosses).

But on top of the theme weirdness, there are plenty of INSANE (47D: Ready for the rubber room) non-theme answers. Let's start with:

26A: 100 square meters (are)

I was dead certain this was wrong. ARE??? Talk about dressing a toad up in a tux and teaching it to dance ... WTF? ARE is a linking verb. The fact that it also has this esoteric meaning in some farming quarters does not mean I should be subjected to said meaning. When I finished the puzzle, I actually Googled ALONSO (26D: "The Tempest" king) to make sure I'd remembered my high school Shakespeare accurately, and thus that the "A" cross on ARE was correct. It was. ARE! Man oh man.

41A: Unicorn in a 1998 movie (Nico)

Again, huh? It's Tuesday and you're giving me unicorn movies Nobody Has Heard Of!? I for one would like to see NICO killed and burned to ashes, so that we can return him to the URN from which he apparently escaped. NICO's one virtue is that it rhymes with BIKO (9D: Steven _____, real-life subject of the 1987 film "Cry Freedom")

25D: Colorist's vessel (dye pot)

This sounds medieval. Do modern colorists really call their "vessels" DYE POTs? It's a super-ugly phrase.

11D: Former lovers, e.g. (ex-partners)

Not fond of this one, mainly because the answer is not a very in-the-language phrase. [Conan O'Brien and Andy Richter, e.g.] might have made this answer work. For me.

6D: Mingo player on "Daniel Boone" (Ed Ames)

Where do I begin. After I stopped laughing at the very word "Mingo," I realized I would never get this without crosses. I've seen ED AMES in the puzzle before, which is the only reason I was able to fill his name in. "Daniel Boone!?!" Oh sure, I used to watch that when I was negative 10 years old.

34D: Nova _____ (Scotian)

SCOTIAN? I can't recall seeing a partial used this way, where the missing part is modified to a less-used, less common part of speech. Kind of icky. Gettable, but :(

46D: Naysayer (denier)

The clue - you'd use that word. The answer - no, not so much.

Took me forever to get EARED (23A: Flop or lop follower) and I balked at the cluing on REGALE (5D: Wine and dine). I always think of REGALE in the context of story-telling, as in "so and so REGALEd us with stories of his time on the high seas" or whatever.

On the brighter side, there is a handful of hot fill in this grid. I especially like the bad movies, including AEON FLUX (61A: With 64-Across, 2005 Charlize Theron title role) - never saw it, but I own the comic book tie-in that came out around the same time ... for some reason - and "Blame it ON RIO" (49A: "Blame it _____" (Michael Caine film)), which I watched many times on HBO in the early-mid 80s. It had breasts in it. I was 14. Now you know.

Lastly, I commend the near juxtaposition of PLANETARIA (59A: Sites for stargazers) and SPHERE (66A: Ball).

Good night / morning.

Signed, Rex Parker, King of CrossWorld

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MONDAY, May 28, 2007 - John Underwood

Relative difficulty: Easy

THEME: TWENTY QUESTIONS (55A: Game suggested by the first words of 17-, 25- and 42-Across)

Despite the fact that I have summer "off" (as in, no teaching duties) - or, rather, because I have summer "off" - I have to dedicate significantly more of my time to writing beginning Tuesday morning, and so this blog, while it will continue, will be somewhat shorter on a daily basis than it has been historically. More concise and efficient, I hope. Less long-winded and self-indulgent. Streamlined. Downsized. So that I can survive in the New Economic blah blah blah. The bottom line is that I have to concentrate on writing that will either bring me immediate $$$ (that starts Tuesday, for sure) or get me published outside the blogosphere (thus bringing me imagined future $$$). While I have enjoyed my time as a crossword blogging altruist, I am, at the end of the day, living in the Material World ("and I am a Material Girl"). I'm not quitting, just scaling back, so my legions of fans needn't panic just yet, wink.

Today's puzzle was Another Pleasant Valley Monday, with a cute little theme and mostly easy fill. The theme answers are as follows:

• 17A: Sex appeal (animal magnetism)
• 25A: Where to grow carrots and spinach (vegetable garden)
• 42A: Places to find some gems (mineral deposits)

The Featured Five (a new daily section of blog designed to keep me on a clue count)

43D: Rapper a k a Slim Shady (Eminem)

First of all, "a space k space a" looks all kinds of wrong. Put periods after each letter or squish 'em all together, but for god's sake don't leave them floating there like that. The "k" looks particularly unnatural. I enjoy EMINEM despite the fact that his lyrics have occasionally been deeply disturbing (killing one's girlfriend, etc.). He's mainly a clown, and a very effective one at that. He's a sensational rapper and his lyrics are often way more thoughtful than he's given credit for. Also, he was quite good in "EIGHT (34A: Two cubed) Mile," directed by Curtis Hanson of "L.A. Confidential" and "Wonder Boys" fame.

50A: With 52-Across, Thomas Gainsborough portrait, with "The" ("Blue / Boy")

First, I like art in my puzzles. Second, I like the way this two parter is executed - in consecutive Across clues, so that you can actually see the connection in the grid (unlike, say, 30D: With 18-Down, Tibetan V.I.P. (Dalai / Lama), where the parts are far from one another and the second part is actually higher up in the grid than the first ... which is not illegal or wrong, just not as elegant or tidy as BLUE followed immediately by BOY).

40A: "Don't let these guys escape!" ("Get 'em!")

Great bit of colloquialism. Love it. You know what I'd really love to see in the grid: DIG 'EM. He's the spokesfrog for what are now called "Honey Smacks" - growing up, I knew them as "Sugar Smacks." Here is a priceless bit of information about the cereal's name change. Thanks to whatever genius wrote this copy for Wikipedia:

In the early 1990s, it had been discovered that the current mascot, Dig 'Em Frog, was just calling the cereal "Smacks", so the word "Honey" was dropped from the name, and the product was then simply called Smacks. In 2004, the cereal was given back the name Honey Smacks, which is now its current name. It is known in Mexico as SMAK. In Europe, they have always been known as Smacks.

Best part of that quotation: "it had been discovered?" What, by anthropologists?! "While pursuing my degree in Cereal Studies at Reed College, I discovered..."

4D: Soccer _____ (Mom)

Wow. This is great. I can't believe I haven't seen MOM clued this way before. It's so perfectly post-Clinton. Will we ever see 2004's "Security DAD," or "NASCAR DAD," or whatever the hell they were calling the conservative white male minority that has controlled the world time immemorial? I think I'd prefer ["Major _____"] or even ["Ghost _____"] to [Security _____].

41D: _____ Stone (hieroglyphic key)

First, why does this answer get a parenthetical explanation, where [Soccer _____] does not? Seriously, I wanna know. Second, ROSETTA Stone is also the name of language acquisition software that I somehow have to get my hands on without paying any money (it's expensive). I really want to learn another language - or I could just brush up my Very Rusty French.

Stumpers

Speaking of French, what does "On the qui vive" mean??? I weirdly knew the answer to 56D: On the _____ vive, but I don't know where or why I've heard that expression. I could look it up now, but no time. Words I didn't know very well in this puzzle included DAVIT (37A: Anchor hoister) - which I've seen recently in a puzzle and still couldn't dredge up without many crosses - and 46A: D-Day craft: Abbr. (LST) - which I know has appeared in crosswords many times before, but I still can't ever remember it. I have enough WWII-related short answers to keep in my head as it is (LST stands for "Landing Ship, Tank" by the way).

Final Thoughts and Questions:

Are DEMS really 13D: Clinton followers, for short? You do know he's not president anymore, right? I mean, we all wish that weren't so - that he could have been like FDR before the Constitutional amendment and gone on and on, but he's gone. And he's not coming back. And if you are thinking that anyone's following Hillary anywhere, you are Dreaming. And as for SUNLIGHT, I thought it stimulated your body to produce Vitamin D - I didn't know it was considered a 9D: Source of vitamin D. Maybe that's what "source" means and I'm splitting hairs. Lastly, enough with bridge-related clues already. I have seen GOREN (27D: Charles who wrote "Winning Bridge Made Easy") twice now, both times on Mondays. That's enough. The next time you wanna clue GOREN ... well, first change it to GORAN, and then try [Netman Ivanisevic].

Signed, Rex Parker, King of CrossWorld

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