Thoroughfare through N.Y.C.'s Chinatown / SUN 6-7-26 / Soda brand named for a volcano / Syntax-reversing rhetorical device / Union victory site of 1862 / Type of Thai red curry / Resident of the so-called "Nation of Poets" / North African fortress, in one spelling / Early Google algorithm for determining the importance of websites / Eighth Avenue express line in N.Y.C. / Like about 88% of U.A.E.residents / Red-haired hunter in Genesis / Country whose flag is known as "An Tridhathach" ("The Tricolor"): Abbr.

Constructor: Adam Wagner and Simeon Seigel

Relative difficulty: Medium

[I haven't been paying close attention, but we must be at nearly two weeks since our last Star Wars clue!]

THEME: "Split Seconds" — I don't really know what "Split Seconds" is supposed to mean*, but the theme is essentially TWO OUT OF THREE (ain't bad) (though it ain't good, either) (66A: Amount that "ain't bad," so to speak ... or what to make with six sets of answers in this puzzle?)—basically six entire rows get double-clued, but the rows have three "answers" in them, so ... you have to make three "answers" out of the two ... or, looking at it another way, you have to take the three "answers" and imagine them as two. Yes, it is as confusing and awkward as it sounds:

Theme answers:

• GA TECH / ANGELIC / ENSURE (out of these three (unclued) "answers," you "make" the following two: GATE CHANGE and LICENSURE) (22A: With 23- and 24-Across, airport announcement / Requirement to practice, perhaps)
• SOLI / STENCHES / STABLES ("SO LISTEN..." and CHESS TABLES) (30A: With 32- and 35-Across, "Now, here's the thing..." / Some board game surfaces) 
• MADRE / SPECTATED / INNER (MAD RESPECT and ATE DINNER) (48A: With 50- and 54-Across, serious props / Had an evening meal)
• CHIAS / MUSCLEMEN / TINES (CHIASMUS and CLEMENTINES) (87A: With 88- and 91-Across, syntax-reversing rhetorical device / Small peelable citrus fruits)
• THE REST / "I MEANT IT" / HEFT ("THERE'S TIME" and ANTITHEFT) (105A: With 106- and 108-Across, "No need to hurry" / Like some security measures)
• WASABI / TODDLES / SOFTEN (WAS A BIT ODD (!?!?!?) and LESS OFTEN) (115A: With 118- and 121-Across, didn't quite fit in, say / Not as frequently)

[22A: GA TECH]

Word of the Day: Chiasmus (see 87A) —

In rhetoric, chiasmus (/kaɪˈæzməs/ ky-AZ-məs) or, less commonly,^{[citation needed]} chiasm (Latin term from Greek χίασμα chiásma, "crossing", from the Greek χιάζω, chiázō, "to shape like the letter Χ"), is a "reversal of grammatical structures in successive phrases or clauses – but no repetition of words".

A similar device, antimetabole, also involves a reversal of grammatical structures in successive phrases or clauses in an A-B-B-A configuration, but unlike chiasmus, presents a repetition of words. // Chiasmus balances words or phrases with similar, though not identical, meanings:

But O, what damned minutes tells he o'er
Who dotes, yet doubts; suspects, yet strongly loves.

— Shakespeare, Othello 3.3

"Dotes" and "strongly loves" share the same meaning and bracket, as do "doubts" and "suspects".

Additional examples of chiasmus:

By day the frolic, and the dance by night.

— Samuel Johnson, The Vanity of Human Wishes (1749)

Despised, if ugly; if she's fair, betrayed.

— Mary Leapor, "Essay on Woman" (1751)

For comparison, the following is considered antimetabole, in which the reversal in structure involves the same words:

Pleasure's a sin, and sometimes sin's a pleasure.

— Lord Byron, Don Juan (1824) (wikipedia)

• • •

I know you've all been wondering how the installation of my new router went, and, well, it went great! No problems. Working internet, achieved! Wait, you weren't wondering that? Some of you must've been wondering that. How many of you were wondering that? [counts hands] one two ... OK, looks like six of you. Six or so. Anyway, like I say, you know longer have to wonder or worry. Turns out I can follow printed directions pretty darned well. So I got my internet back up an running, with full printer connectivity and everything, just in time for ... this. I haven't disliked a puzzle this much for a while. I mean ... while I was solving, the actual experience, I just kept wanting it to be over. So many unclued [See blah blah blah previous clue] answers. So much bizarre parsing and reparsing. All for a punchline that also seems kind of backwards to me. I have to make (i.e. enter) three answers out of the two answers that are clued. Three out of two, not TWO OUT OF THREE. As I say in the theme description, I see how you can turn it around and say that I have to make (i.e. envision) two answers out of the three answers on each theme-answer row. But still, the punchline didn't land as well as it might have for me because it just seemed backwards. But that's not the real problem here. The real problem here is ugh these "words" / phrases / answers. Starting with LICENSURE. Sure, it's a word, but man it's ugly, and I almost never hear it. You need a license to practice. LICENSURE is so bizarrely formal. And SPECTATED (an unclued "answer" in the second themer)—again, not a word you're actually likely to hear ever. "Spectators," sure, but SPECTATED, awk! ATE DINNER? That's about as close to ATE A SANDWICH as you're going to get. In fact, it ... WAS A BIT ODD (oof, not a standalone phrase). Did you all know what CHIASMUS was. If so, I'm impressed, because I did not. I know about "chiastic structure," which I guess is what CHIASMUS exemplifies, but this specific name of this specific rhetorical device? Uh uh. So, lots of weird and awkward words and phrases, all sliced and slapped together in unclued slabs of answer-like "answers." It hurts.

PAGE RANK? (96A: Early Google algorithm for determining the importance of websites)! TEASER RATE? (73D: Initially offered lesser charge)! Whose idea of a good time is this? Everything from ART TEST on down to the SW corner was miserable. You get a few nice moments with the longer answers like CASABLANCA (14D: Classic film said to be the most quotable movie of all time), though that clue is terrible ... "Said to be"???? Who said? How would you even measure that? It's true that I can think of a few famous quotes (including the spurious "Play it again, Sam"), but ... there's gotta be a better way to clue that. GOT A LOAD OF is decent (3D: Laid eyes on but good), though I had GOT A GANDER at first (!), and then GOT A LOOK AT. MANIFESTOS is fine, but ... so many of the "answers" today were unclued that the puzzle feels gutted of half its potential pleasure. No clues on ANGELIC or MUSCLEMEN or STENCHES. Just [See blah blah Across] over and over. It's not that it was particularly difficult, it was just complicated, and almost utterly devoid of pleasure. NO, SIR, not for me.

Between parsing and unparsing and reparsing the answers and the unclued "answers" and then dealing with shorter fill that was not-at-all self-evident to me (HIST? EXPAT?), this one did not go particularly quickly for me. Sloggy. Not fun-tough. Fussy-tough. I think the PAGE RANK / TEASER RATE part was the slowest for me, mostly because neither of those terms is that familiar to me (I had SITE RANK or something like that, and then ... I don't know what kind of RATE I was considering, but it definitely wasn't TEASER. Maybe INTRO or something like that). I had to wait on the Dwarf because SLEEPY and SNEEZY have so many letters in common (102D: One of the Seven Dwarfs). I had no idea what was going on with ANY SIZE for obvious reasons, i.e. that is a terrible non-thing that should not be allowed to pass as a standalone answer (124A: What wristwatch straps are designed to accommodate). Though I enjoyed hardly anything in this puzzle, I weirdly enjoyed MOTT ST (95D: Thoroughfare through N.Y.C.'s Chinatown), largely because it's got this improbable phalanx of consonants at the end (TTST), and because it makes me think of the Rodgers & Hart song "Manhattan," specifically this lovely rendition by Blossom Dearie.

["And tell me what street / Compares with MOTT ST. in July..."]

Bullets:

• 28A: America's largest labor union, familiarly (THE NEA) — Pronouncing this as one word now (THEE'-nee-ya) so that I can pretend that stupid definite article isn't there.
• 26A: North African fortress, in one spelling (KASBAH) — lol is there another spelling? I saw "in one spelling" and thought "dear lord how the hell are they going to spell it today? QAZZBA?" But no, just KASBAH, the only way I even remember seeing it spelled. Although now that I'm looking at CASBAH, maybe *that's* the spelling I'm most familiar with. I already had the "K" in place when I looked at the clue, so maybe I'm just hallucinating KASBAH as the most familiar spelling. Anyway, there are at least three more spellings, in addition to the "K" and "C" spellings: QASBAH, QASBA, QASABA 

[Yeah, look, the Clash spell it with a "C" so that must be the spelling I've always known]

• 41A: Former alliance of France, Italy, Japan, the U.S., the U.K. and West Germany (G-SIX) — there are so many "G" alliances that I'm not sure how anyone could keep them straight. I guess this clue gives you the opportunity to count, so, yes ... there are six countries you've got there. But you don't really need to count once you have the "G"—no other number is going to work but SIX. I mean, G-ONE would be pretty lonely, and G-TWO ... could be as bad as one, it's the loneliest G-group since the group G-ONE. Oh crud, I forgot about the G-TEN, that would've fit too. Never mind.

• 75A: Manufacturer's gross product? (SMOG) — that's a pretty clever clue for SMOG. But then SMOG crosses OPE 🙁 and all pleasure from the SMOG clue goes poof, just like that.
• 85A: Feature of an intersection that forces a turn (T-SHAPE) — had the "T" and thought "oh, what are those called ... T-STOPS? Three-way stops?" I would never in a million years have thought the answer would be something as dumb as T-SHAPE. It's just a "T." I guess you can't argue with the fact that a "T" is T-SHAPEd, but yeesh, that answer, not pretty. And crossing OPE! Rough patch there.
• 94A: Resident of the so-called "Nation of Poets" (SOMALI) — I have never heard Somalia so-called that. This was basically "Random resident of a country, good luck."
• 69D: Underworld boss? (HADES) — if you wrote in SATAN here, I understand, you are forgiven.
• 6D: Type of Thai red curry (PANANG) — good answer. Delicious answer. CURRY killed me on Quordle the other day because I had CUR-Y and had eliminated what I thought were all plausible letters that could go in that slot. And so I wrote in CURVY. D'oh! Forgot about the letters I already had in the word (namely, "R")! Rrrrrookie mistake.
• 36A: Musician who said "Reality leaves a lot to the imagination" (LENNON) — I wonder if "imagination" is supposed to be a subtle hint, since LENNON famously sang "Imagine." I think "Imagine" is kind of an insipid song, so here's something else.

That's all. See you next time.

Signed, Rex Parker, King of CrossWorld

P.S. If you are really into cryptic crosswords (I do at least one a day as a kind of cross (!)-training) the World Crossword Federation (yes, such a thing exists!) is sponsoring a U.S. Cryptic Crossword Championship next month. It's for U.S. residents of any nationality, and it's online, and you can find all the info you need at crypticsingh.com, or here, in this announcement:

 

*someone suggested that “Split Seconds” refers to the fact that you “split” the “second” “answer” in the trio in order to understand the clues, which is probably right, but as a solver, *I* have to “split” the *actual answers* to the clue definitions (i.e. the CH/ANGE in GATE CHANGE), so once again, the puzzle’s idea of what I am doing just doesn’t match what I perceive myself to be doing

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