Summery quip / MON 7-19-21 / Large cat you shouldn't trust on a test / Relative of a great white

Constructor: Stephanie Lesser

Relative difficulty: Medium-Challenging (only because it's a quip puzzle, so it just takes longer than a puzzle with regular theme answers would) (3:30-ish)

THEME: A "Summery quip" — 

• "TAKING A DOG / NAMED SHARK / TO THE BEACH / IS A BAD IDEA" (17A: Summery quip, part 1 (etc.))

Word of the Day: MAKO (3D: Relative of a great white) —

The shortfin mako shark /ˈmɑːkoʊ/ (Isurus oxyrinchus), also known as the blue pointer or bonito shark, is a large mackerel shark. It is commonly referred to as the mako shark, as is the longfin mako shark (Isurus paucus). The shortfin mako can reach a size of 4 m (13 ft) in length. The species is classified as Endangered by the IUCN. // "Mako Mako" comes from the Māori language, meaning 'man eater'. Following the Māori language, "mako" in English is both singular and plural. The word may have originated in a dialectal variation, as it is similar to the common words for shark in a number of Polynesian languages—makō in the Kāi Tahu Māori dialect, mangō in other Māori dialects, "mago" in Samoan, ma'o in Tahitian, and mano in Hawaiian. The first written usage is in Lee and Kendall'sGrammar and vocabulary of the language of New Zealand (1820), which simply states, "Máko; A certain fish". Richard Taylor's A leaf from the natural history of New Zealand (1848) is more elaborate: "Mako, the shark which has the tooth so highly prized by the Maoris". In 1809, Constantine Rafinesque gave the shortfin mako the scientific name Isurus oxyrinchus (isurus means "the same tail", oxyrinchus means "pointy snout") (wikipedia)

• • •

Well this assumes that when you take a dog to the beach you just shout its name. I've been to lots of beaches with lots of dogs (the beach at Carmel-by-the-Sea, where my parents live, is roughly half dogs at any given time), and no one shouts dog names. Plus, if you had to say your dog's name, you'd probably say some specific command like "Shark, Come!" and I mean, if you're shouting "Shark, Come!" no one's going to be too confused. Also, you probably call it something cute like "Sharky" or "Sharky's Machine" or maybe you have two dogs called "Sharksy & Hutch," the possibilities are endless, but one of those possibilities is not you shouting your dog's name and someone thinking you're shouting a warning about a finned creature. Also, no dog is named Shark. Also, how is this "summery"? People take dogs to the beach at all seasons. Also, if falsely alarming people is your concern, you probably shouldn't name your kid "Shark" either (seems just as likely, and you're far more likely to shout your kid's name at the beach). Also, don't name your dog (or kid?) "Jock" or "Jacques" or "Chuck" because if you shout any of those on the beach it's sure as hell gonna sound like "Shark!" Seriously what is this "theme" even doing? Yesterday we had to endure that painful partial-punchline culinary nonsense and today, it's an actual "quip" puzzle, which I thought died out with the dinosaurs ... the only thing "summery" about any of this is that we appear to be in some kind of "summer dump" season where crosswords that should've been declined but were regrettably accepted are now being dropped in the dead of summer when people are on vacation and so the nationwide disappointment will be at least partially mitigated. 

There's no good fill in this. There's nothing going on here. There's just the quip. You should name your dog "Quip." "QUIP! QUIP! Leave that poor shark alone, Quip!"

Signed, Rex Parker, King of CrossWorld

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