Start of an old advice column / SAT 12-17-22 / Forked-tailed fliers / Honorific that translates to born before / Eschews a cab, say / Outdoor event with long sticks informally / Some modern media-related speculations / Subject of a Nepali hunting license

Constructor: Christina Iverson and Tom Pepper

Relative difficulty: Easy

THEME: none 

Word of the Day: Jack Dempsey aka The Manassa MAULER (15A: The Manassa ___, nickname for boxer Jack Dempsey) —

William Harrison "Jack" Dempsey (June 24, 1895 – May 31, 1983), nicknamed Kid Blackie and The Manassa Mauler, was an American professional boxer who competed from 1914 to 1927, and reigned as the world heavyweight champion from 1919 to 1926. A cultural icon of the 1920s, Dempsey's aggressive fighting style and exceptional punching power made him one of the most popular boxers in history. Many of his fights set financial and attendance records, including the first million-dollar gate. He pioneered the live broadcast of sporting events in general, and boxing matches in particular.

Dempsey is ranked tenth on The Ring magazine's list of all-time heavyweights and seventh among its Top 100 Greatest Punchers, while in 1950 the Associated Press voted him as the greatest fighter of the past 50 years. He is a member of the International Boxing Hall of Fame, and was in the previous Boxing Hall of Fame. (wikipedia)

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***HELLO, READERS AND FELLOW SOLVERS IN SYNDICATION*** (if it's mid-January 2023, that's you!) How is the new year treating you? Well, I hope. Me, uh, not great so far (COVID, you know), but I'm 95% better, and was never terribly sick to begin with, so I have every reason to believe things will turn around for me shortly, thank God (and vaccines). Anyway, it's early January, which means it's time once again for my annual week-long pitch for financial contributions to the blog. Every year I ask readers to consider what the blog is worth to them on an annual basis and give accordingly. I'm not sure what to say about this past year. This will sound weird, or melodramatic—or maybe it won't—but every time I try to write about 2022, all I can think is "well, my cat died." She (Olive) died this past October, very young, of a stupid congenital heart problem that we just couldn't fix (thank you all for your kind words of condolence, by the way). I'm looking at the photo I used for last year's fundraising pitch, and it's a picture of me sitting at my desk (this desk, the one I'm typing at right now, the one I write at every day) with Olive sitting on my shoulder, staring at me, and making me laugh. It's a joyous picture. Here, I'm just gonna post it again:

I love the photo both because you can tell how goofy she is, and how goofy she made me. Her loss hurt for the obvious reasons, but also because she was so much a part of my daily routine, my daily rhythms and rituals. She was everyday. Quotidian. Just ... on me, near me, being a weirdo, especially in the (very) early mornings when I was writing this blog. She took me out of myself. She also made me aware of how much the quotidian matters, how daily rituals break up and organize the day, mark time, ground you. They're easy to trivialize, these rituals, precisely because they *aren't* special. Feed the cats again, make the coffee again, solve the crossword again, etc. But losing Olive made me reevaluate the daily, the quotidian, the apparently trivial. In a fundamental way, those small daily things *are* life. No one day is so important, or so different from the others, but cumulatively, they add up, and through the days upon days you develop a practice—a practice of love, care, and attention given to the things that matter. If you're reading this, then crossword puzzles are undoubtedly an important ritual for you, just as writing about crosswords for you all is an important ritual for me. It gives me so much. I hope that even at my most critical, my genuine love for crosswords—for the way my brain lights up on crosswords—comes through. I also hope that the blog brings you entertainment, insight, laughter ... even (especially) if you disagree with me much (most? all?) of the time. 

[man, I really wear the hell 
out of this red fleece...]

The blog began years ago as an experiment in treating the ephemeral—the here-today, gone-tomorrow—like it really mattered. I wanted to stop and look at this 15x15 (or 21x21 thing) and take it seriously, listen to it, see what it was trying to do, think about what I liked or didn't like about it. In short, I gave the puzzle my time and attention. And I continue to do that, every day (Every! Day!). And it is work. A lot of work. Asking for money once a year (and only once a year) is an acknowledgment of that fact. There is nothing to subscribe to here ... no Substack or Kickstarter or Patreon ... and there are no ads, ever. I prefer to keep financial matters simple and direct. I have no "hustle" in me beyond putting my ass in this chair every morning and writing.

How much should you give? Whatever you think the blog is worth to you on a yearly basis. Whatever that amount is is fantastic. Some people refuse to pay for what they can get for free. Others just don't have money to spare. All are welcome to read the blog—the site will always be open and free. But if you are able to express your appreciation monetarily, here are three options. First, a Paypal button (which you can also find in the blog sidebar):

Second, a mailing address (checks should be made out to "Rex Parker"):

Rex Parker c/o Michael Sharp
54 Matthews St
Binghamton, NY 13905

The third, increasingly popular option is Venmo; if that's your preferred way of moving money around, my handle is @MichaelDavidSharp (the last four digits of my phone are 4878, in case Venmo asks you, which I guess it does sometimes, when it's not trying to push crypto on you, what the hell?!)

All Paypal contributions will be gratefully acknowledged by email. All snail mail contributions will be gratefully acknowledged with hand-written postcards. I. Love. Snail Mail. I love seeing your gorgeous handwriting and then sending you my awful handwriting. It's all so wonderful. My daughter (Ella Egan) has designed a cat-related thank-you postcard for 2023, just as she has for the past two years, but this year, there's a bonus. Because this year ... the postcard is also a crossword puzzle! Yes, I made a little 9x9 blog-themed crossword puzzle for you all. It's light and goofy and I hope you enjoy it. It looks like this (clues blurred for your protection):

I had fun making this puzzle (thanks to Rachel Fabi and Neville Fogarty for proofing it for me!). For non-snail-mailers who want to solve the puzzle, don't worry: I'll make the puzzle available for everyone some time next month. Please note: I don't keep a "mailing list" and don't share my contributor info with anyone. And if you give by snail mail and (for some reason) don't want a thank-you card, just indicate "NO CARD."  Again, as ever, I'm so grateful for your readership and support. Now on to today's puzzle...

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PUKEKO (6)

Greetings from Down Under, the Land of the Long White Cloud, Aotearoa, Kiwiville, Middle Earth, what have you. You know, there are all kind of endemic birds here, striking birds, birds with lovely calls, birds you see All The Time. There are tuis and fantails and wood pigeons galore down here on the South Island, so if you were looking for a national symbol that was also a bird, you wouldn't have to look far ... unless one of your criteria was that it be a weird roly-poly flightless thing that you never actually see. If weirdness and ungainliness are what you're after then ... well, honestly, even then, there are more striking birds that fit the bill (!) that are actually part of the everyday landscape. The pukeko ("they're like pests ... people shoot them" said one of my wife's delightfully unsentimental relatives) are striking purple-bodied orange-billed primeval chicken-like things that look like non-terrifying dinosaurs strutting across your backyard. I'd sooner be a pukeko than a kiwi. Kiwi are real enough, I'm told, but I've never seen one. They still seem mythical to me. Like Hobbits (another thing associated with NZ, the fascination with which I do not get). Anyway, I am Team Pukeko all the way. Or Haast's Eagle, have you heard of this thing!?!?! It's extinct (as are a lot of native birds now, thanks, humanity/rats) but in its day ... big as a Buick ... a flying Buick. Haast's eagles were so big, they preyed on moa. Moa! Have you seen a moa?! Well, no, of course, no one has since the Polynesians basically hunted them out of existence (mid 15c.), but they were bigger than me. I actually saw a moa tibia today, alongside a human tibia, at The Museum of Natural Mystery in Dunedin, and ... well, it was bigger, is what it was. Bigger than the human tibia. I also bought this moa t-shirt:

[Have I mentioned it's beautiful here?]

Where was I? Ah, this puzzle! Which, sadly, has no TUI, no KEA, no MOA, no NZ birds at all! Wait, does NZ have TERNS (39A: Forked-tailed fliers)? OMG there's something called a New Zealand fairy tern!!!! Look at this baby:

OK I'm going to pretend the TERNS in the puzzle are fairy TERNS, if you don't mind. That will help me enjoy it more. Not to say I didn't enjoy it. There just wasn't much, in terms of fill, that made me think "ooh" or "ahh." I never know how I'm supposed to spell "WEENIE," so WEENIE ROASTs are always gonna be kind of a bust for me. The clue on THERMOMETER was great (16D: Cold shower?) (it's showing you ... that it's cold), but the clue on SPOT REMOVER, meh, fill-in-the-blank jokes don't really work, joke-wise. Timing is thrown off, so groaners only get groanier (18D: "I spilled ___ on my dog. Now he's gone": Steven Wright). Really like ABOVE THE FRAY, but FAN THEORIES ... ugh, I now associate "fandom" with a horrid narrow online groupthink, buncha gatekeepers and nostalgia freaks, self-appointed brand police—sad mean people, basically, to say nothing of uncritical consumers of corporate IP. It's possible I'm thinking exclusively of "Star Wars" and Marvel fandom, but I doubt it. It's an original answer, that one, and I'm sure some will love it, but it didn't move the needle for me, unlike yesterday's puzzle, which was a sizzling masterpiece. Thursday's puzzle ... was there a puzzle on Thursday? who can remember that far back? 

Here was my second big mistake:

My first big mistake was REVS UP for KEYS UP (1A: Psychs), with the "R" seeming correct because RAMA seemed correct at 1D: Hindu god of love and desire (KAMA). So "YOU'RE ON FIRE!" was slow-going. But that was the only slow-going part. The rest flew by (again, unlike yesterday). The clue on RED RYDER was weird, as I thought RED RYDER was the brand, not the BB gun itself (49A: Ralphie's wish in "A Christmas Story"). He doesn't say he wants a RED RYDER. He has a whole spiel, and it definitely involves the word "gun:"

Any tough clues? The ports in 14A: Place with multiple ports are wines, of course. "Retirement" means "sleeping" in 43A: No-frills retirement options? (COTS) (not really sure why that clue even needs a "?"). The "pitcher" in 27D: Pitcher's aim? is someone making a SALEs pitch. That should do it. If you have any other questions, I'm sure the very helpful folks in the comments section can, well, help. That's all for today. Can't tell you how nice it is to have the puzzle come out at 4pm!!!! Liberating. Gonna move here just for the sleep schedule benefits! See you tomorrow (when the puzzle comes out at noon!!!!).

Signed, Rex Parker, King of CrossWorld

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