Rex Parker Does the NYT Crossword Puzzle: Extinct relative of emu

Constructor: Phil Ruzbarsky

Relative difficulty: Easy-Medium

THEME: "E.U. Doings" — familiar phrases have an "E" switched to a "U," creating wacky phrases, which are then clued "?"-style

Word of the Day: Nagana (18D: Transmitter of nagana => TSE TSE) — also n.

An often fatal disease of African ungulates caused by various species of trypanosomes and transmitted by the bite of the tsetse fly. Also called tsetse disease.

[Zulu -nakane.]

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An easy and somewhat lackluster Sunday. A single letter change seems an insufficient basis for a Sunday-sized puzzle theme. And just six theme answers? I feel cheated. Plus I just hate the word "DOINGS," and the phrase "E.U. DOINGS" has no currency and thus makes a strange title for a puzzle. Maybe PuzzleGirl will feel differently about the puzzle. She was supposed to do this write-up with me, but when we returned from yesterday's crossword tournament in Queens, she had what she believed was a migraine and went straight to bed. She's still sleeping. The apartment we're staying in gets the NYT delivered, but ... it was some small version with no magazine (!?!?!). What the hell? I'd say someone stole parts of the paper, but there's only one other apt on this floor, and I don't think anyone's home. I was looking forward to some good old-fashioned dead-tree solving, but no. Back on-screen again.

Had next to no problems with this puzzle (despite the usual small assortment of mystery answers). The one part that baffled me was the 5A: Logical beginning? (patho-) / 9D: Native: Suffix (-ote) crossing. I tried and failed to think of a resident of anywhere that ended in -OTE. I could think of tons of -ITES, but no -OTES. So despite the fact that I knew knew knew the prefix had to be PATHO-, not PATHI-, I wavered for a bit at the very end when deciding what vowel to put here as my final answer. What's a good example of an -OTE-suffixed word? All I can think of are COYOTES and PEYOTES.

Theme answers:

23A: Used a push-button toilet? (pressed the FLUSH)
40A: "I can't drink beer this late"? ("It's past my BUD time)
55A: Dairy regulator? (BUTTER business bureau)
77A: Baseball official gets revenge? ("The UMPIRE Strikes Back") — cute
93A: "The bolt alone is sufficient"? ("works without a NUT")
114A: Story of a small Communist barbarian? (The Little Red HUN)

Had a fantastic time at Ryan and Brian's "Lollapuzzoola II" crossword tournament yesterday. There were close to 80 contestants, plus an assortment of prominent constructors and other folks helping run the event. I don't know how well I did, as for some reason I didn't bother to check final results (not sure if they were even posted). Hang on, I'm going to check now ... hey, I came in 12th! That's hot. That is also, without a doubt, as close as you will ever see my name to that of Ellen Ripstein (former ACPT champ who sat next to and embarrassed the hell out of me throughout the day). O man, Poor PuzzleGirl.

She was 5 points (out of over 7000) away from being on stage for the "Local Division" Finals. I was in the "Express Division," which meant I was assured of winning nothing, but I had a blast nonetheless, and the puzzles were of very high quality. Nearly every puzzle had some added dimension (a Boggle dimension, an "act out the theme answer" dimension, etc.) — on the final puzzle, Ryan and Brian actually performed the clues for the theme answers on stage. You had to pay attention, because on paper the clues simply said "Movie 1," "Movie 2," etc. There was a version of "Family Feud" (which PG and I missed because we spent too long at lunch), and an interstitial game of Yahtzee that was won by a former student of mine, Aaron Riccio (whom I was happily surprised to see there). It was great to see some younger contestants there. Had a nice conversation with Aaron and Neville "Don't Call Me Longbottom" Fogarty and Laura Radloff, all of whom were really smart and funny. Lots and lots of familiar names and faces there too. Too many to mention. Will Shortz showed up at the very end for the Finals (I should mention that Dan Feyer was the tourney's big winner). R&B will certainly have their own recap. All in all, a wonderful, well-run, affordable tournament with a pleasantly relaxed and informal vibe. I'll certainly do more to promote it next year.

Bullets:

21A: House Republican V.I.P. Cantor (Eric) — House Whip (not quite as good as Reddi-Whip). I was going to post a video here, but for various reasons (not all of them having to do with Cantor himself), they were all unbearable, as most of what passes for political discussion on television is these days.
27A: The Jaguars, on scoreboards (JAX) — they really do have the best scoreboard name abbrev. of any team in any sport anywhere.
28A: "White trash," e.g. (slur) — this answer is weird to me. Most of what we call "slurs" would Never have been printed in a NYT puzzle clue, and yet "white trash" is OK. Could any other "slur" (particularly a racial slur) have gone here without offending the hell out of a chunk of the puzzle's audience?
36A: 12-time Pro Bowl player Junior (Seau) — rhymes with "SAY Ow," not BUTTER BUSINESS BUREAU.
39A: Neural network (rete) — never saw this clue, which is nice, because RETE is one of my least favorite bits of desperate crossword fill.
50A: Largest city paper in the U.S.: Abbr. (NYT) — Vain much? And "largest" how? By weight? Price? (I know the answer is "circulation")
63A: It was destroyed by Godzilla in "Godzilla Raids Again" (Osaka) — I would pay good money to see a western called "Godzilla Rides Again." First step, and biggest challenge: casting Godzilla's horse.

73A: Cantilevered window (oriel) — just realized that two of my favorite high-end crossword words have the same vowel pattern: ORIEL and OSIER. This is interesting only to me so I'm not sure why I'm typing it.
76A: Extinct relative of the emu (moa) — gigantic NZ birds and occasional prey of the equally extinct HAAST'S EAGLE (still waiting for that one to appear in a grid).
83A: _____ Chinmoy (late spiritual leader) (Sri) — total guess.
113A: Pitcher Reynolds of the 1940s-'50s Yankees (Allie) — they could've used him last night. That would have been a neat trick. "Now entering the game ... Zombie ALLIE Reynolds!"
14D: Sister in Chekhov's "Three Sisters" (Olga) — one of those crossword-common fictional names I always forget, like ANSE and OLAN.
15D: Five-time Wimbledon champ (Borg) — went with GRAF. She only won it seven times.
16D: 1960s sitcom title role (Jeannie) — obvious in retrospect, but without the "J" from OBJET (14A: Curio) the answer was oddly hard to see.
18D: Transmitter of nagana (tse-tse) — whoa ... thought "nagana" was some kind of martial art and was looking for some version of SENSEI.
42D: U.S. rebellion leader of 1842 (Dorr) — oh, embarrassment. I have no idea who this is. Although it's possible I've seen DORR in the puzzle before and made the very same comment. Electoral reform. DORR stood up for the little (white) man.
58D: P.M. between Netanyahu and Sharon (Barak) — you might know him better in his more crossword-common EHUD form.
95D: Curtis of cosmetics (Helene) — wanted ELAINE.
94D: Cane accompanier, maybe (top hat) — shouldn't this get-up automatically get some kind of "bygone" or "Fred Astaire" cluing? Does anyone dress this way anymore except at Halloween?
100D: Gearshift mechanism, informally (tranny) — this is not the first definition that comes to mind when I hear the word "tranny." The kind I'm thinking of often lacks a gearshift mechanism ...
111A: Author/poet Bates (Arlo) — no idea. Seems he was a 19c. newspaper editor and educator who rocked some fantastic facial hair.

Signed, Rex Parker, King of CrossWorld

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