1943 Pulitzer-winning Thornton Wilder play / SUN 11-22-20 / 1960s sitcom set at Fort Courage / Bygone office group / Best-selling self-help book subtitled Time Tested Secrets for Capturing the Hear of Mr. Right / Long-running show whose iconic hourglass is in the Smithsonian / Town near Buffalo that sounds like paradise

Constructor: Alex Eaton-Salners

Relative difficulty: Medium (9-something)

THEME: "IT ALL ADDS UP" — themers cross at letter strings that spell out numbers, but instead of getting the actual letters of the number (say, "-EIGHT-"), we get one number spelled out in the Across and another spelled out in the Down, and those two *total* the number that's supposed to provide the letter string. Sooooooo....

Theme answers:

• SONEOPOOL / NINEDED BAR ((9+1= 10, i.e. TEN, thus STENO POOL / TENDED BAR)
• THE LASONERD / IONENTHURT (1+1 = 2, i.e. TWO, thus THE LAST WORD / "IT WON'T HURT")
• "DAYS OTWO LIVES" / "SKIN OTWO TEETH" (2+2 = 4, i.e. FOUR, thus "DAYS OF OUR LIVES" / "SKIN OF OUR TEETH")
• FRFOUR TRAIN / MAKES WFOUR (4+4 = 8, i.e. EIGHT, thus FREIGHT TRAIN / MAKES WEIGHT)
• BREAKZERO / PRESSEVENT (0+7 = 7, i.e. SEVEN, thus BREAKS EVEN / PRESS EVENT)

Word of the Day: "F-TROOP" (53D: 1960s sitcom set at Fort Courage) —

F Troop is a satirical American television sitcom western about U.S. soldiers and Native Americans in the Wild West during the 1860s that originally aired for two seasons on ABC. It debuted in the United States on September 14, 1965 and concluded its run on April 6, 1967 with a total of 65 episodes. The first season of 34 episodes was broadcast in black-and-white, the second season in color.

The series relied heavily on character-based humor; verbal and visual gags, slapstick, physical comedy and burlesque comedy make up the prime ingredients of F Troop. The series played fast and loose with historical events and persons, and often parodied them for comical effect.^[1] There were some indirect references made to the culture of the 1960s such as a "Playbrave Club" (a parody of a Playboy Club) and two rock and roll bands (one which performs songs written in the 1960s). (wikipedia) 

• • •

I have, sadly, come to expect a certain product from this constructor, a product I have never cared for, and this one unfortunately fulfilled all my expectations: architecturally intricate, conceptually ambitious, but in execution, a total mess, and the pleasure factor, near nil. Here's the thing. You are doing addition, right? You've even got a reference to the plus SIGN in the dang grid (108D: + or -). And so when the intersecting numbers in the themers here form an *actual* plus SIGN, well, OK, bam, you nailed it. Nice work (see ONE x/w ONE, TWO x/w TWO). But when the crossing numbers cross off-center, creating one upside-down and two lop-sided crosses that are decided not plus SIGNs, well, then, you've gone and made a mockery of your own concept. Please don't tell me that the formation of a plus SIGN is not the point. You cannot reasonably expect to pull a whole plus gimmick, create two obvious plus SIGNs in the course of executing that gimmick, and then expect me to just ignore that as mere coincidence—a meaningless byproduct of a theme that cares only about crosses and not plus SIGNs. Once you have given me the perfect plus SIGN execution, you have now made all non-plus SIGN instances of the theme look silly and misshapen. So even if you are among the people who believe that gibberish in the grid can be redeemed by math, you are faced with having to explain the awkward, inconsistent mathiness of it all. All the ambition in the world doesn't mean jack if you don't stick the landing. 

Never heard of this allegedly "Pulitzer-winning Thornton Wilder play." There's "Our Town" and then there's "etc." as far as Thornton Wilder is concerned, come on. Actually, for me, there's also The Bridge of San Luis Rey, which I read in 11th grade. It's the novel that taught me the word "gesticulating." I think that was the word used to refer to the bodies as they fell from the bridge. "Gesticulating ants," maybe? Some things stick with you, and "gesticulating" stuck with me (not a lot else did from that novel, though I think it's multi-perspectival ... I really loved that English teacher, anyway, even though he was tough as nails and probably, in retrospect, quite sexist. You take the good, you take the bad, etc. Where was I? Oh, yeah, no one knows that play, Pulitzer or no Pulitzer. But that's not really a problem. The phrase is familiar enough, and gettable here.  

Bullets:

• 39A: Gave birth (HAD A KID) — if you're a goat, sure. Otherwise, too informal.
• 53D: 1960s sitcom set at Fort Courage ("F-TROOP") — struggled mightily to recall this because I had to the FT. and kept telling myself the title was "Fort ... something!" Nevermind that "Fort" was in the clue, argh.
• 11D: Not custom-tailored (PREMADE) — do you mean "off-the-rack?" Food comes PREMADE. Clothes, ugh, what?
• 84A: Had a heaping helping of humility (ATE CROW) — I ate dirt at first.
• 100A: Emotive brass sound ("Wah WAH") — how was this not OOM-PAH, how? I guess there's not enough emotion in OOM-PAH for you? Well, I guessed OOM-PAH because the first two crosses I got were the "-AH."

See you tomorrow.

Signed, Rex Parker, King of CrossWorld

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